Victoria.

PROLOGUE

I know what I am but I must not tell a single human. No one would understand this. No one but others like me, and there are few. This secret has been burning my soul since I found out and I do not want it. I do not want to be what I am. I want to be normal.

Taking a steadying breath, I placed my feather pen and the sheets of paper under my mattress. Ever since finding out that I was a ghost, I had no sense of real and fake. My parents tried to ease me into this new world that they were a part of, but I never felt like I belonged. I was still a teenage girl when I had died, now I was stuck as a teenage girl forever. No matter whom I spoke to, I couldn’t comprehend being stuck like this.

Writing things on paper had been my parent’s idea yet I clung to it. They held all my secrets, something I could never tell a living soul. I had been told a lot about my kind, and about whom to listen too.

My parents had told me I was one of the Amasonia’s, the good ghosts. Amasonia ghosts exist to help mortals succeed their full potential, whereas the Barsonia ghosts exist to do the exact opposite, making humans fail in every aspect. To become a ghost is still unknown, but it is clear that the abilities can be delivered genetically. The Amasonia god, or our leader, delivers your mission for the afterlife. Once you have successfully completed your mission, you are given a new one and gain another level into the kingdom that holds the faithful followers, such as my parents.

Father told me that I was never to associate with the Barsonia’s, the evil ghosts. Barsonia’s have been hunting down the Amasonia’s for centuries and we have only narrowly escaped they’re attempts several times; even being close to the Barsonia’s creates an evil shadow around you and you must stay extremely strong to not succumb to their evil ways. The longer you are a ghost, the easier it is to keep your mind focused on your way of life. Of course walking around the streets of Italy you’re bound to bump into other ghosts, even evil ones, but mother told me that it only affects you if they touch you.

I know that my undead life now consists of helping others, but I long to be a normal girl again. I hope that one day I will get used to being a spirit, but that day doesn’t seem to be coming soon.

CHAPTER 1

Coming back to London had not been my idea, neither had it been my parents. Traveling to London had been the first part of my mission given to me by the Amasonia god. I had been an assistant on my first three missions since my death and was finally granted my own, one where I would complete it unaccompanied. I had been placed in a house full of immortals like me. It was a sort of boarding house for spirits. I was only close to one girl in the house. Her name was Katherine. We had communicated a lot over the phone before my trip. She had died around a hundred years earlier than me, yet we both shared the same morals. Katherine dressed to fit the time period, whereas I dressed the way my parents would want me too.

As I walked along the pavement I realized it was raining. I didn't expect more from my hometown though. However, what did shock me was everything else.

Most of the houses appeared to still be made of bricks, however there stood giant houses that peaked to the sky. The roads were no longer made of cobblestone and no horses hooves clattered against the floor. Instead, strange vehicles were almost gliding across some sort of smooth flooring that reminded me of rocks, but not quite. There were people everywhere. How strange they were dressed was all I could think about. I spotted women and men dressed in bright colours, dark colours and skirts and dresses of such discourteous lengths.

Everything had taken me by such surprise that I hadn't noticed people pushing at me and mumbling under their breaths about how I was in the way. I was certainly not one to be rude, so I attempted to push my way through the people, till I reached somewhere quieter where I could try to find my way to my old house. I stepped onto the road to make way for the people behind me that were pushing and shoving. Yet what I did not see was the vehicle careening towards me at an extremely fast pace. It released a sound that was almost horn-like and yelled at me.

“Watch where you’re going Blondie.”

I pulled myself together wiping my hands on my coat. Before I had died my parents had owned a beautiful three-story brick house. I knew as a ghost I wasn’t to return to my old life before I had died, but I had to see it again. I loved that old house, the winding staircases, and the patterns on the walls. It was beautiful.

