Oh Mama

by myjaspercat

Published February 21, 2018

E - Everyone

In Poems

(out for publication)



Comments & reviews · 2
User avatar
Kanome
Review
Kanome wrote a review Review · Feb 25, 2018

Hi, myjaspercat. I am here with a review for you in honor of Review Day. Hooray! Let's get this out of the Green Room, shall we?
I like the way the poem is formatted, what kind of formatting is this or I guess it's called rhyme pattern? I don't know, hopefully, you are able to tell me :D
This poem seems to get darker and darker each line going down, this poem has so much negative emotions, that it makes me very sad :c
This poem is amazing though, it just hits me in the feels is all.
All I can say is overall that you did a great job writing this and I don't see any errors that need to be addressed.
Keep up the great work. Keep writing and enjoy your day!

- Kanome

User avatar
Chitz
Review
Chitz wrote a review Review · Feb 25, 2018

hey! the review day is on and so am I.

the piece seems to revolve around some illegal act, punishment, rage , suicide ,death and many negative outcome of some bad experience. Since i am a beginner,I don't get the story behind easily.So do tell me what its exactly about. I would love to know it.

coming on to your style of writing, it seems good enough to me. the choice of words ,the rhyme and the format is appealing. The tone suits it perfectly and the reader comes to know that its a serious topic .Something concerned with life and death. I really liked it though i did not get it completely.Hope to hear from you soon.

Stay awaken, keep writing.

~~chitz

Hey there Chitz, its been awhile since your review but I haven't been able to get to a reply till now. The poem is about all of the violence that's been happening in our world today and about the recent school shootings plus the threats that have been happening after. I hope that clears it up a little bit.

Chitz replied · Mar 3, 2018

Nice, that%u2019s an informative topic.



Perhaps it is better to wake up after all, even to suffer, rather than to remain a dupe to illusions all one's life.
— Kate Chopin, The Awakening