Paralysis

A gunshot pierces through my ears. My eyes are open in a flash, adrenaline immediately reviving my tired body. My vision is blurry. I can only make out the vague shape of my curtains, morning light illuminating them from behind. I need to get out of bed, see what's happening, or possibly hide. I try lifting my arm, but it feels as heavy as stone. My legs too; not even my head can turn. Not now, oh please not now.

I know exactly what's happening but that does nothing to alleviate the panic.

I hear my mother crying out between choked sobs. The gunshot was close - inside the house. I just hope its not her who's hit. I try desperately to move my legs, my neck, my fingers, anything at all. I have no way of stopping sleep paralysis, nothing to make the seconds go by quicker or my muscles work sooner. The crying gets louder, I hear other family members join in. All around me is chaos and hysteria, yet my limbs are as still as the morning air. My vision's still blurry, I can't see if my sister's in her bed across the room. My lungs try desperately to quicken their pace, let more oxygen in to cool my thoughts. They are barred by the disconnect from my brain to my muscles. Shallow, throttled breaths join the backdrop of wails and terrified screams. My thoughts are moving too fast for me to process. Who's shot when will I move again is mom okay what about the others whats that terrible heaving noise and who's crying please just stop crying I need to help and whats that heaving again the light is so bright i cant see I need to see stop that terrible heaving just stop stop stop i need to move and why cant i just MOVE-

My finger twitches. Oh, thank you. I almost exhale a sigh of relief, but my breathing's still too laboured. It twitches again, now my whole hand joining in. Slowly, the sounds start to fade. No longer do the unbearable wails overwhelm my ears, and that awful heaving has stopped. Only now do I realize that was my panicked breathing. I move my arm, then my legs and finally my head. My mind clears as relief washes over me. Everything's quiet, only the slight creaking of my bed as I sit up. There was no gunshot, no crying, no emergency or danger. It was only a peaceful Saturday morning with everyone sound asleep in their beds. I fall back onto my pillow. I should be used to this by now...