When I arrived at the house I realized it looked nothing like it did when we lived here in the 1800’s. It had been painted bright colours and was distasteful. I peered through the first story dusty windows to see that our beautiful furniture had been replaced by wooden knock-offs. It was appalling what the people had done to our lovely home. I wandered around the house, gazing through every window I could. I finally reached my room. They had changed the décor but the very outline of the room made me sweep back in time. It was magical.

“Can I help you?” I heard from behind me. I whipped around, my hand on my heart.

“You frightened me.” I said. He looked me up and down and nodded.

“You’re on private property honey.” He said pointing to a sign I had blatantly ignored. But I couldn’t ignore the ungracious way he had called me ‘honey’. What in the world had England come too?

“Well I’m very sorry I have troubled you.” I said walking away from the house.

“Wait.” The voice called again. “I’m James McCruder.”  

“I’m Victoria Annabelle O’Sullivan” I replied. James looked stunned for a moment as he took in my name. He finally reached out his hand. I placed my hand in his waiting for him to kiss it in the manner that all men did to be courteous, but instead he shook my hand roughly.

“Do you live here?” James asked me.

“I used to” I replied, trying to keep my answer as vague as possible.

“Oh so that’s why you were snooping?” He asked chuckling.

“Snooping?” I replied confused. I had never heard the word be used before, even when I was in Italy.

“Are you joking?” James asked. The confusion on my face must have said it all because he finally replied. “Snooping. Suspiciously looking at something.” He said with a frown.

“Oh.” I replied, not sure what else to say.

“Do you want to come get a bite with me?” James asked. I stared at him in shock.

“You’re going to bite me?” I asked astounded.

“Uh….” He said as he chuckled confused. “No, get something to eat.”

“Oh, I knew that. That would be lovely, thank you.” I replied. He took my hand in his and led me away from the house towards one of the strange contraptions I had seen on the roads instead of horses. I pulled my hand out of his.

“Don’t you have a, uh, a horse and carriage?” I asked confused.

“What, are you from the 18^th century?” He asked. I thought I was caught for sure, until he laughed hysterically.

“I’m messing with you sweetie.” I was still confused. I didn’t understand the language this boy was using. But I did want to go to lunch with him, so I just smiled and waited for James to help me into the seat. I guess chivalry went out of style because James had no idea why I was waiting. I grabbed the handle and pushed. Nothing happened. I pushed the handle again and the door didn’t open.

“It’s pull. Guess you have one of those smart cars right?”

“Yes, in Italy we all have smart cars.” I responded not knowing what a smart car was, but not wanting to totally embarrass myself. He nodded and opened the door for me.

The inside of the car was fascinating. There were all sorts of buttons and electronics that no one used in the 1800’s. It astounded me, as we drove through the streets of London, that the car could move so fast. I had never been inside a vehicle that could travel this fast. I was so intrigued that I didn’t notice that we had stopped in front of a lovely restaurant with the name La Caspiana printed on the window.

“I thought since you were from Italy, I would take you to an Italian restaurant” James said as he hopped out of the car and came around to my side. When he opened the door I felt my hope for chivalry heighten slightly. I slid out of the car as lady-like as possible. There was a group of girls about my age sitting at a table outside of the restaurant drinking their coffees. When James and I had parked the girls looked up and began staring at me.

“Hi James.” One of the girls said in a tone that would have gotten you banished two hundred years ago. James cleared his throat uncomfortably and returned a tight smile.

“Hi Kate.” He responded. I watched appalled as she made an unseemly gesture for him to come towards her.

“Kate, back off. I’m on a date.” James said to the girl he called Kate. James then grabbed my hand and nearly dragged me into the restaurant. I pulled my hand out of his grasp.

“Well I never.” I declared.

“I’m sorry Victoria, I didn’t mean to grab you so hard.” James said. I looked into his eyes and saw sincerity.

“It’s perfectly fine.” I said in my aristocratic tone that I had been taught to use since I was a child. Father taught me to only use it if I found myself scared.

