Young Writers Society

japanese version ⎜⎜english version

She was cursed. There was no room for doubt.

"it’s people i need, oh people to feed"

this choker accursed would frantically scream

Why could nobody see this curse like she could? She screamed for help, but nobody heard. Either that, or nobody cared. She needed the attention. She lusted after it, like a predator after its prey, hunting it to survive. She needed it from her parents, from her classmates, from her teachers; she needed it at home, at school, on the playground...from everyone, and everywhere.

No.

She didn’t want it. She didn’t. This...monster wanted it. The monster who controlled her wants and needs, she couldn’t stop it. Nobody could. She wanted to be a good girl. No, she would be a good girl. This curse wouldn’t stop it.

i’m doing so well have you heard?

She did all she could: at home, she did her chores, and in school she made good grades. She was nice to all her classmates, never bullying anyone, but she was especially nice to her crush: a boy, not much older than she. She made sure to share whenever she could, striving to be the perfect child for everyone around her.

you see, you see, i’m such a good girl.

It didn’t last very long. She broke into spouts of anger, jealousy, and sadness very often. She screams,

“Love me, I say!”

Yet she was ignored, as always. Why was she always just melting away in the background? It dawned on her: be the best. If she was the best, then perhaps she would get the attention she wanted? But how did you define the best? For her, it was simple: she had to surpass everyone in every aspect. Strength, smarts, and all in between was her goal. It was now her number one priority.

grow as you may, like a sweet summer day

know this collar will stay just the same.

It had been years upon years, yet she was still not the best she could be. She was the best in her school, however. She had astounding grades. In her mind, she was queen of the world, yet by others she was still ignored. Only the popular kids got attention, she had learned. Not the smartest. You freaks, she had thought,

“I am the best in my class, they attest, I’m a girl far above all the rest.

far better than those two,

i’m better than all of you,

you people, oh people

LOOK ONLY AT ME!”

She had another task to do at the moment, only a mere side quest on her main journey. She slipped a small, pink note inside a locker, one belonging to the boy she had crushed on for the amount of time she’d been striving for the top. She was never flustered around him, no, but she always strived the most for his attention. There was something that drew her towards him, but she wasn’t sure what it was.

She waited for classes to be over before she headed out behind the school.

meeting alone in the yard…

Classes had ended, and she was there, behind the main school building. She awaited his arrival, which wasn’t long after. His attention was totally focused on her. This was what she had wanted!

from me to you, confessing my heart…

It looked like he had just left practice, because he looked...dirtier and more disgusting than usual, but he didn’t play any sports. Was this her imagination?

was it a lie from the start?

No, it wasn’t. Her brows furrowed, eyeing him judgmentally. He was disgusting. And now that she had thought about it, he wasn’t smart, either. Why had she glorified him so much? He was nothing. He would never amount to her.

to say i loved you from afar

as filthy a creature you are?

He looked frightened. What was going on?

love me, i say…

She looked at him in disgust. Her mind was made up.

love me, i say…

He backed away as she advanced towards him.

love me, i say...

She moved her arms towards him, and he attempted to evade, but she was too quick.

take what you want of me

Grabbing his head, she slammed his head into the bricks of the school building behind her. A crack rang out in the school yard, yet the boy was only dazed. Not enough.

taking from me, taking from me

His eyes looked to hers in utter fear, confusion, and suffering, yet hers were merely empty, lifeless. She slammed his head again, and this time blood splattered everywhere-- on the wall, on both of their clothes, and on the soft green grass below them, mixed with parts of his shattered skull.

all that i am, and all that i keep

He was still hanging on. His head throbbed, and he couldn’t see anymore, and was unable to think straight. She knew he was almost done. With one final swoop, she brought his head down, connecting it as forcefully as she could with her knee. It hit him directly in the eye, shattering the bone around it.

screaming for more, you aren’t enough

A nearby loose brick was the final blow. She brought it directly down onto his face as he lie on the ground, the life flowing out of him. His eye was now had fallen out of its socket, teeth were missing, and the blood had mutilated his face entirely. She didn’t stop. She couldn’t stop.

you aren’t enough.

She stood back after a minute, looking down at the scene while she breathed heavily. There was not a spot in the immediate vicinity of the body that wasn’t caked with thick, red blood, including herself. She was soaked in it. After a few seconds of surveying the scene, she fell to her knees and was sick. What had she done?

i couldn’t give you up…

i am just so sorry.

The next day, all eyes were on her as she walked towards the principal’s office. This was what she had wanted, did she not?

love me i say…

until i’m not completely sane.

This was it. She had the attention. She would always have the attention now. Everyone was discussing her. She finally had what she deserved and needed.

aren’t i so happy today?