This is a poem I wrote a very long time ago, back in middle school; in fact I had trouble recognizing it because I don't write like this anymore, at least not in this mood.
New Life
The bustling streets of Harlem,
The silence of the houses,
The clear blue sky,
The freedom of the land.
The black culture,
In full bloom,
An opposer like a vulture,
Unable to attack until the culture dies,
But it will not,
We will sing in the streets,
Sing of our freedom,
Of our hopes and dreams.
We will shout with joy,
Shout that it’s better to be poor in Harlem,
Than rich in Washington,
Better to experience the poverty of freedom,
Than the decorated yoke of slavery.
Harlem has things that we love,
So let’s look to the here and now,
Its 1925 so let’s focus on 1925.
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It's a pretty good poem. The punctuation is good (something some people tend to leave out when posting here).
First verse is very nice, repetition of "The" at the start of the sentence is good for creating a flow and setting a scene.
"vulture" in the second stanza conjured a rather vivid picture, with very few words and that's always good.
Nice and short, to the point and direct. The sentence structure also helps to convey this.
"Better to experience the poverty of freedom,
Than the decorated yoke of slavery. "
Nice word choice here, poverty of freedom and yoke of slavery is really well thought out change.
Not really sure about the final line here, it's a rather dull ending to a poem which seemed to set up for so much more.