 “Shall we get a table?” James asked me. I nodded and he led me towards a table in the back of the restaurant. I shrugged out of my winter coat and hung it on the chair behind me. I looked up and he was again looking at me strangely.

“Is something the matter?” I asked.

“It’s just… your clothes… They haven’t been worn for centuries.”

“Yes well, I went to a costume party before I arrived at the house.” I said confidently, trying to hide any evidence of dishonesty from my face. He obviously believed me because he returned my smile.

“Well then, you look like a total 1800’s princess.” He said as he waved a waiter over. I smiled at him. James was a typically handsome young man. His eyes were the colour of the bottom of the ocean, a deep blue. I had never found myself attracted to another man after I had died.

When I was alive my father had hand-picked a sweet gentleman who was going to take over fathers estate when I died. But I had died young and, little did I know, so had my parents. They both believed whole-heartedly that I would be a spirit like them one day; but to keep up appearances they had to act like they were choosing a suitor for me.

Although Jonathon was a lovely man, he had died over one hundred years ago and I had never loved him either. But now, being at lunch with a mere mortal, I felt alive again. It was unusual for me to feel this way. But with the goofy grin that James placed on his face I felt drawn to him.

“What’ll it be?” The waiter asks impatiently. She was a short stumpy girl who looked like she was just out of high school.

“I’ll have a plate of spaghetti.” James said pleasantly.

“I’ll have a gnocchi please.” I replied silently grinning that I had gone to the Italian restaurants.

Once we finished our meals James drove me home, well to my temporary home. I was surprised when we reached the house that I didn’t want to say goodbye. He helped me out of the car and walked me to the door. When I was about to enter he grabbed my hand and spun me to face him. Without warning James’s lips crashed into mine, and his hands moved to my waist. I enjoyed his lips on mine and was ashamed of myself for giving into such sensual pleasures. When I finally got a hold of myself I pulled away from him, opened the door, and ran inside slamming the door in his face.

I ran to the closest window and pulled the curtains open slightly. James was still standing at the door with a shocked expression on his face. I felt bad for the way I had treated him and knew that I should go back out and apologize for slamming the door in his face. I knew my parents would be ashamed at how impolite I had been. I walked slowly towards the wooden door and grasped the handle and turned. I pushed it slightly and then all the way. James was gone. I would never see him again.

CHAPTER 2

Katherine had been the first to greet me when I’d arrived at the boarding house for ghosts on missions. It had been when I’d slammed the door on James’ face and rushed inside during the heat of the moment of my embarrassment.

I was now sitting on the sofa, hands wringing around each other in my lap. Katherine was sat to my right, and the other ghosts were sitting in various places in the front room, around me.

“So, Katherine, are you going to introduce us to the new girl?” An endearing blonde girl asked. She had small features that suited her petite frame.

“Yes, of course. Victoria, this is Anna. Short for Annabelle.” She gestured to the girl. I waved and she smiled back.

“The quiet boy at the back there is Arthur.” He peeked over his shoulder. His expression looked serious, yet slightly curious. I gently smiled and waved however he simply turned away again. “He’s not that social.”

“Those are the terrifying twins, Rebecca and Jessica.” Katherine signaled towards two pretty brunettes, their hair tied up into neat ponytails. They grinned and whispered between each other. I felt apprehensive towards them.

Although there were only roughly around 7 other people, not including Katherine and me, it felt like there were so many people.

“There’s also Master Henry and his companion Claire, but they are out at an exhibition.”

“Oh.” I say looking around the room gaping. It was nothing compared to the house that I had lived in with my parents, but the aura of this house, the genuine cheerfulness of the house made me excited. I glanced over at Katherine who was gently clasping my arm and dragging me out the door towards my room. I was astounded at how beautifully and elegantly it was decorated. I placed my bag on the empty chair and walked towards the bed.

It was a four-poster bed, carefully draped with beige and ivory white sheets, blankets and pillows. I skimmed my hand across the soft bedding and sighed in content.

