Modern delights

by marcial

Published October 1, 2013

In Modern Delights

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“One wrong move and you’ll die.” I still remember what most people think about the modern technology. The thought about clicking one wrong object also clogged my mind. Yet, as technology went by, I continued advancing. Advantages of Technology is one of the reasons of “us being us” nowadays. These benefits have aided us to move forward in our lives. Instead of spending our whole day doing research for our school works, information can be served directly infront of us with just a snap. Thus, we are able to do tasks easier and faster. In addition to this, we save time which can be used in accomplishing other things all because of technology – a technology that has created a modernized version of mankind. Through technology’s efficiency, reliance and reliability and accessibility, all things can easily be manipulated by our hands.

Technology have helped us in many ways through its efficiency. If most people believed that dogs are man’s bestfriend, then, they are probably wrong because gadgets and other electronic devices can help man in better ways than dogs can. “For a long time, many(myself included) waited for the point where all our data could be kept in sync with minimal effort. That day is here and actually has been for the past couple of years.” These two lines were uttered by Aaron Lynn and I agree with this. Taking it to a deeper perspective, examples serve as the best explanations. These days, no man would spend long hours walking to go to his destination. It will cause him lots of time and effort. Vehicles are now used for more efficient transportation. In addition to this, students don’t have to dedicate months for researching for thesis. Computers have lots of search engines to do the job. This requires less effort but better results. And lastly, being away from someone you love is no longer a problem. You can always text or call them using your cellphone. Better yet, you can open your facebook or yahoo mail to video call them. This way, you can see them and coomunicate with them wherever they are. To sum up, technology’s efficiency is really an advantage no man could ever regret. If you do, then you’ll have nothing to rely on.

Yes, the whole wide world has learned to rely solely on the world wide web. Ever since technology reached the line beyond the limit of every human’s expectation, it has been the reliance of everybody. Why? This is simply because highly technical things are reliable. Developers and engineers of such continue to upgrade to the betterment of their programs to enrich our knowledge and develop our entities. Those developments has been a great rally round for all of us. Technology was, is and always will be of great assistance to the progress of education, communication, transportation, and different transactions. Like what Delia Mackenzie and Reid said, “One of the great influences that Technology has on our adolescent lives other than for entertainment purposes is the learning factor it possesses. With school such as ours, allowing us to use word documents rather than notebooks, it has definitely lightened the loads for all of us.” With this, people of all kinds are hankering to have products of technology like phones, tablets, computers and the like. All of which can help us in many ways. In the field of education, particularly, most of the teachers or professors use the above-mentioned things to present topics in class. Students, on the other hand, are more favorable with this because through up-to-date presentations, they understand lessons better. Of course, most of the students of this generation are too lazy to go to the library and read books in preparation for their next topics in their respective subjects. Thanks to the reliable information on the web, they can survive. Matter fact, they can access everything they ought to as long as they want to.

In just one click, information can already be delivered. This is through the accessibility of today’s technology. According to an article on the advantages and disadvantages of technology, throughout history, technological innovations have helped humankind improve their standards of living, beginning with the simple invention of bone tools of pre-historic times, continuing on to and beyond modern air conditioners, automobiles and super computers. Commonly, a phone is the basic need of the modern man. This is why affordable cellular phones are scattered along the stalls in different stores or malls. No doubt anybody can buy one. Actually, even a 3-year old kid or a 60-year old woman knows how to manipulate a phone. But, if you don’t have one or unfortunately losses it, don’t worry. Telephone booths are just along the way and easy to access. Computer is another commonly used gadget owned by many. People buy this because this suits best for all especially for students. If you don’t have one, set it aside. The world is full of internet café’s, my dear. So fear none because all are accessible in our current world.

Today’s generation is truly a new generation. Man is little by little by little changing the world. The things that we never expected in our long years of existence are now just edges of reality. To move farther, adjust! Go with the flow and savor the advantages of technology. Let us not just delight in the pleasure brought about by the modern world. Better yet, be wise in using the technology. Remember: “One wrong move and you’ll die.”

References:

1. www.asianefficiency.com/technology/sync-how-technology-makes-us-more-efficient/

2.http://www.thinkuknow.org.au/kids/tas.asp

3.http://www.studymode.com/essays/Advantage-Disadvantage-Technology-156987.html

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Comments & reviews · 12
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KayleMission Comment
KayleMission commented Comment · Oct 3, 2013

your hook, “One wrong move and you’ll die.”, really catches my attention. I like the way how you connect it with your topic. Your introduction really has strong points.

