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Butterfly Kisses

by kelseyforgotss


butterflies,
from kisses stolen,
disappear,
like the age of
innocence.


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Fri Aug 16, 2013 3:47 am
ChasingLaci wrote a review...



I love how simple this is but meaningful. Reminds me of butterflies in my stomach when you have those first sweet kisses. Then they disappear "like the age of innocence." I love how its so relatable without trying hard to sound convincing. It just is simple truth of a feeling, and somewhat witty. Love it, good job.

-Laci <3




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Wed Aug 14, 2013 9:00 pm
Jcsmooth says...



<3




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Wed Jul 10, 2013 5:04 pm
ivyLeonora wrote a review...



This poem is short and sweet and that's what I like about it.
The concept is entirely right, innocence is a like butterfly kisses.
The title drew me in towards the poem.
I noticed the poem didn't rhyme, which is alright, but the fact that its short should mean that's there's more to it. I hope you get what I mean, but other than that, it's a cool poem, i guess.




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Thu Jul 04, 2013 11:07 pm
Elizabeth1 wrote a review...



Wow this is a really short, short poem; but I liked it! Remember to capitalize "butterflies" other then that I don't see much wrong. Your poem is short sweet and straight to the point; yet allows the reader to create different interpretations. It could be about a first kiss, first love, even first crush, a longterm relationship gone wrong; the interpretations are endless! That's why I really love short poems. You captured that innocence is lost within seconds very well, that something beautiful can be shattered within seconds. For some reason I can imagine this being in a song or you including this and making it into a longer poem. Overall you did great! :)




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Thu Jul 04, 2013 6:26 pm
dark wrote a review...



Wow, this is very beautiful for a short poem. Or course it's a bit too short, but it's fine to me.
Also butterflies should be capitalized as others have probably told you, it's a simple fix, but if you don't want to be reminded about it, you could edit the poem and fix it that's all. :)
Are these a part of a song? One would think so because one of the categories is lyrical, which is usually given to poems that are part of an actually song or that are meant to be read with a inning voice. That's what I think anyway. Also the size of the poem allows me to continuously analyze and examine the poem for and extended leghth of time. I like Thats aspect of this poem a lot. Also I like the way you gave 10 words a big meaning regarding the loss of innocence. Thanks for writing such a great poem! :D
~Dark






I do not know how to edit the poem, and I apologize for my typo. To me, these poems have a lyrical form, just in their simplicity and harmony. Thanks for your review!



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Thu Jul 04, 2013 4:05 pm
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Neonrose wrote a review...



I like your poem it's short and sweet. The first letter of butterflies should be capitalized but other than that the poem was very good. You put the commas in the right places . It was a short way of putting a crush gone wrong or a ending relationship. Again I like this poem and I would like to read more of your work. Forgive me if this review is bad I'm new at this.






Simple typing error, oops! Thank you so much, it's a wonderful first review!



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Thu Jul 04, 2013 3:10 pm
sbitonti wrote a review...



Hi! Just a little nit-picky thing, I would capitalize Butterflies to introduce your poem. This poem really says a lot, I'm guessing you can interpret it as a young love, or a love gone wrong, or even what someone thinks is love but has only appeared to become deceit.
I really love short poems for the purpose that you can analyze them forever. I love the metaphors you've incorporated in the poem, and they are also relevant with the theme. For example, When One thinks of kisses, one also thinks of butterflies. They are in the same positive denotations and context.
Good punctuation, you did no wrong with the commas. I overall really do like this poem. It's a good one. Keep writing!






Definitely a love gone wrong..
I agree that you could analyze them forever: they are so short that the meaning is either blatantly obvious, or nonexistent. However, with the lack of overwhelming sensory details, it leaves quite a bit up to the imagination.



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Thu Jul 04, 2013 3:26 am
hockeyfan87 wrote a review...



I really like this. I like how short but sweet it is. The only thing I noticed is that butterflies isn't capitalized at the beginning. I don't know if that was supposed to be lower case for like writing purposes, if so then I don't think you need the period after innocence but yeah, you get the gist haha. Again, I really did like this though! :)






Butterflies should have been capitalized, oops! Simple typing error. Thank you :)



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Thu Jul 04, 2013 3:26 am
arianaSarroyo wrote a review...



Hello there. :-) I have to say, this is VERY short. However, in the few words you have posted there is a meaning. I would like to possibly read more, but if this is what you want, that is okay. I agree overall with the premise of the poem. In addition, the way it is written is simple, but sweet. Because this is so short, I thoroughly enjoyed reading the entire thing. My only hopes are for a bit more because I truly did love what you have here. :)






It is VERY short! I am sorry to say that there is not more to this poem, just a story and this one, short, sentence. Thank you :)



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Thu Jul 04, 2013 3:23 am
Willard wrote a review...



Very short. I never got the jist in this. I always think something comedic/dark when a piece first comes in mind. This is what I took from it
Butterflies (The good feeling you get from something, particularly someone you are attracted to),
from kisses stolen (The other person in the relationship who ended up cheating you),
disappears (The feeling is no longer there)
like the age of
innocence (There is no such thing as innocence anymore)
I like it.*Not bad claps*
6.2 out of ten




sbitonti says...


Hey, that's good. I wouldn't have connected the reference between kisses stolen and cheating on someone, even though it is the most obvious one and I should have. haha





I am very pleased at your interpretation, though it was not exactly what I had in mind when I wrote it. (However, isn't that what poetry is about? Interpreting it into your own conclusions?) I was in an abusive relationship for many years, yet I was the only one that didn't see it that way until the end. That is why the butterflies were there in the beginning, then they disappeared, along with the innocence of young love and naivety, as the relationship went downhill.



Willard says...


-Thumbs up-



Willard says...


Well, I liked it. I would say good job making a poem out of personal experiences. Not GOOD personal experiences, but the poem



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Thu Jul 04, 2013 2:47 am
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scotty.knows wrote a review...



Takes me far back to ages before.

It does seem as I get older that the sweet moments from my youth start to lose their color in a pallor of cynicism.

Maybe that's why I'm such a fan of alt art but you really seem to make evident the poignancy of the innocence lost.

I wouldn't say the age of innocence disappears as much as it fades into the gloomy, better-informed hues of the present Kind of like changing the lenses on a camera.

I like the shortness; it highlights the vivid parts and leaves little for misinterpretation.






Thank you for your review! I enjoy short poetry, as it tends to get the point across without being too blatant. A person's - especially a child or a teen's - innocence can fade away with time, or can be ripped away from them in a single event.




"Everything you can imagine is real."
— Pablo Picasso