“Thank you Katherine. The room is absolutely debonair.” I turned and beamed towards the taller girl. She walked beside me and patted my shoulder in a friendly manner.

“I hope it reaches your standards Vicky. Let me know if you require anything from us, anytime.” She walked to stand in the doorframe. “You should get some rest now. We’ll greet you properly in the morning, during breakfast.”

I nodded and as she walked away I called her back.

“Katherine?” She stopped in her pursuit and turned to face me. “Yes?”

I looked down at my clothes then back up to my companion.

“Do you think you could help me, uh, fit in?” I asked. She squealed in excitement and rushed towards me, picking me up into a firm hug.

“Of course,” she said brightly. “Just let me get changed.” With that she rushed out of the door. I waited for about ten minutes and she was back, dressed in a short black dress that showed off more that I could even imagine doing. She grasped my hand and dragged me towards the front door.

I looked over at Arthur who shrugged his shoulders as we rushed past. When we were in the car, she started it up and we were on the road. I didn’t know what to think or what to do. Everything suddenly felt like it had sped up, and I was finding it a little bit difficult to keep up with Katherine’s joyous speed.

Katherine parked the car outside a little boutique and hopped out of the car. I did the same. We walked inside and Katherine started pulling things off racks and throwing them over her shoulder as she continued searching the store. I watched in astonishment until she was finished and she grabbed my hand leading me towards the changing rooms. Once we were inside and she had locked the doors Katherine handed me a strapless, short blue dress. I shook my head.

“No, Katherine, I can’t wear that.” I said, staring at the dress in shock.

“Yes, you can.” She said. I smiled. She was doing what I asked her too. What would it hurt to try on some of the choices? I thought.

“Okay.” I said slipping my dress off. Katherine giggled when she noticed I was wearing a corset.

“Come on Vicky, are you serious?” She asked. I smiled too. It was peculiar to wear these clothes in this era. I finally slipped the blue outfit on and Katherine gasped.

“What?” I asked worriedly.

“You look absolutely stunning.” Katherine said, turning my shoulders so I could look into the mirror. It was like something out of the movies, like it wasn’t me. I stared for a while, running my hands over my collarbones. I looked beautiful.

“I look…” I trailed off.

“Hot!” Katherine finished for me. I laughed.

“Yes, I look like I’m going to burst into flames.” I replied. She laughed.

“It means sexy.” She explained. I blushed and turned away from the mirror.

“Okay. Pass me another.”

When we left the shop I had about twenty different outfits. Some were ‘hot numbers’ as Katherine called them, and some were just nice things to wear out that weren’t hooped skirts. I liked the loose feeling of the clothes. The way I could freely walk without feeling sucked in. As we walked down the street eating ice cream, I spotted James standing on the corner with another man. I watched as he turned and saw me. He smiled weakly and raised his hand in a wave. I smiled back. I waved at him to come here.

“Hi Victoria. Wow” He stated as he got a good look at me. “You look… Amazing” He finally got out.

“Thank you.” I said blushing. Katherine nudged my ribs.

“Vicky, I’m gonna go find a rest room okay?” She said as she began walking away slowly, a smirk on her face. I nodded, my eyes focused on James.

“So it’s Vicky?” He asked. I noticed that he was nervous, the way he shifted from one foot to the other. I smiled.

“It’s Victoria, but Katherine insists on calling me Vicky.” I replied.

“I think I like Tori better.” He told me. I felt my cheeks heat up a little.

“Look James, about the other day…” I started but he waved his hand in the air like it didn’t matter. Well if that was how he wanted to think about it. I wasn’t stopping him.

“Tori, I have to go back to the guys. Can I have your number?” He asked unsure. Just as he said this Katherine came bouncing around the corner. I looked at her, she knew that I was confused and then nodded.

“Excuse me dear boy, but can you give me a minute alone with Vicky?” She asked. He frowned then nodded. She pulled me to the side before asking,

“What did he ask you?”

