Dear Jess,
I was just wondering if it would be weird to call you. It has been nearly a decade since our friendship washed away like strawberry ice cream on a rainy sidewalk, but it seems that I have stumbled across your Facebook profile, and holy mother of god I am losing my mind over here.
Could you really be the chubby bespectacled boy that once sat in front of me in homeroom, back when mp3 players were all the rage? Are you really the ten year old that frequently quoted Family Guy, and stuck pencils up his nose, and found armpit farts hysterically funny? True, even then I had an enormous crush on you, but something about seeing you now makes me… (sigh.)
You are 6’3” now, and lean like an athlete. You are still as sweet and goofy as I remember. Obviously, given the number of comments on your wall, you are loved in this community, by people I’ve lived among since I was eating paste out of a jar but still know nothing about. And holy hell, you look handsome (!) in your dorky glasses now.
I was never very good at revealing my feelings. It was always easier to tease, and laugh, and hope that things went in the direction I desired. Which is why I have spoken to you only once in ten years.
That ‘once’ was prom, if you’ll step back in time for a moment. I saw you standing in the sticky club room, under the flashing lights, in the midst of a sea of sweaty bodies. Coward that I am, I actually walked around for like twenty minutes trying to gather the courage to talk to you. And when I finally had your attention, I ran. I’m sorry. I don’t know why I do that.
What are you doing now? Childhood feels like so long ago. I just want to talk with you again, and maybe crack a few bad jokes to see your placating smile, and then feel completely mortified later about saying something so stupid.
So, should I call you? I still have your number. I still remember your house. I remember your kind family. And I remember the old Jess, the one who patiently sat back while I took over our project on Bobwhites like a micromanaging asshole, but I think I want to get to know this new Jess. It’s sort of like I’m seeing you for the very first time, again.
Or I could just walk around thinking I could run into you somewhere. Small town, small world. What difference would it make, anyway?
Yrs,
That Girl You Probably Don’t Remember
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125,008 Literary Works • 672,832 Reviews
Hey there, it's Nike here with a review.
Lemme be honest, it's hard to review pieces like these. Only because they are always supposed to be incorrect grammatically, and you don't need the description you'd give to a story. It's also very personal, you don't want to remove that integrity.
But I will say that it was great. Reading it felt personal. This girl is reaching out to this guy, and she normally wouldn't do that. It's every girls' or boys' worst fear to talk to their crush about how much they like them. I think it's very brave of her.
The fact that she notices the difference about him shows that she really cares. And I sure hope she sends that letter and he replies with a phone call asking her out.
Great job!!
Nike
Hello @Nike,
Thanks for the kind review of this piece. I appreciate your insight. Truthfully, the real version of this letter was never sent but you make a strong argument that made me think twice about that decision! Who knows. I still frequent the same little town that Jess lives in. Maybe I'll be forced to awkwardly confront this issue one day, haha.
Thanks again,
-mav
www.mavisknightley.weebly.com
Hey there. I have this habit of reviewing as I'm reading the story so here goes...
1. Strawberry[not a big fan] so why not chocolate.[never take me seriously].
2. 6'3 and dorky glasses, not my kinda guy[but hey! never take me seriously].
3.I love ur language and how u mix fun and sad feelings and stuff[plz take me seriously.].
4. "Small town, small world" my favorite line. well I review as I read so new fav line."That Girl You Probably Don’t Remember".
5. LOved ur work, it really made me think back, to those child hood days, frnds and stuff.
urs,
Alex
Hey there. I have this habit of reviewing as I'm reading the story so here goes...
1. Strawberry[not a big fan] so why not chocolate.[never take me seriously].
2. 6'3 and dorky glasses, not my kinda guy[but hey! never take me seriously].
3.I love ur language and how u mix fun and sad feelings and stuff[plz take me seriously.].
4. "Small town, small world" my favorite line. well I review as I read so new fav line."That Girl You Probably Don’t Remember".
5. LOved ur work, it really made me think back, to those child hood days, frnds and stuff.
urs,
Alex
Hello @AllisonArgent,
Thanks for the review! It was funny and thoughtful, and I'm glad you enjoyed this piece.
In the future I will be sure to take you seriously/not take you seriously.
Hope you have a nice day!
-mav
*winks*
Hello,
I really enjoyed reading this. Before I get to anything, there was only one thing that really bugged me and it was this line:
"It has been nearly a decade since our friendship melted away like ice cream on a summer evening"
I thought that was incredibly cheesy and I almost stopped reading, but I'm glad I continued because I felt like it was a story that needed to be told, you know?
