z

Young Writers Society



Crooked

by kingopossum


I am crooked.

A spine twisting, crushing

Distorting the shape of my body

Stealing the air from my lungs

Straightened out.

My vertebrae readjusted

Braced by cold steel

Stitched back together

Scarred forever.

A purple line down my body

Gliding over my entire back

Something to remember it by

Remaining crooked.

With uneven shoulders,

A hunched neck

Constant reminders

That though they fixed me

I am Crooked.

And I always will be. 

Note: You are not logged in, but you can still leave a comment or review. Before it shows up, a moderator will need to approve your comment (this is only a safeguard against spambots). Leave your email if you would like to be notified when your message is approved.







Is this a review?


  

Comments


Random avatar

Points: 23
Reviews: 5

Donate
Fri Jul 12, 2019 3:53 am
Serty wrote a review...



Your poem describes the emotions of someone with Scoliosis, feeling "crooked". And your poem describes the characteristics of someone with scoliosis which is educative. It helps someone who does not know the conditions people with that condition go through, understand them when they get to encounter them.
I like the details: " hunched neck, uneven shoulders"
This is a very beautiful poem. And you aligned every word purposefully where it is supposed to be. And very educative as well.
Never give up, such a wonderful writing talent.




User avatar
67 Reviews

Points: 3377
Reviews: 67

Donate
Thu Jul 11, 2019 4:20 pm
Awru wrote a review...



OMG!!I loved this so much.It has so much feel to it.You showed your pain through these words so well i could almost feel it.The words and rhymes you have used blend so well together.It seriously send goosebumps down my back.Its just an absolutely perfect and beautiful poem just like you.I hope you learn to love your scars cuz they give you strength and power to do anything.
Keep up the Wonderful work :smt023

peace out




kingopossum says...


Thank you! I'm glad the poem has so much power, I never really write them. And thank you again, I am trying to learn to see my scars as a path of where I've been, so your words of encouragement are truly appreciated.



User avatar
17 Reviews

Points: 84
Reviews: 17

Donate
Wed Jul 10, 2019 2:58 pm
View Likes
salia4 wrote a review...



I love this poem so much, I also suffer from scoliosis and its painful all on its own. I love this poem even more because of how it can also be applied in a more metaphorical sense to reflect people's personalities. I'm not sure if you wrote this poem in a much more literal sense, but I peronally love how it could go in both directions.




kingopossum says...


I'm glad you enjoyed it! I personally wrote it in a pretty literal sense, but now I see where you're coming from after a few read-throughs. Thank you for the review and introducing me to a new way to see my poem, haha.



User avatar
51 Reviews

Points: 161
Reviews: 51

Donate
Wed Jul 10, 2019 7:08 am
Ishan212 wrote a review...



Hello kingopossum
I am Ishan I am here to review your work, Crooked. So here we go:
First of all, WELCOME TO YWS!!! I hope you have a great time here and if any query, you can just p.m me.

So your poem is about "scoliosis, even after corrective surgery."
Well, great poem, the scheme of words you have used to get the rhyming correct, is really cool.
"A purple line down my body

Gliding over my entire back

Something to remember it by"

Great poem!!!
Keep Writing!!!
Isha212




Siddharth says...


It would be better if we don't take away precious critique from the writer by writing a Spamish type of a tennis review that helps the writer in no way possible. And there are different places in the site where you may be able to welcome a writer. The reviews are not one of them. Hope you review better.



Ishan212 says...


Well .. thank you for making me realize that I can't review. Why don't u write a post to teach reviewing?




You can't fool me! I listen to public radio!
— Squidward Tentacles