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16+ Violence

The Prime Control Chapter 1 Part 2: The Control

by keeperofgaming

Warning: This work has been rated 16+ for violence.

“Why did you do that?”

We were back in my flat which was magically restored. I was slightly confused by Taurael’s actions.

She whispered.

“Because I don’t want you to die because I’m too selfish to contract to you.”

I retorted.

“But it was only because I was too selfish to call you something like Wings that we were in that mess in the first place.”

“Oh, please, Lefaye was going to make us contract the moment she realized that you heard us. I’m like a doll to her, she doesn’t like anyone else playing with me.”

“But she seemed like she genuinely wanted Mal- um the pixie guy to take you back.”

“Please, she may put on a pretty smile, but she’s rotten to the roots. That spriggan only did that to give me the message that she’s the only one who’d tolerate me.”

“I don’t know who wouldn’t, it doesn't seem hard.”

She blinked, then flushed again.

“Sorry, did I say something wrong?”

“N-no, it’s just.”

She reached out and patted my shoulder, then we both froze. A snap of magic was felt, like my essence was reaching for her mind.



She froze. Her body was entirely unable to move, she plopped into my hands as I looked at her in shock. I hadn’t used her name once. How…

She seemed to reach the same conclusion as I did, this had nothing to do with names.

“Okay, if I release you, could you not tell Morgan… oh, and you can nod or shake your head.”

She nodded.

“Um okay, how do I do this? Release?”

The she leapt up and hovered.

“Okay, now what was that?”

“I don’t know, I just… controlled you, but I didn’t want to.”

She sighed.

“Yeah yeah, I get it. Though it’s odd that it worked just like a name order.”

“What do you mean?”

“I just did it, but I was still my own person.”


“Wanna try it again?”


“I mean, I was told to discover what magic you gained, so we should probably test it with someone who has a strong will, like myself, and… check… the limitations.”

She turned minorly red.

“Oh, so like see how many circles you would fly until the thing broke.”


“Well, from the looks of it the control disregarded the danger of falling.”


“I want to test how much danger it will disregard.”

Oddly enough, she seemed disappointed.

“That’s… actually a good test.”

“Okay, is there a way to activate it?”

“Maybe just say what it is?”

“Like this? Control.”

Then she stopped, then Taurael looked up at me with glowing white eyes and smiled stupidly.

“What is it you need, master?”


“I would do anything for you… anything indeed.”

Then she shoved me down to the floor with a surprising strength for her size and laid out on my chest, her fingers making mini circles as she kicked her legs in the air.

“Uh, crap I think that was too much strength. Release.”

Her eyes went back to normal. Then she blinked and stopped.

“Um… what am I doing?”

“How the heck should I know?”

“What weird things did you order me to do?!”

She looked at me with suspicion and a heavy blush.

“You got to believe me; all I did was enable the power then that happened.”


“So… I got one facet that makes someone fully loyal to me?”

“That’s a terrifying concept.”

“Yeah, let’s take a break.”

“No, continue, but try a different keyword.”

“Okay? Hm… Suggest.”

Then her eyes glowed a dimmer white.

“Okay, Taurael, are you okay?”

“Yes, William.”

“Okay, good. Can I ask you a question?”


“… Okay… anything?”


“Right… test limitations. What’s a question that she normally wouldn’t answer but doesn’t pry too much?”

“My reason for hating Morgan.”

“Um, thanks. Why do you hate her?”

“Because she’s actually the one who killed my parents.”

“… what?”

“She didn’t do it directly, but she sent a beast to kill them, then in order to cover her tracks she pinned it on me.”

“Why do you think it was her?”

“Because there is no other explanation, I didn’t do it, Malkek certainly didn’t. No one in the kingdom would. The other councilors loved my mother’s council, she was very close to being elected as the new leader of the council when she was suddenly conveniently killed by her daughter. Who else gains from that but Morgan?”

That made a lot of sense.

“Are you being truthful.”


Hm… what other question could I ask?

“How do you feel about me?”

“I love you.”

“… heh? Why?!”

“Because you saved my life.”

“How did I save your life?”

“Three things. First, you told me to come with you instead of leaving me to fight the demon so you could escape. Second, you took a risk and yelled at my brother, even if you didn’t know he’d hear you, you still did it. And third, you were willing to die instead of doing something that I would find uncomfortable.”

