First Ciniquain, Please Critique

by order
  • July 23, 2007
  • Poetry
  • Other

This is the ciniquain I am entering into the contest which I am sure to win. :roll:

Meaning:
Essential, illusory.
Tantalizes, Captivates, Absconds.
It is insensibly sought.

Comments & reviews · 2
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User avatar
order
Comment
order commented · Mon Jul 23, 2007 4:22 am

Um, Whence said that syllable length was optional and I missed the last line when I was copying and pasting it from the contest thread.
Here it is complete.

Meaning:
Essential, illusory.
Tantalizes, Captivates, Absconds.
It is insensibly sought.
Transient.

User avatar
Emerson
Review
Emerson wrote a review · Mon Jul 23, 2007 2:31 am

Meaning: 2
Essential, illusory. 7
Tantalizes, Captivates, Absconds.9
It is insensibly sought. 7
The red numbers next to each line represent syllable count. Here is a description of a cinquain: a short poem consisting of five, usually unrhymed lines containing, respectively, two, four, six, eight, and two syllables.

I believe he did say reach the proper syllable length...? Well, first off, your poem is only four lines, and looking at the syllable count, your for off. I can't really say anything about the poem--cinquains are very odd. Not to mention, the poem is incomplete. Critiquing it as is on content would be odd.



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