Review Day Starts in 1 day Info

Do I stile love him?

by mrschaos

Published March 18, 2010

"Come here white girl" A delicate whisper appeared behind me. I turned to investigate the voice, when i circled around a large set of hands engulfed my body and held tight. I struggled to move away but his clasp grew tighter and tighter, all i could think is there is no escape. The hands slipped in places no other had ever gone before, my jeans expanded and i couldn't stop it. His strength was to much for my fragile body to endure.

"We shouldn't be doing this"

"You really think so"

"No"

Gosh, all of it was to much. Did I stile love him?[i] All i could thing about was Brina. I was deceiving her, they were together now and if she knew or secret not only would their relationship be over but so would our friendship. She had liked him so much but what kept us a part was that i stile had that fuzzy filling in my tummy from the day we first met. I guess i stile did love him.

Finally he let me open the door and i scrambled away. His foot steps followed me out of the large glass doors the indicated the C.E.King High School band hall. We turned our separate ways, i headed towards second period world Geo. and couldn't get his face out of my mind. I really did stile love him, he made me feel wanted again. How could I tell my boyfriend I stile loved my ex? He had been there for me when no one else was. I had no idea how everything was going to end today.

Comments & reviews · 4
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xxclaraxx Review
xxclaraxx wrote a review Review · Mar 20, 2010

Great start so far :D Just a few minor spelling/grammatical mistakes but otherwise pretty good :) I'd love to read more

curiousvampire wrote a review Review · Mar 18, 2010

Good begining. The only problem that I had was lowercased i's and the word still being spelled wrong, but all in all it was great.It really reminded me of myself and how I miss my ex even though I'm with someone else. Plz continue becuase if you don't I get cranky and you don't want a cranky vamp.
C.V

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e.gill
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e.gill wrote a review Review · Mar 18, 2010

Hey I am here to review :)

Just a few nit picks

when i circled around I should be a capital letter.


all i could think is there Again here./b]


and i couldn't stop it. [b] again here!


Did I stile Still rather than Stile


There are a few more 'i' 's rather than 'I' 's.

I was deceiving her, they were together now and if she knew or secret not only would their relationship be over but so would our friendship. This line doesn't quite make sense with the secret bit!


This is a good start just a bit of polishing up needed



Do the right thing. It will gratify some people and astonish the rest.
— Mark Twain