“How did that save your life?”

“Because I was planning to enter Morgan’s room while she was sleeping and Eclipse.”

“What does that mean?”

“Eclipsing is when a fey takes all of their magic and condenses it until they explode.”

“So… you planned to kill her and yourself?”

She nodded.


“Because no one in this loves me. I am seen as a monster, even my own brother rejects me and won’t listen to a word I say.”

Tears began to drip from the glowing eyes.

“Don’t worry. I’ll be your friend.”

Then she smiled.


“Yes, tell you what, let’s be more open so that we can solve more problems.”

“I agree.”

I felt the slighted twinge of power leaving me. Then she hugged me.

I sorta stood there for a second.


She was back.

“Why am I hugging you?”

“… don’t you remember the whole conversation we just had?”


“Well, I uh… we decided to be friends and be more open with each other.”

“… now that you mention it, I do somewhat trust you more. Could it be that… what was the word you used?”


“Okay, could it be that control makes them fiercely loyal, and suggest makes them able to be suggested new behaviors for outside your power.”



“Are you going to report this to Mor-“

“She doesn’t need to know, but she’s not dumb enough to assume that projection is your only power, so we need to find another one, luckily she hasn’t given us a time limit, so we can relax. Do you have anything to do?”


I checked my laptop.

“I start college tomorrow.”

She blinked in confusion.

“What’s Call ledge?”

“It’s a place where adults go to learn extra things to place them better in actual jobs.”

“Huh, weird.”

“I suppose, but anyways, we should get some sleep… speaking of…”


I looked around, there was only one bed and that certainly wasn’t happening.

“Where are you going to sleep?”

She thought for a moment.

“Do you have a heater?”


“Are you sure?”

She was sprawled out on top of the space heater I brought from Gramp’s place.

“Yeah, it’s fine.”

“Alright, I just don’t want to wake up with Taurael- well done.”

She snickered.

“Pixies are incredibly heat resistant, if I was tossed into a volcano, it’d be a nice bath to me.”


“Yes, really.”


I went to my bed and lay down before falling asleep instantly. It seemed using my power took a lot of energy.


“Welcome to orientation. I am your principal, Mrs. Jones, and my daughter Cherry Jones, is starting her first year, too.”

She smiled, her blond hair, untied and flowing down her back. She walked like the wind, unfiltered grace.

Her daughter, on the other hand, was solely focused on her phone, yet it was clear to anyone with martial knowledge, she was without openings. Her stance was balanced and her hands were in a perfect to flip out to take down anyone. Her walk was more like a shadow, like a beast that needed taming.

She walked up to me.

“You, I get an odd feeling about you, try anything and you will regret it.”

“I understand.”

She nodded, a recognizing of what little skill I had.

“A martial artist?”


“Well, keep your eyes out, this town isn’t as peaceful as the brochures make it out to be.”

Cherry walked off, her eyes never leaving her phone.

“She’s scary.”

“I suppose you were right.”

“Hmm? Oh, of course I was right.”

I remembered the conversation we had last night.

She claimed that those without magic couldn’t see her, of course it never seemed to cross her mind that that meant that I had magic before Morgan gave me a piece of hers.

Now confirmed with Cherry, I was thinking more about what Morgan said, and how much was a lie.

“Alright everyone, you are now getting your schedules.”

A man handed me my schedule, and I started heading to my class.

Then I bumped into someone. At least, that’s what I think I did, as it felt like a freight train ran straight into me.

“Oh, my goodness. Are you okay?”

“Yep… I’m fine.”

“Oh, goodness. I didn’t mean to run into you.”

“You’re good.”

She helped me up. Then she blinked, before whispering.

“What kind of fey are you?”


“Don’t play dumb, your ***** of Morgan is failing to hide.”

I blinked… what? Who did she call… Did she call…

“What did you just call her?”

“Yo, calm down, I didn’t mean offense, she’s just known to be fully loyal to Morgan, so excuse me for not being cordial, so, spill it, what are you?”

“I’m a human, believe it or not.”

The girl raised her brow.

“And I’m a demon, be serious.”

Taurael peeked out from my hair.

“He is serious, he is human.”

“Then why would Morgan send her little killer to watch over a human.”

“I don’t know… what are you?”

