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Experiment 381 Chapter 1

by pastatownnoodles

I don't remember much about my life before I came to this facility. I was too young to know what was happening. My name now is #381. I don't know what my old name was. But I was happy. As a baby, I was much happier here than I ever was at the facility. I should probably talk about the facility, right. The facility, otherwise known as Greener Grass Power Plant, also known as the Lock of Fate by me and the others, is not a nice place. Sure, if you walk up and look at the place, you'd probably say, "#381, this seems like a normal place!" But, let me assure you, you do not want to go in here. It looks fine, but deep underground, below access to any normal person, there are human experiments being tested on daily. Unfortunately for me, I am one of the experiments. The people who run the place are sick freaks. They torture us all daily and we don't have the strength to fight back. People cry in their sleep and at least one person is killed every. We don't know who is next to die, how we got here, or how to escape. I was just an 8 year old when they began experimented on me. They gave me every single power that you can think of. But, the also gave me a collar to help control it. I'm afraid of myself now. I don't want to hurt one of my close friends. There's #034, the half wolf- half girl hybrid. Then there's #075, the guy with fire powers. Those 2 are my closest friends. Together, we suffer in the tiniest room imaginable. #034 is kind of intimidating, but she is very nice. #075 is pretty competitive and sassy. I hope someday I can get out. Wait, why should I wait? There's gotta be more happiness out in the world somewhere. So today, April 7th, will be the day I start the resistance in Greener Grass Power Plant! 

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Points: 7
Reviews: 4

Sun Mar 29, 2020 9:59 am
DauntlessDagger wrote a review...

So, this is gonna be short, apologies up front. I have a headache, so forgive me.
🦇This story does need paragraphs. It’s hard to read it without them
🦇It’s a bit cliche. Eh, who cares though! Experiments turning against their masters have been enjoyable since Frankenstein.
🦇Show don’t tell. Show her getting tortured, show her messing around with her friends and their personalities.
🦇That’s about it when it comes to criticism. I actually liked this a lot. This is a good set up, the stakes are high and setting is interesting. Keep writing!

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167 Reviews

Points: 3680
Reviews: 167

Fri Mar 27, 2020 8:55 pm
JesseWrites says...

The idea was very realistic and should be used in more stories. You wrote it very well. It is moderate at description of things. It could improve. There is also a great bond between characters. I would like more of this.

The harsh fact is that it is kind of real.

Keep it up!

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8 Reviews

Points: 0
Reviews: 8

Fri Mar 27, 2020 5:19 am
theescaper020 wrote a review...

I liked the idea of your story which is about the harsh reality of the humans, who can do anything for their own needs.I look forward to see what happens in the life of #381.
The story seems quite interesting. But I think you can add more descriptive information which would attract the readers. The genre you chose is not the one I really favours, but the concept really attracted my mind. I liked the rebel initiated by #381 which will change the life of people trapped in there. I look forward to learn more about the strong bond between the three characters you mentioned.
i HOPE the struggles of#381 will lead to a happy ending.
I'll review the all the chapters.

It is most unlikely. But - here comes the big "but" - not impossible.
— Roald Dahl