EXT. A TOWN - NIGHT
A woman and a horse are walking out of a town.
woman #2 (v.o.)
Why did she come to your town?
Elderly man (v.o.)
No one knows why she chooses the towns she does. Maybe it's just chance, fickle fate.
woman #2 (v.o.)
Do you remember when she came into town?
elderly man (v.o.)
She came in singing with a horse. She sat down and ignored us. We were taught to be wary of strangers. We left her well alone.
woman #2 (v.o.)
How did you escape?
elderly man (v.o.)
(laughing bitterly)
I talked my ma into letting me camp out. I was just out of the town, I could still see the lights of the windows. Her magic doesn't reach outside the town, apparently.
woman #2 (v.o.)
What happened that night?
elderly man (v.o.)
I was about to head in. Camping isn't much fun alone. I freeze when I see that woman and watch her. She's singing. I'd heard the song before, sung it with some friends more times than I could count. She passes. I go back to town, and there they all are- They're-
woman #2 (v.o.)
I know it's painful, sir.
elderly man (v.o.)
They're dead.
woman #2 (v.o.)
How do you know it's the woman's fault?
elderly man (v.o.)
The entire town was dead, every man, woman, and child. I was a child then, but even as a man who has faced the realities of life, a can think of no other explanation, can you? That woman, with her magic did it. It's in the song, in the song.
Singing.
It's sweet and soft.
woman #1
(singing)
The tree blooms white.
(more)
woman #1 (cont'd)
The children dance through the night.
The tree is bare.
Up at the sky the children stare.
The woman is singing. She's smiling too.
A man stumbles out of a house.
man
We'll help you now. We didn't know. We're sorry.
woman #1
It's too late. I just wanted to talk.
She laughs.
The man collapses and is still.
The woman continues to sing.
Fades out
DARKNESS
Ext. on dirt road - Early Morning
fades in
The woman walks along the road, her hand never leaving the REINS of the plodding mare beside her. They aren't taut but loose. The horse seems to be leading her. She hums slightly to herself as the horse pauses to tear some grass from the side of the road. The wind blows through the tree in the middle of the field on her left, RUSTLING through the green leaves. On her right is a BABBLING river, a bit thinner than the bed due to the dry summer that is slowly drawing to an end. She tugs on the reins slightly, and the horse swings its head toward her, nudging her head.
Woman #1
Go on, Rima.
RIMA SNORTS, blowing into the woman's ear, but continues into the town just ahead. Tired affection flashes over her face to quickly fade into the expressionless mask seen so far.
Ext. sleepy Town - town square
The woman runs her hand against the walls of buildings,leading Rima to a white flowering tree that RUSTLES in the breeze.
push in to woman
She gropes for a branch and ties the reins to the one she found. She slowly sits down, feeling the trunk as she does so.
POV street
The business owners begin to open their stores and sweep porches. They wave at each other, murmuring greetings. They all glance at the woman as she WHISTLES. They frown when she doesn't meet anyone's gaze.
Baker
Do you know that tune? I swear I've heard it before.
Saloon Owner
I've the same thing, but I can't quite place it.
A little girl skips out of one of the stores and waves brightly at several of the owners. Her eyes travel to the newcomer with an unveiled curiosity and brighten suddenly. She begins to sing with the whistler.
pan to little girl
Little girl
(Singing)
The tree blooms white.
The children dance all through the night.
She creeps nearer the stranger and smiles when the woman eyes flicker toward her.
The woman blinks and WHISTLES the same melody before singing herself:
woman #1
(singing)
The tree is bare.
Up at the sky the children stare.
little girl
What's your name? I love that song.
woman #1
Lyac.
Mother of little girl
Get back here. Don't bother that woman. I'm sure she doesn't want that woman doesn't want to bother herself with your company.
The girl looks away from Lyac bashfully to the woman standing at the porch of what appeared to be a dress shop.
Little Girl
She doesn't seem to mind me singing, ma'am.
Her mother glances at the stranger who stares up and to the left of where she stood and licks her lips.
Mother
Well, I mind. Get back inside, so I can feed you and your brother.
Little Girl
(Disappointed)
Yes ma'am.
The little girl offers a smile to LYAC again, and her brow wrinkles when Lyac doesn't look at her. She turns away humming the song and skips towards her mother once more.
Saloon Owner
With the words, I seem to recall my dear Grammy singing that.
Baker
My girls sang that song when they were young enough to jump rope.
Saloon owner
It seems to be harmless enough, but I've heard some hogwash from those literary types that'll wander into my place to get drunk enough to spout some nonsense that it's actually about death and such.
Baker
My Grammy wouldn't have sung me anything of the sort.
Saloon owner
My girls wouldn't know anything of the like either.
Fade Out
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
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125,018 Literary Works • 672,856 Reviews
I don't know much about script writing, but this is all I saw,
"Get back here. Don't bother that woman. I'm sure she doesn't want that woman doesn't want to bother herself with your company."
It sounds weird, it should be ether "I'm sure she doesn't want to bother herself with your company" or "I'm sure that woman doesn't want to bother herself with your company" myself I think the first sounds better, but ether of the two would be good.
That's all I saw, good work.
Thanks. I always miss a typo