Tere mehel mein humara safar ab khatam hua
Dehleez laang kar ab hum chale
Zindagi ke uss modh par fir milenge hum
Jahan rishte kuch kam honge
Pehli aashqui ka hume gum toh nai
Toote rishte ka hume gum toh nai
Duniya jahaan ke bair se hume gum toh nai
Iss Zindagi se shikayate bhi hume kam toh nai
Dhoondha tha woh pal jiski keemat tumhe na thi
Iss begaani duniya mein tumsa ek humsafar mila
Gairon ki duniya mein meri kadar toh nai
Pehli aashqui ka hume gum toh nai
Jasbaaton ko samjhaane ki mjhmein himmat na thi
Pehle pyar ki khwaahish bas dil mein chupi thi
Aukaat ki baat kabhi soch toh nai
Pehli aashqui ka hume gum toh nai
Har pal ka mol mujhe uss din mila
Jis ghadhi tum yun hee chal diye
Aasuon ki ehmiyat bhool kar tumne
Mujhe woh saare gum de diye
Manzil se doori kabhi kam toh nai
Pehli aashqui ka hume gam toh nai
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
Are you sure you want to delete this comment? This cannot be undone.
Mark this comment as a review? Points will be awarded to the poster.
Your comment was posted, but it wasn’t long enough to count as a review. Reviews need about four complete sentences (at least 250 characters). Try writing another review that explains your thoughts in more detail — the author will appreciate it, and you’ll earn points for it.
Hi nistha! Hiraeth here.
Again, it's cool you're doing your thing and continuing with the hindi thing. Though I must admit, even though I'm a Hindi speaker, some of the words were still a little hard for me to understand - so, like, just plain earnest request, a translation would help a lot. It would also allow other non-hindi speakers to appreaciate your work - because yes, your work is awesome.
Love this line- for others reading this and want to know what it means, it's something like:
"We'll meet again at the crossroads of our life." (p.s. that's not accurate but it's as close as I could come.
Lajawaab. You don't regret your first love- no matter how much pain it caused you. Yes, we can all relate. The feeling of being in love, the journey, is worth more than the end.
I feel like maybe all your poems revolve around a single event - a boy, my brain is assuming, and maybe, one of these days, I'll get to know what exactly happened in the form of a lovely little poem - hope that's not too forthright or rude.
Anyway, keep writing, I'd love to read more
hey Hiraeth! I'm glad that you read all my work so carefully and get involved in it. I even feel happy that you tell me exact areas to improve in my work. Thank you for guiding me at my weak points and helping me write more.
So lets get started! This may be a little tricky as I am not sure you can read this but I guess we will find out then won't we? haha...
This is a truly beautiful poem. It is incredible in the meaning behind the loss and the forget and the truth. There is a hint of sadness sewn between every line.
Thank you so much
Hello! I put this through google translate so it might be a bit off but I am still here to review!
I am Sophie by the way!
So lets get started! This may be a little tricky as I am not sure you can read this but I guess we will find out then won't we? haha...
This is a truly beautiful poem. It is incredible in the meaning behind the loss and the forget and the truth. There is a hint of sadness sewn between every line.
Good job and Write On!
-Sophie S, reviewing
Thanks for reviewing my work