Published March 20, 2007
Right, i was going through some of my stuff on the pc and i found this, i obviously never finished it, but im thinking of carrying it on, so i just want to know what you think 
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He looked down at his hands. The dirt had imbedded itself under his fingernails, creeped into the creases in his palms making them look old, worn, they didn’t look like his hands anymore. But then again, at that very moment in time, nothing looked like it used to. This is not what they wanted, none of them wanted this. These were innocent people, innocent lives, they were not to be involved. Yet, he blamed it all on himself, and as he lay, clawing his way out of what seemed to be his deathbed all he could think of was why they started it in the first place. Maybe…maybe it was just selfishness on their behalf. Even if it was, it wasn’t them who went to these extremes. It wasn’t their fault.
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141,687 Literary Works • 675,575 Reviews
Thanks for the feedback, I have done some more of this! (Shock horror I am writing something other than Ice Cubes!)
I will post more soon so watch out!
Meevs
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Very intriguing!
I really liked the first line and the way we don't find out any names, it keeps the reader on their feet.
Keep it up, this could turn into something really good.
Alainna
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Ohhh my spelling will always ruin me lol, im terrrible, but i try, honest! Thanks for pointing these out for me. Im thinking about writing more, but i dont really have much inspiration for it at the moment, but i will be sure to post it if i do. thanks for taking your time to read and crit it!
miyaviloves
It's intriguing, I cant quite tell whats happening which is good. It makes me want to read more.
I think that the his should be changed to them, it just makes the sentece flow a bit better.There were a few little spelling mistakes or sentences which didnt quite work.
None of them wanted this?
Theres a nothing in there somewhere spelt without a 't' as well. It's good, I'd like to read the extended version.