First off, really nice job on the poem. I enjoyed the idea that the speaker has no idea about their past. That they are only able to describe their memories as "ink black pictures" and "misconstrued features". That since they do not remember a single thing of the past, all they can do now is look towards the future. The thing is though, now when the speaker starts to look forward they have the same problem.
I think it would be really great if you elaborated, and went deeper into the poem because this is something you could really dig deep on. You could describe in different words what it looks like when they try to look forwards. What about their past is muddled, all of it, some of it? I think these are questions you could dive deeper into, but that's just my personal oppion, so you don't have to listen to it.
Overall you did a really good job it, I loved how you conveyed everything, but you could dig a little into it though. Can't' wait to read what you write next!
Carpe diem,
LUNARGIRL
Points: 10714
Reviews: 122
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