“I am an earth golem.”

I blinked.

“You… don’t look very golemy…”

She looked kind of surprised.

“Goodness, he actually is a human. Golems don’t have a defined look idiot. We are as diverse as the flora on this planet.”

“Sorry, I didn’t know that. What’s your name?”

“Yours first.”

I did understand that names meant more than just a silly exchange to some fey, so I went along with it.



Grace, despite being an earth golem, was quite pretty, with auburn hair and golden flecked brown eyes.

“So, you gonna stare or can I get to class.”

“Oh, sorry, I just make sure I can match faces to names.”

“Yeah yeah, make your excuses.”

She stomped off.

Taurael whispered in my ear.

“That was a bad excuse.”

“Especially since it wasn’t an excuse, that’s exactly what I was doing.”


“Yep, I analyze everything and everyone, that’s why Cherry confronted me, she noticed.”

I always did it since I was five years old.


“We’re here.”

I walked into my class.

No one I knew was there, but there was one girl who seemed to be rich. She had a heavy coat wrapped around her chair that put Cruella’s to shame. She had black hair and blue eyes. The thing that sold the whole thing was the 101 Dalmatians t-shirt she had on.

Her hair was done up well, and she seemed well put together. She stood up on seeing me.

“Oh, you must be a new kid.”

I blinked.

“Aren’t we all new kids?”

“Wait, are you a freshy?”

“Yes, aren’t you?”

“Nah, I’m a junior. Are you in the wrong class?”

I looked at the door and my schedule.

“Nope, unless there are two 236Bs.”

“Nope, you are in the right class. How’d you manage to get this one?”

“I didn’t realize I was taking a junior class.”

“Especially in mathematics, worst subject in the world.”

I nodded in agreement.

I, of course, was really good with math, but I hated it.

Someone near the top row started laughing.

“Hey, who let the peasant in here.”

“Quiet Brent, based on him being a freshy in a junior class he probably got a full ride.”

Brent was a tallish guy with a nice shirt and jeans. His shoes were name brand, so likely overpriced.

“Actually, my gramps paid for my tuition.”

The girl smiled.

“Oh, cool.”

“Then your gramps should have gotten you better clothes.”

“My gramps isn’t big on fancy… or money.”

Then Brent gave a look of confusion.

“How could he send you here if he isn’t big on money?”

“Because he’s rich, he just doesn't care to be.”

“Nice, I’m the same way.”

Me and the girl gave him the same unconvinced look.

“Yeah, sure. By the way, I’m Amy.”


We shook hands and I found my seat.

Then the professor came in and immediately began writing.

Several of the students started looking concerned, but he kept writing.

Then he finished the equation.

“Now, one of you, solve it. How about you, freshman that they thought could handle my class.”

“Alright, sir.”

As I walked down, I heard Amy whisper.

“Don’t worry, he does this every year.”

Oh boy, they were in for a surprise.

I walked up to the board and began writing. The equation leveled into my mind and I broke it apart. The numbers went swirling as 7 equations formed at once. I wrote down my calculations, and the professor looked at it in surprise.

“No way.”

I put down the chalk and returned to my seat.

“That… is correct.”

I smiled as everyone looked at me in shock. One of the other kids murmured.

“So, that’s how he got in this class.”


“So, you’re some kind of genius?”

“Nope, I just know math.”

Me and Taurael were eating lunch. I packed a mini lunch for her.

“Please, you shocked even the teacher, I bet that even he didn’t know how to solve it.”

“Maybe… I’ve just always been able to calculate quickly.”

“Yeah, that was ridiculous, it was like your mind stretched through several possibilities in a second.”

I smiled. Then Brent came over.

“Hey, genius, you talking to some sort of doll?”

I blinked, Taurael blinked.

“You can see me?”

“Wait, oh is that a fey? Probably a pixie now that I think of it.”

I looked at him.

“You’re a fey?”

“Oh, heavens no, I’m a human, I just have a relic that allows me to see fey. This necklace I got from my granny.”

“Huh, same, but I don’t have a relic.”

He blinked.

“But… that would mean you have magic; humans don’t have magic. We can only utilize magic through relics.”

“He was hurt so my lady restored him, imbuing him with some of her magic.”

“Oh, that makes more sense.”

“Except I don’t think that that’s all.”

