"Drink, Queen, Drink." a blank voice barked.
Drinmeeca cringed as the cold water was poured down her throat. She instantly began coughing once the water had filled up her throat and mouth. She looked around and saw Mildred standing there with a pitcher and glass of water. Mildred was about to pour down more when Percius strolled into the room. Drinmeeca stood there, still frozen. Percius waved Mildred away and sat by Drinmeeca's chair. He reached out his hand, touching her cheek tenderly.
"Oh, how I love you, my queen." he cooed.
Drinmeeca shut her eyes and tears formed, trickling down her cleansed face. She opened her eyes and slapped away his hand. She turned around, not wanting to speak with him. Drinmeeca could feel his sadness and concern for her, but she did not want anything to do with this man. She crossed her arms, crying silently. She heard Percius sigh and walk away. Drinmeeca turned back to lay on her chair, still crying.
"Why did it have to be me? What did I do to deserve such a punishment?! I'm a mere child and here, they make me queen!! Lord help me!" Drinmeeca ranted.
She slid to the ground, sobbing. Drinmeeca tore off her crown and jewlery and wept. She shouted aloud to her God and continued crying, "Why me? Why me?" She banged her fists on the white marble ground. She tore off her sandals and ran around in her prison, screaming, "Why did it have to be me, God?" Drinmeeca picked up her long dress and ran around madly.
Tired out, she slipped to the ground again and began to cry. She hugged herself and cried. She looked up at the painting of the sky sadly, as if nothing in the world could make her smile ever again. Drinmeeca huddled against the wall and draped the dress around her shoulders like a blanket and slept...
Drinmeeca groaned as she felt another icy touch on her cheek. She shivered as Percius pulled her up, hugging her with his pathetic love. She opened her eyes to see the painting of the sky, streaked with a mix of blue and white. Percius let her go, grasping her hand and leading her to their throne. He smiled as she sat down as if she were his pet and he, the owner. Drinmeeca stared at the painting, as if it had some significance to it. She had a sudden urge to touch it, to feel the wispy clouds in her hands, to feel the wind blowing her hair.
She hugged herself, telling herself that she couldn't, that she was trapped in the Robot World. Drinmeeca stared at the sky again. She almost started crying, but didn't, for fear of the evil Percius. She promised herself that she would get out, someway or the other. Tolomeer would come with her too. How could she escape when there were no doors? All the doors seemed to disappear when someone walked out of them.
Drinmeeca yearned for her mother. She yearned for her home, the sweet smell of honey bread in the morning. She yearned for the wind to blow her away. Most of all, Drinmeeca yearned to be free.
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
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Hello! I'm back for another chapter!
Why not? He's a fellow human, he's trying to be nice to her, so why is she pushing him away? She's letting the robots take more care of her than him, which still doesn't make sense to me. Granted, yes, he was thoroughly creepifying in the last chapter, but there's no mention of it here. Here, he seems to be a nice guy. What changed?
She seems to be more concerned with the fact that they made her queen than that they've kidnapped her and are apparently holding her against her will. I mean, it seems like escape and living would be her first priorities, rather than angsting about the fact that she now apparently has to maintain a queenly status. It seems like actually trying to be a good queen would be last on her list.
Aaaand, now he's back to creepifying. Seriously, why is he obsessed with her so quickly? Is he desperate for human contact? Why don't they talk about this, rather than her pulling away all the time.
I haven't seen him do anything outright evil. Sure, he's pushy and creepy, but again, he could just be really desperate for human companionship and just incredibly socially awkward. I need proof that he's evil, as opposed to Meeca's assumptions.
Slooooow down a little! Let us see these characters interacting, not just crying about their fate! I want to know what's going on with this world, with Percius, with the robots. Take your time and explain things. Right now, I don't know what's going on, so I don't really care about anyone's problems. I need information!
Again, drop me a line if you have any questions/comments!
~GryphonFledgling
sure! I love the first chapter anyways. So yes, I will review, ON REVIEW DAY!!!!
~Kat
#0000FF ">Another great chapter, though I really wish it would've been longer because I'm still so anxious as to what happens next. Lol. If you get some time in, I'd really appreciate if you could read my poems. I think you'd like them and of course, review them please!(:
#FF0000 ">~Faith(: