Jenna checked her phone nothing. Five minutes later, nothing again. "Why do you keep checking your phone Jen?", her mother asked. Jenna didn't want her to know the real reason with was Jenna was getting bullied online because of a text she sent to her friend. The text didn't contain any bad photos or bad texts, but it contained a video of Jenna just being herself. Jenna as herself was very different then who she was on social media.
She was afraid to show people who she really was off of the social media. But her so called "friend" released the video of Jenna to her social media accounts and then that was when people started to bully Jenna. So instead she just told her mom that she was waiting if her friend could stay the night. But little did she know things would get so much worse.
Thank you all for the positivity!! I am currently working on typing out a story about Dally's point of view when he died. This story is a reference from The Outsiders. I will put a spoiler warning in the beginning of it because THIS WILL SPOIL THE END OF THE BOOK. You have been warned. Lol <3
hi there!
It is really difficult to write a story in just a few lines so I appreciate your writing skills. Social media is such a mess sometimes. Your story contains deep thoughts like we are not being ourselves on social media and want to live in the world of fantasy, want to live in others skin and as soon as anybody leaves that world, the people of the world knocks that person down. I loved how well you depicted the friendship of these days, full of betrayal. Just a few grammatical mistakes but it can be improved...
thanks for writing
keep on writing and observing..... 
your comment makes me want to write more. -MaddyHi there Maddy! Saru here for a (hopefully) quick review!
Jenna checked her phone nothing.
"Why do you keep checking your phone Jen?"
Jenna didn't want her to know the real reason with was Jenna was getting bullied online
Jenna as herself was very different then who she was on social media.
She was afraid to show people who she really was off of the social media.
So instead she just told her mom that she was waiting if her friend could stay the night.
But little did she know things would get so much worse.
Hey there! Shey here for a super short review!
Basically I have only one comment... I didn't intend to review anything right now, but I read this and wanted to suggest this to you for future works.
I really enjoyed this piece, because it had a really powerful message. My only problem with it was how the message was just stated blatantly. "This was what happened, now this is the result." Instead maybe have a scene with her reading one of the bully's messages, then have her go back to the video her friend shared. Have her regret sending it to the friend. This would state the problem and show what caused it without saying "the problem is this."
Hope this was helpful for future works. The example above is just a suggestion, not something you would ever need to do. However, I would hope you keep this concept in mind next time you post something.
Overall, great job! Keep up the great work, cause I'd love to see more!
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