Both of them looked at me with raised brows, so I continued.

“Because I saw… Wings, before I was injured.”


“Knowing a pixie’s name gives you control over them, so I don’t want to use her name in public.”

“Oh, cool.”

Then Taurael nodded.

“You did see me, didn’t you. That means that you have magic of your own.”

“Yep… but how?”

“Could that magic… be yours?”

“No, something that strong would have to have come from Morgan.”

Brent spun towards me.

“Wait, you met Lefaye herself?”

“Yep, she’s kind of spooky.”

“Kind of is an understatement, the group I work for has her as enemy number one.”

“You work for an anti-Morgan group?”

“Yeah, more anti-fey, but we do have some contacts in the fey. Really just anti bad fey.”


Then Taurael spoke up.

“This is cool and all, but William, it has to be your magic not hers.”


“Because if Lefaye had a power like that, then she would utilize it endlessly, she would be a lot stronger than she is.”

“Just out of curiosity, what magic does William have?”

“I… would rather not say.”

“I understand, but do be careful, if you have magic, my group will watch you, and if they deem you as a threat… well, I think you can figure out that much.”

I sighed.

“Great, I’ve received two death threats in two days.”

“Three, the demon that hurt you also administered one when I saved you.”

I sighed.


Brent looked apologetic before walking away.

Of course, this is where Grace showed up.

“So, a human with a powerful magic that he’s hiding from Lefaye, eh?”

“How much did you hear?”

“Oh, everything, golems have good hearing, of course I was already aware of Brent, but to think that you know the murderer’s name.”

“She isn’t a murderer.”

“Oh, please, you believe her lies?”

“I have confirmed it.”

“Wow, you somehow verified something that has been a contested council issue for 50 years.”

“Yes, it has to do with my magic.”

“Yuh-huh. I bet. Your secret magic that you can’t show anyone, tell you what, I’ll believe you if you show me.”

“Well, meet me after school then, it’s best to do it privately as it’s not exactly subtle.”

“Sure, why not, oh and to warn you not to try anything.”

She slightly pressed down on the table and then walked off, leaving an indent where she pushed.

“Wings… remind me not to tick her off.”

“Got it.”

Both of us were quite pale.


The rest of the day went normally.

Then, after school, it was time to meet Grace.

She was in an alley.

“Why here?”

“So, you can do what you need to without prying eyes, and if you try something, I can squish you and it’ll take a while before they find the body.”


I squeaked that more than actually saying it.

“Well, show this magic.”

“Okay. Suggest.”

Then Grace’s eyes fluttered and her eyes began to glow white.

She began to slowly sway, but I felt some strain. Her will was greater than Taurael’s.

“What the heck? Is that what I looked like?”

I nodded.

“Grace, listen to me. You understand that I want to keep it secret, thus you will keep my power from everyone.”

She shivered in resistance but nodded.

“You feel as though you can trust me, and you will be slightly more open with me.”

Her will lashed at that, giving me a massive headache, but it was accepted, nonetheless.


She stopped swaying and looked at me.

“So, what’s the magic?”

“It’s a level of mind control.”

“Hm, that makes sense. I now understand why you wouldn’t want to trust people with that knowledge, don’t worry, I’ll keep the secret, you can trust me.”

She smiled before walking off.

Taurael looked at me in shock.

“Wow, that is insanely powerful. You could just control someone like that… Even an earth golem.”

“What, is that odd?”

“Atronachs have insanely strong wills due to their form of reproduction.”

“Which is?”

“Major natural events, for example, a volcanic eruption could spawn a fire atronach. Tsunamis spawn water, so on so forth.”

“So, I bet that they are uncommon.”

“Oh, absolutely, even with the events they are still rare to spawn in them, even then, most die in the event they form in, but for the rare survivors like Grace, they inherit the will of the storm, a supposed unbreakable willpower, but you simply said a word then she was yours to command.”

I sighed.

“Well, it was actually quite a struggle.”

“Really? Didn’t look like it.”

“Yeah, making her trust me made her nearly break out, and gave me a bad headache.”

“Huh, so there are limits.”

“Yeah, it seems that less intuitive things go down a lot harder.”

“Well, you think you got any other powers?”

“Not that I can tell.”

“Well, as of now we should train your will.”

