I looked at the sunset,
All purple and red.
I thought out loud,
"The painter I must meet!
For the artist uses colors
or every tint and shade,
to paint the perfect sunset
on their canvas every night.
I looked up at the sunset,
an then I looked around.
Not an object in sight
had such beauty or was so bright.
The artist must be gifted,
to paint a sunset every night,
not repeating but always changing
the patters of the lights.
I looked up at the sunset
as it sank out of view.
But the stars came out and shined quite bright.
"How many stars are there?"
I said to myself,
"I cannot count them all!"
But then I realized there were many for a reason,
the same reason the sunsets each day.
I realized that it's to keep us,
keep us from knowing all there is.
For if we humans did,
there would be no point in science
Or math, or even art if we knew all.
The painter I must meet.
When I do the number of the stars,
that will be revezled.
When I meet the painter
I'll be standing at the gates.
At the gates of heaven bright as day.
If I go in I'll meet the painter.
But if I don't, I'll still wonder.
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125,029 Literary Works • 672,785 Reviews
yeah i was about to say the same thing as Misspriss but she beat me to it.
Good job, you should write more poetry
Poetry is not really my thing, however, I can correct your spelling and grammar. Also, this poem was good, as far as I know.
I looked up at the sunset
as it sank out of veiw.
But the stars came out and shined queit bright.
"How many stars are there?"
I said to myself,
"I cannot count them all!"
But then I realised there were many for a reason,
the same reason the sunsets each day.
veiw=view
queit=quite
realised=realized
I realised that it's to keep us,
keep us from knowing all there is.
For if we humans did,
there would be no point in science
Or math, or even art if we knew all.
realised=realized
The painter I must meet.
When I do the number of the stars,
that will be reveiled.
When I meet the pianter
I'll be satnding at the gates.
At the gates of heven bright as day.
If I go in I'll meet the painter.
But if I don't, I'll still wonder.
reveiled=revealed
pianter=painter
satnding=standing
heven=heaven
well dude umm this should be under another section of poetry. Its not lyric. Second, I have a bad headache right now so it didn't make sense. I'll read it later and post another comment.
Not sure if that worked. It lost the flow and beat the poem carried before hand.
This poem was neither good nor bad, I see where you are coming from and can see the meaning but It wasnt one I was necessarily interested in.
I looked up at the sunset
as it sank out of veiw.
But the stars came out and shined queit bright.
"How many stars are there?"
I said to myself,
"I cannot count them all!"
But then I realised there were many for a reason,
the same reason the sunsets each day.
I realised that it's to keep us,
keep us from knowing all there is.
For if we humans did,
there would be no point in science
Or math, or even art if we knew all.
The poem was good, but stanzas three and four seemed out of place. First when you started talking about the stars I thought you would go on about how lovely they where and how you must meet the painter. You didn't say any of that.
But then I realised there were many for a reason,
the same reason the sunsets each day.
What reason was that? Is it becuase they are so lovely?
Stanza four didn't fit at all. It had nothing about a painter or a sunset. (which to me seemed to be what the poem was about) It just stuck out like a sore thumb.
If you take out the fourth stanza and add something about the painter with the stars I think it would be better.
It's nice to see your work. In the thrird stanza is is "satrs" suposed to be stars? Other then that a very nice poem. Can't wait to see what else you cook up.