Waking up

I remember enough to tell you what happened, but not enough to recall how it felt. I can imagine, judging by the noises we were making that is must’ve been really scary. Actually, we were running a lot, too. Everybody was. Every time we would leave that little house on the end of the road we would either run or take the bike, during those last few days. Normally we’d be running off to collect food, this cold mushy crap that we’d pull off the shelves of a grocery store while everyone else was still stealing TV’s. Now that I think about it, I don’t see why we didn’t steal a TV. Would’ve been better then the stupid canned food. Hell, probably would’ve tasted better, too. I would’ve given anything then to be where I am now. I’m serious, before I woke up just the other day, the world was going up in smoke. Deteriorating, more like.

The last day I spent on that dying world, the day I fell asleep, I can remember vividly, or kinda vividly. I’m still fuzzy on what I said, and what she said. Her name was Lizzie… Lizzie something. I dunno. Something with a ‘C’ I think. Lizzie Carlson? Carlton? Christie? I dunno. Her last name isn’t really important. Bet she’d love it here, though. Anyway, so the last day was either really scary or really fun, because we were running together, hand in hand, screaming like two bats outta hell. Must’ve been funny to watch. Maybe we were playing a game? I remember that every five seconds I’d just yell her name, for no reason, and she’d yell mine in return. Actually, I don’t think it was fun, because we were being chased by this zombie. Yeah, probably wasn’t fun, because this guy was chasing us, and we were running. God, do I remember him. Grey skin stretched and torn over swollen, rotten flesh and exposed bone, with the strength of a man who was already dead. What did he have to lose?

Somewhere along the lines I must’ve fallen over. Yeah, I was tripped, by some stupid tree root that was jutting out of the ground. No sooner had that happened then the zombie had lunged at me, for the closest part of me, which was my leg, and took a big bite out of it. It hurt like hell. Now that I think about it, it really did hurt a lot, and I was in the middle of being eaten alive, so I guess it couldn’t have been fun. No, yeah, it definitely wasn’t fun. Thank god Lindsey or whatever came over with a rock and smashed the bastards head.

I guess she dragged me indoors, because that’s where I was when I started to fall asleep. Yeah, I remember that. She was a real jerk about it. She kept slapping me. “Don’t fall asleep!” she’d keep screaming. “Don’t lose me! C’mon…” but I just wanted to sleep. It was at this point when another zombie started banging on the door. I didn’t care. Zombies can’t break doors, I think. I dunno. I just wanted to go to sleep, but this crazy Laurey chick wouldn’t let me. Pretty soon, though, I did fall asleep.

That sleep was the most empty, dark, cold sleep you could imagine. Think of this: You’re floating through space, only there are no stars. Just an inky black void, where there is no light, and no feeling. Except cold. It wasn’t like really cold, but it penetrated your very bones to the point where you couldn’t even shiver, because you were scared that they’d snap. This sleep lasted for what felt like a waking day, maybe more. I just sat there, cold and alone and dark. And I got really, and I mean really hungry.

Now this part I can remember as though it were yesterday. In fact, I can remember everything after I woke up. Not much has happened, but still, I can remember it all. I remember being absolutely ravenous. I didn’t want to wake up at first, but somebody was slapping me. The first thing I thought to say was “Dammit, Lilly! Let me get some frickin’ sleep!” but as I looked, it wasn’t what’s her face at all. It was a giant chicken. Not like a chicken with feathers or a head or anything, but a perfectly cooked, butter brushed, golden bird, baked perfectly with delicate yet liberal amounts of herbs and spices. And the thing was literally slapping me right in the face, yelling some unintelligible garble. “Blable blah blabie blah blah.” it said. But the voice sounded oddly like What’s her faces voice. I didn’t really care, though. Again, I was starving. As soon as it went to slap me for the third time, I grabbed it’s wing and took a big bite, an entire mouthful of the best chicken you ever tasted. Whoever cooked and reanimated this bird had actually injected it with gravy, so that it flowed out of the bite wound. The skin was perfectly crispy, just like a wing should be. It damn near blew my head off. This chicken was the best chicken in the world. Just then I became aware of a banging at the door. But it wasn’t a zombie anymore, but just a normal guy. I noticed this out of the corner of my eye, though, so I was still pretty preoccupied with this giant chicken. I took several more bites, and it started to hit me with its wings, but that didn’t hurt too much. Come to think of it, I don’t think it hurt at all. Soon enough, the bird had fallen still. And it was delicious.

But before I could continue my feast, the guy at the door finally broke through.

“Dude!” I said. “This chicken man! It’s the best! You gotta try it!”

“Yeah, man!” he replied. He had a grin from ear to ear as spread his arms wide with this wild gesture that made you just know that what he was about to say was really important. “There’s giant chickens everywhere!”

“Dude, seriously?”

“Yeah, man! They’re running around outside like little girls!”

“Dude, that’s fantastic!” I said, but I couldn’t leave this chicken. “Here, help me finish this one.”

“Sure thing, man.” and he came in and we both helped ourselves to this giant chicken. We must’ve been hungry, because we barely stopped to breathe. Even then, it took two more guys to come in and finish it with us. And you can guess what the first thing we did after that was. We went right outside to get some more chicken. It was weird, though, because they screamed like people when they saw us. But there were normal people, too, eating chicken in the middle of the road.

“Yo, bro, there’s chicken everywhere!” They would say.

“Right?” I would reply, and my new friends and I would bend over and help these people with their chicken. In no time, we were like a chicken lovers guild, hunting the chicken by smell. And we never got tired of it. I’m not exaggerating when I say that, either. We would literally hunt day and night, and eat day and night, and the chicken was always the same delicious feast that it was the first time. That’s exactly what it was like; eating that chicken for the first time every time you ate it. It was absolute paradise.

Well, you heard it. That’s the story of what I did before I woke up here. Man, coming here was the best thing that I ever did, even if I didn’t actively do it. I ate chicken every day after that. I was always hungry, and so were they. We still are, in fact. Too bad, though.  The chickens are running out. There’s not as many around nowadays. They’re starting to get really tough to find. Do you think we ate all of them? I dunno. Maybe.