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What lies in the emptiness above the sky?

by naazmemonn

Published January 18, 2022

E - Everyone

In my work

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An endless void.

Swirling sheaths of blackness

Empty

Into the everlasting symphony of the stars that

Dot the sky unbound

Specks of purple, maybe crimson

I know not what lies far ahead

It goes on

Farther than can ever be known to mankind

Making the deepest waters and the most twisted creatures seem

Vastly insignificant

Expanding destroying creating annihilating

A myriad of pure substance

Unbeknownst to what we think we know of

Beautiful, lie milky galaxies and twilight laden planets

Terrifying, for we can never guess what truly lies beyond

Breathtaking are the mysteries of what is out there

Frightening, for we dare to think we are alone.

Comments & reviews · 5
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fatherfig
Review
fatherfig wrote a review Review · Jan 21, 2022

This is gem for a review.

I am intrigued to what inspired this poem. It has a lot of beautiful imagery but the large vocabulary used makes your brain work for it. Written very elegantly, yet you don't use full stops, really interesting... I like the flow of the peice. You capitalize every begining line and it really makes me wonder how differently it would read if you skipped a few lines or wrote entirely in lowercase as it is a stylistic choice. The last line really was the one that most captured my attention. It really leaves you curious. I feel like this poem could have went in any direction but it stayed in middleground. I don't dislike that, because it seems the purpose of the poem is plainly to describe all that is seen and felt in the frame, but I do hope you use some of the ideas captured here, perhaps in different poems. I want to see what you can do with the idea that we aren't alone.

What is out there? Does it call to us? Do we already know it?

The poem pulls you in and makes you really appreciate it, not so much for the feeling it evokes but for the imagery it gives you. I like it, I think you should play with emotive phrasing as well, catch the readers hearts in their throats as they look at the picture too. Very interesting peice I did enjoy it. Explore your writing and have fun.

Have a nice day/night. Keep writing. Much love, CoffeeGemini <3333333

thank you for this beautiful review

thank you for writing :>

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Anma
Review
Anma wrote a review Review · Jan 21, 2022

Hi Naazmemonn!

Anma here with a review! X3

The midnight sky, the stars, the planets and all life.. How beautiful it all is. Just like the open sky above. You have such talent, show me more. Give me more to compendial. I can see the galaxy unfold with every word you write. I have nothing more to say I love this poem! I would never change it. But if you ever have the time re write it! Let your imagination run wild.

With lots of love
Anma <3

i will i will for sure..thanks so much;)

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Shayna Basu
Review
Shayna Basu wrote a review Review · Jan 20, 2022

Hey There !!!
Here for a quick review....
Extremely picturesque poem, uncovering the breadth of nature's sky.... expressing the rare mysteries of what lies truly beyond the magnificent adornment of stars and planets of the expanding universe ....
Breathtaking to be able to hear the symphony of the stars and the beats of the universe through our transparent skies ... Enables us to demystify the empty void of pitch darkness on a starry night and question the limits of the sky...
In a way even the deepest of oceans stare at it and cry.... Truly beautiful and thoughtful!!!!

thank youuu:))

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prettyboy1110 Comment
prettyboy1110 commented Comment · Jan 18, 2022

I love this poem so much. I think that the wording is amazing and helps people picture exactly what you're describing. Everything about this poem is beautiful and I believe you have a lot of talent writing poetry. I look forward to seeing what you have to write next.

gosh, thank you so much!!

creeperfeverdreams wrote a review Review · Jan 18, 2022

I love this interpretation of outer space you two made.It’s got beautiful imagery and describes the wonders of space as well.Space is a vast and limitless void.We admire it and fear it at the same time.I think we can all agree on that.I just enjoyed this poem and the descriptions you used.I hope you have a wondrous and amazing day and night.

thank you! means so much:)



Should we not walk? On our feet? The ones I now have again? I do like my feet. They are befittingly perambulatory.
— Pattern (Rhythm of War by Brandon Sanderson)