“What my number was.” She nodded and handed me a slip of paper.

“Just give him this, I’ll explain later.” She said. I walked over to him and gave him the slip, he opened it and smiled.

“Okay, see you later Tori.” He said and walked off. Katherine smirked at me.

“Well don’t you have some explaining to do?” Katherine asked me. I shrugged my shoulders nonchalantly hoping she would drop it.

But to my misfortune, she didn’t. I sighed.

“He’s just a lovely fellow who has taken a little bit of a fancy to me.”      

“Oh he’s taken a little more than a fancy Vicky.”

“You know the rules Katherine, even if I wanted to, I couldn’t.” I said with longing.

“You know those rules are just hokum.” She told me. I disagreed. They were customs set to protect the spirits from falling for someone that will ultimately doom them. Katherine looked at me knowingly. Although she was smiling I knew that inside she was hurting. Her human boyfriend had just broken up with her after finding out what she was. He was merciless in the way he told her. Telling her she was some kind of freak.

I had sat on the computer for a long time that week video calling with Katherine crying and ranting about how she should’ve seen it coming. I wondered why she was asking me to give a human a chance when she had just been hurt so badly.

“Vicky, if you’re thinking those thoughts, please do it away from me.” She said smiling wryly. I blushed, at that very second I had forgotten about spirits being able to read minds.

“Sorry Katherine.” I said ashamed.

“The answer is that I know that he won’t be like Tim, I can tell.” Katherine told me. Of course, she could see James’ aura. Although I should be able to, I couldn’t. I realized that this could only mean one thing, I fancied James. When a spirit begins to fall for a human, there perception on the human becomes blurry.

“Katherine, I’m scared.” I said.

“I know.” She replied and slung her arm around my shoulder.

CHAPTER 3

I looked at the photo of my declared mission. Emma had been marked by one of our spirits that could see into her treacherous future. She was so pretty, with her short brown hair. She was young too. I couldn’t help seeing myself in her face, so full of hope and happiness.

“Are you ready to go?” Katherine asked dressed in all black. For the first few weeks of my mission Katherine was to follow me. She handed me the pendant that I had placed on my bedside table.

The pendant was bronze with angel wings engraved on the surface. I placed it around my neck and breathed deeply. Checking to see if it worked, I walked over to the mirror. Sure enough, there was no trace of me.

“Katherine?” I said scared.

“It’s okay Vicky. Let me put mine on and we can go.” She slipped the pendant around her neck. I watched Katherine's form softly fade till her body was no longer visible.

I walked slowly over to where I had last seen her. A chill racked my body as it always did when I went invisible. I felt a tingling sensation start all over my right hand and knew that Katherine must have taken it. Taking a deep breath, I steadied myself and walked outside.

The cold air whipped through me as we flew towards Emma’s current location. Flying as a spirit was something I wish I could avoid. The wind current would pick you up and fling you the opposite way, and you would have to fight it to continue. It was a lot of physical strength and took years to master. Katherine flew with grace, taking the wind in her stride. I marveled at her elegancy.

We reached the Watson’s home in only one hour, a personal record. I smiled as I placed my feet on the ground. We walked to the front entrance and walked through the gate. My mission was to save Emma Watson from the tragic fate she had been given. I knew that she was my destiny. That nothing must distract me. I put all thoughts of James out of my mind and focused on her movements. Where she went, who she spent time with. With Katherine and I reading each other’s minds we conversed over how we were going to save her.

The bomb is supposed to be planted in her home. I heard Katherine think.

We need a distraction to get the family out of the house. I thought back.

Good, let’s get out of here now. Katherine thought. I followed her barely visible form out of the door and towards the boarding house. It was my first stake out where I had to make decisions and it was exciting. My mission may seem simple but it is a particularly difficult thing to do when you are a ghost. Yet I must try. I must help this family survive.