Hi there. I am 567ajt. I am here to do a review of your poem. So, let's take this step by step.
"What does the word logic mean?
Nothing but a foul Dean
Why, are life’s mysteries beyond preaching?
Sermons, equivocal in heaven’ly teaching."
This stanza is a bit confusing, aside from the wording of it. It seems a bit random and I don't get the references. You try and sound philosophical but it kind of backfires for me, personally.
"Is it a myth to relive a hereafter scene?
Hard to believe, but to distrust, is still mean.
Who is the wisest, that my blindness unveils?
Those of good faith blindly listen to old tales."
I feel that so far this poem is a bunch of cryptic, nonsensical questions with answers that don't actually fit the questions. To you, maybe they do, but to me they don't. They seem disjointed and just seem to actually add to the question but in the form of a new sentence. I agree with you about "blindly listening to old tales". I am an existentialist. I believe in that. But so far, everything else is a bit cryptic.
"Words of God echo in my ear.
For moral stories I shed no tear.
I am still deaf to your pleas
Whether you proceed or cease."
Now, this is a good stanza. We actually get a sense of your belief and how you feel about God. So, kudos.
"I refuse to see your light,
I won't witness any plight
Take your obsolete tools and leave,
A hard-bitten man is tough to deceive."
So, nihilism then....? I thought you were simply an atheist, but the fact you seem to have become a nihilist makes me feel something different towards your poem. I dunno what belief you are, but it sure is complex.
So, yeah. It was ok. Not bad, but no good. Ok.
Points: 40
Reviews: 279
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