“Good idea.”

Is this a review?



User avatar
1151 Reviews

Points: 198
Reviews: 1151

Fri Apr 26, 2024 2:38 pm
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vampricone6783 wrote a review...

Hello there, human! I'm reviewing using the YWS S'more Method today!

Shalt we commence with the review?

Top Graham Cracker - William has gotten more power by controlling Taurael without using her name, Grace had slightly been controlled by William, and Brent is against all fairies…

Slightly Burnt Marshmallow - Nothing much here, I’m just excited to see William’s willpower develop.

Chocolate Bar - It’s cute that Taurael loves William! He was the only one who had faith in her even when the council thought otherwise. I hope that they don’t ever have to break apart, but of course, not everything will be alright…

Closing Graham Cracker - William and Taurael have developed a closer bond, Morgan waits to fight, and Grace may or may not be a friend, but at least she’s not too much of a threat…

I wish you a fantastic day/night!

keeperofgaming says...

Minor question, you've already read these, so why are you suddenly going back and reviewing them?

vampricone6783 says...

This is part 2. I reviewed part 1, now I%u2019m reviewing part 2.

vampricone6783 says...

If you don%u2019t want me to review part 2 then I won%u2019t.

keeperofgaming says...

No, I'm good with it, I was just kind of confused why you are reviewing them separately.

User avatar
369 Reviews

Points: 75415
Reviews: 369

Mon Apr 01, 2024 3:54 pm
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RavenAkuma wrote a review...

Hello Again, My Friend!

It's me, Raven! And no, nothing is different on this day, I avoca-don't know what you're talking about!

Spoiler! :
The puns are so cringe but I can't stop, help me XD

So, anyway...I'd like to *finally* review the next chapter in this great story using my Familiar method! Let's dive in, shall we? Heh heh heh...

Testing Ripeness...

There was a lot of great stuff revealed in this chapter! Taurael's backstory and the reason she's at odds with Morgan, very interesting, and it's sweet that William is so empathetic to her and trying to be a good companion. It was also great to see them picking out the not-quite-human faces in the crowd. And of course, the elements of magic and worldbuilding were on-point! Let's get into the details though.

The Pit...

No recommendation for content! I very much enjoyed all the new information we gleaned from these characters, and the blooming friendship that seems to be happening between Taurael and William. There was just one line I picked up on as I was reading, here:

“Then why would Morgan send her little killer to watch over a human.”

Just a missing question mark, very minor thing. Great writing job! ~

Green Goodness!

Ah, where to begin for highlights?

So, as I mentioned, William and Taurael's interaction and testing of his magic was done very well and was great to read. I enjoyed her backstory thoroughly, and the way you framed the tragedy:

“Because there is no other explanation, I didn’t do it, Malkek certainly didn’t. No one in the kingdom would. The other councilors loved my mother’s council, she was very close to being elected as the new leader of the council when she was suddenly conveniently killed by her daughter. Who else gains from that but Morgan?”

This feels like it's very detailed, and shows that Taurael has -understandably- put a lot of thought into this. At the same time, there is an element of uncertainty that leaves room for possibility, to keep the reader curious and guessing. Very nicely done there, big props for that ~

The introductions for the new characters were all great, you showed their personalities right off the bat. Grace and Brent were definitely points of interest for obvious reasons; at first, BRent just gave me "bully-jock" vibes, but it definitely sounds like he could be more dangerous than that even! Likewise, though this seems very minor, I like how you made the earth golem have a stubborn personality; that feels like an "earth elemental" trait.

Ah, and speaking of Grace, two things. One, this:

“Major natural events, for example, a volcanic eruption could spawn a fire atronach. Tsunamis spawn water, so on so forth.”

Fascinating bit of worldbuilding! Felt very unique, and it certainly tells me that atronachs have a lot of power. The second thing is actually William using his mind-control power on her. That was awesome! This ability and its potential already have me interested.

The Final Guac...

Overall, this chapter was awesome! Nicely done!

Spoiler! :
And to clarify, YWS is doing what I believe is an April Fools thing, hence the "veggie takeover" happening today XD The normal profile pic and review format will be back tomorrow.


keeperofgaming says...

Thanks for the review and explanation.

rule #1 of being a potato: potatoes gotta defend their friends from negative self-talk
— Spearmint