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139,276 Literary Works • 672,524 Reviews
Hi lakegirls! Sorry it took me so long to get to this, didn't really have much reviewing time this weekend. But, I'm here now.
I thought that this was a nice continuation of the preceding story. In fact, this might even be a better introduction than what you have. Depending on how the story goes, you may want to have the first part of it, when they make the initial plan, at the very end. This story may work better being nonlinear. If you want some help with that, PM Kylan. He is very good at doing nonlinear stories, and would probably be happy to help.
Other than that, I don't see anything that really pops out at me. I think that Emma seems to be a somewhat stereotypical choice for Dakota as a new friend, but that's just me. PM me if you have any questions. Good job, and good luck.
-Conrad Rice
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