I want to know if this is actually a letter she would give Jess. Because if I had a crush on someone and wrote a letter to them without the intention of giving it to them, I would write completely different things than a letter I would actually give them.
However, you have the power of anonymity on your side because the author of the letter is That Girl You Probably Don't Remember. This means there doesn't have a be a filter on what she says because she most likely won't be identified.
Maybe I'm overthinking this but I wish I had a better understanding of the audience of this letter. Is it intended for Jess' eyes or only to be written in the girl's diary to remain locked away forever?
If Jess was actually meant to read this, then I don't think it's that effective. If it's only meant for her eyes, I do think it's effective and I think there is more she can say and more feeling she can empty out onto the page.
Is this a review? I don't know. But I liked it and it's my two cents.
Jared
Hi @bigbad1993!
This is one of the most useful critiques I've ever received. For that, I thank you.
I had the same thought about the 'ice cream' line as I was writing it, and wondered if I was simply being over-analytical (which is my general tendency) so I'm glad you voiced your opinion! It confirmed my original idea.
Also, to answer your question, this was written from my own experience. I am 'that girl'. However, I would prefer sudden death, perhaps via a speeding tracker trailer, to sending this letter to the real 'Jess'. This piece was written solely to explore the option of reconnecting with him, for my personal use, and when it was completed, I realized there was actually a story inside of the letter. That is why I posted it.
I hope that answers your queries!
Your observations and thoughts on this were much appreciated, Jared. Thank you again. Looking forward to seeing you works here on YWS!
Have a great day!
-mav
Mavis Knightley
www.mavisknightley.weebly.com
Hey mavisknightley, it's AshleyDashley here for a review!
First off I really like your title! It really got me curious to what you had written and made me want to read it! Then after I read it I was... This was amazing I really enjoyed reading it. The way you wrote it really described how she felt about him.
I like the way you describe him:
It really brings into perspective how much she notices him from then to now.
I like how you argue here. Should I? Should't I? And then the ending about wanting to get to know the new Jess cause you knew the old one.
I saw no grammar errors and it looks good to me with punctuation so congrats on that! Overall I really liked this and thought it was spectacular. Please let me know when you write something new because you are a great writer. Keep writing and hope to read more of your work in the future!
AshleyDashley
You are so sweet, @AshleyDashley!
Thank you so much for the kind review. I'm glad you enjoyed this piece, and really appreciate your thoughts.
I'll be sure to follow you, and keep an eye out for your work on YWS too!
Thanks again.
Have a great day!
-mav
Mavis Knightley
www.mavisknightley.weebly.com
Thank you and if you ever wanna see what I've written just look on my portfolio. It would also be great to collaborate sometime of you want! And your welcome! Have an extraordinary day!
Hi @AshleyDashley!
I'm sorry, I only just saw this message!
I'd love to collaborate with you on a project! I took a look at your portfolio and particularly enjoyed your poem In The Dark. You are such a talented writer!
Please feel free to shoot me a PM if you have any ideas for a project!
-mav
Thank you! And I will be sure too!
Before i write my review, i want to say that i am so moved by your title. I have the exact same problem, and i can clearly understand your writing and also feel a little jealous. I have no chance to talk to my crush of my life who is now on the other part of the world! I think that this is very good. If you were to give this to a guy, i think he might have some consideration after reading this. Some of the things you wrote are so cute and it happened exactly to me. I think it would be even better if you were to add more cute, embarrassing and happy moments so that the reader that to intend to give it too can actually remember clearly and feels good about you! And if your writing this from a real perspective, i really hope you two run into each other. You sure seem to have higher hopes than me!
. And like i said, writing more about the happy and cute moments you two had would make it even better. If you have only one or two..well...expand on that! Write more about that one and make it look cuter and worth remembering! 
Hi @GG4560!
Thank you so much for the kind and encouraging review! I'm glad you were able to relate to my feelings, though I am sorry to hear that your 'Jess' seems so unattainable. That is the worst.
I wrote this letter of true experience (rather than fiction) to convince myself that reaching out to him might actually be a good idea, and was mortified as I wrote it. What if he really didn't remember me? Or had an awkward or indifferent memory of me? Reading your review made me think twice. I actually might call him now.
GG4560, I hope that you meet your 'Jess' again. With the advent of modern technology, there are a variety of ways to make a connection. Sometimes all you need is a "Hey! I just wanted to say hi..." on social media and suddenly, you have a renewed friendship on your hands.
Thank you again for your kind words. If I can review anything for you, feel free to shoot me a PM! Looking forward to seeing your work here on YWS!
Have a great day.
-mav
Mavis Knightley
www.mavisknightley.weebly.com