Also, i agree from what Dark Knight9 says "Man is little by little by little changing the world.
Too much little?". Some minor errors in use of grammar.
I also like how you put your hook sentence in the end of your conclusion just like what kedjil said.

you have very informative and interesting essay. Keep up the good work! :)

User avatar
DreamWork
Review
DreamWork wrote a review Review · Oct 3, 2013

Hi marcial,as you wish DK come to give review :)

First of all,let's see at the beginning of the essay ;

“One wrong move and you’ll die.” I still remember what most people think about the modern technology.

You seem to be very dare to use excerpts of an unknown source (as you do not provide the source and just say 'it's the words that people always think'.But I do not care about what people are saying about it. I recommend you to give quote that is 'more reliable'.However, I like it when you use the view as the 'first person' in your essay.

You have divided the importance of this technology through a variety of fields.But these facts are hard to find in your essay because you mix up it all without keywords in the first sentence in each paragraphs.I don't know if this is your writing skill/style but I think you should highlight the points first before you give details/description on it.

Anyway,I like the conclusion of your essay.Just a bit comment on the words you use.
Man is little by little by little changing the world.
Too much little?Fix this part ;)

A tip here;
1.
a technology that has created a modernized version of mankind*.
Reword mankind
Bias words and phrases may express gender, ethnic, or racial bias. These can turn people off. Bias-free language has the same meaning and treats people with respect.
Replace mankind with;
~civilization
~ humanity
~people

Overall,good job!Keep it up and good luck :D
Kudos,cheers.

marcial replied · Oct 3, 2013

thank you dk for a very nice review. What I mean by little by little by little is sort of slowly. I'm sorry I used the wrong word. But thank you so much because I really learned from your review. I'll surely apply this on my next essays.:)

User avatar
ValenciaAndrea Comment
ValenciaAndrea commented Comment · Oct 2, 2013

What a nice catching hook! :) I agreed with it. The essay you've done was great but some little corrections. But in all it is nice and interesting.

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kriselleabby Comment
kriselleabby commented Comment · Oct 2, 2013

You have a point on your essay. Keep up the good work! :D

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Euclarkie Comment
Euclarkie commented Comment · Oct 2, 2013

Amazing, nice article. Keep up the good work. :D

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christiantiquis Comment
christiantiquis commented Comment · Oct 2, 2013

Nice essay. :D

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shielamendoza Comment
shielamendoza commented Comment · Oct 2, 2013

You catch up the attention of the readers. Job well done :))

User avatar
Nate
Review
Nate wrote a review Review · Oct 2, 2013

As kedjil stated, you have a very effective and powerful opening. "One wrong move and you'll die," instantly grabs the reader, and I like how you continue the rest of the introduction. Normally, it's advisable to avoid the use of "I" in an essay, but you used it to very good effect.

From there, the rest of the essay moves very smoothly. You write in a very casual and easy to understand manner, and it makes your writing very accessible.

However, just as the casual writing style improves the readability, I think it also detracts from the essay somewhat. The arguments presented are opinion oriented, and while that's not necessarily a bad thing, you do want to use sources that include facts which back your opinion up. At the moment, your sources are also opinion oriented, and they're not sources I'd normally use in an essay.

If you could use sources that include facts that bolster your opinion, that would really improve your essay and take it from good to great.

marcial replied · Oct 2, 2013

Thank you sir. I will surely work that out on my next essays.:)

User avatar
kedjil
Review
kedjil wrote a review Review · Oct 1, 2013

“One wrong move and you’ll die.” - This is a very nice hook, a powerful one.

"Through technology’s efficiency, reliance and reliability and accessibility, all things can easily be manipulated by our hands." - You can add a comma after "reliability"

"If most people believed that dogs are man’s bestfriend, then, they are probably wrong because gadgets and other electronic devices can help man in better ways than dogs can." - This made me smile, it really is true.

This is a very informative essay, a very intelligent one. I like the last part where you brought back the hook at the end. The paragraphs were all well-constructed. Overall great job. Keep up the good work!

marcial replied · Oct 2, 2013

Thank you:)

kedjil replied · Oct 2, 2013

No problem :)

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pauuulinejoy Comment
pauuulinejoy commented Comment · Oct 1, 2013

I've been hooked!

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AiraPatricia Comment
AiraPatricia commented Comment · Oct 1, 2013

Your first sentence is catchy. :) Your essay was good. Job well done! :)

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charles23mds Comment
charles23mds commented Comment · Oct 1, 2013

Nice one. I like your essay. Keep up the good work.



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