Endangered. Those activities of teenagers are considered endangered because compared to the previous generations, teens were still contented and satisfied with all the things around them. Unlike today, they cannot even go out of their houses without gadgets on their hands, in their pockets and inside their bags. Decades ago, people just lived with simplicity. Before the civilization has reached all the minds of the people, they were still innocent and in their simplest forms. Back then, there were just outdoor activities but not technology. Eventually, technology became super addictive. The youth began exploring new stuffs since then. Teenagers get too much spark of curiosity on these new stuffs they see on televisions. It is so much clear, as observed, how endangered more they will be as years continue to pass by. This is somewhat related to what Chris Crosby have mentioned in his article entitled, “Effects of Social Media on Teenagers.” In an easily affected and influenced generation like ours, there are several stuffs affecting teenagers nowadays such as family factors, academic factors and societal factors. (Chris Crosby, 2012)
It is better for the parents to let go and get their divorce done. However, separation still has a great impact to children especially in their adolescent stage. Because no matter how the parents would deeply explain to the child what is really happening, it is and will always be vague to them because it hurts the child thrice seeing his/her family falling apart. Based on the chapter I have visited on a site, “Divorce of the parents may result for the teens to hurt themselves in various ways to take out their mixed emotions inside.” It is obviously and scientifically not healthy for a child to just keep his/her struggle within himself/herself. Sometimes the child also needs to voice out what he/she is really feeling so that the pain would refrain from spreading hard. And it also says in the chapter that “it would take years before a child recovers after undergoing such experience and it may also last until adulthood.” (How Separation and Divorce Affects Children and Youth and How to help Them, 1st & 5th)
Academics is also one of the heavy factors affecting teenagers. Most of them are students. And as expected, students are always busy completing each and every requirement uttered by their professor. They get too attached on schoolwork that they tend to forget what time is it. They even stay up late for projects. According to the article I have read, “Teens who work more than 15 hours a week at a job have less time for sleep.” And “Lack of sleep affects ability to function at school.” Therefore, stress from school makes the youth’s mind weaker than usual and enables it to function not so well. (Teens Sleep and School, 3rd & 6th)
According to Dr. B.J. Cesey, teens make decision in the heat of the moment or in social situations, their decision is often influenced by external factors like peers. And yes of course, peers and other groups like fraternities and sororities have something to do with the decision teenager make everyday. When it comes to fitting in and mingling, it is not that easy to contradict and be rejected. In order for the society to accept an individual, one must change his/her personality just to be accepted by many. When in all fairness, the society must not put teenagers in the state of pressure because no matter how different a person is, he/she is still a human being to be respected. A teenager should never be a slave of other people’s point of view, he/she must be the boss of everything he/she says. (Peer Pressure and its Influence on Teens and Decision Making, 5th)
Based on Alexander’s article, there are a lot of pressures for kids to deal with among friends and family and for some youth, pressures include poverty, violence, parental problems, and gangs. Other people may not just see how teens strive hard in every activity they work on everyday but if someone will look deep within and try to realize what are the things causing them to be that person, then it would be understood that they are hurting.. No one can ever judge a person not even after knowing his/her story. Yes, it may be visible to us all his/her experiences but nevertheless, no human being should underestimate anyone. Behind every smile a teenager is showing to public, there will always be something that is inside of him/her. That something can be about family, sibling rivalry, loss of family member and all. During his/her stay in school, we cannot be so sure if he/she can often feel loved by his/her classmates or does he/she gets the proper sleep hours. No one knows the rejection a child gets in the society. Whenever the child tries to fit in and make friends with other people, how can someone be so harsh not letting him/her join the group. No matter how confident a teenager stand in front of so many people, it can never be an assurance that he/she doesn’t undergo problems and other factors that made him/her who he/she is right now. If sometimes the youth seems to be wild, outgoing and loud, there will always be vulnerability in their hearts that affects every decisions they make almost everyday of their lives. (Alexander, 2013)
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Hello there
So let's see it. "It is better for the parents to let go and get their divorce done. " Maybe make this longer to include the fact you'll be talking about a teenagers struggle with this. So: It is good for parents to end a relationship with a divorce, however this may be harming to the teenager. I also liked how you gave a teenager a situation here and explained how they might feel about this. In this paragraph you often switched between the use of child and teenager. Because this essay is specifically about teenagers, maybe you should keep the word teenager throughout and don't use child.
clubs/1759
I would like to congratulate you on your great essay! You've done a great job of trying to describe what it is about a teenager that makes them a teenager. I also sincerely liked you conclusion, because it's true! No one should judge what makes a person who they are without knowing their entire story, although we sometimes do stereotype just to cover possible attributes.
I really liked the introduction you have, and how you used a one word sentence as a topic sentence. It's not something you see often in essays but it was eye catching, and good to see. In this paragraph your dealing with two types of teenagers, the new generation and the old generation. It was easy to get mixed up with which you meant, like with this sentence. "Those activities of teenagers are considered endangered because compared to the previous generations, " So if you clarified each time with the old generation or the new generation of teenagers, it would be nice.
Topic sentences are important because it tells the reader what the following paragraph will be about. So in the second paragraph, the first line was topic-y enough for me. I thought the rest of the paragraph was going to be about adults coping with divorce! Not teenagers
The academics paragraph was perfect. And being a teenager myself, I found it spot on
I already mentioned how great the conclusion was. Technically, you use a lot of his/her, and I understand that you aren't talking about a specific teenager so you cannot mention them gender-wise, but it is a bit overpowering. A way around this could be to use they, because you are generally talking about teenagers as a group or whole.
You also use the word stuff or stuffs a lot, which is quite informal. I believe an essay is a formal piece of writing. My advice: avoid this word at all times and use something else. If you really can't think of a replacement, use things, although that's also fairly informal. I think when you use the word stuff you mean technology or items or situations or places. Use these words instead
Also, please in future don't use full capitals in your title. It should simply be Teenage Dilemma. Thank you, and I hope this review will be helpful! If you need any tips or something of the sort about essays, there's a club for that with some tips in the forum. Don't forget to subscribe
Deanie x
Nice essay
Nice essay
Thumbs up!
Keep writing. 
way to go! nice work :3 well done!
Hi! I'm here for a review!
I like your hook in the first paragraph which is "endangered." It made me think of many things that teenagers can do nowadays. One thing that I noticed is why technology was discussed in your first paragraph. Your first paragraph must be all about what you were going to discuss on the next one.
Some grammatical errors such as:
"It is so much clear, as observed, how endangered more they will be as years continue to pass by." ----> I think it is better to use "It is so clear", right?
Avoid using pronouns that is in the first person when writing an essay.
"Based on the chapter I have visited on a site, “Divorce of the parents may result for the teens to hurt themselves in various ways to take out their mixed emotions inside.” ---> revise this one.
Too much use of his/her and he/she was not so good. Instead, try to use he or his.
Overall,
Still a nice essay. You've discussed your thesis statement clearly. If you have questions about my comment, just pm me. I'm glad to help.
Keep up the good work!
Thanks :>