Warning: This work has been rated 16+ for language.
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125,018 Literary Works • 672,861 Reviews
I actually came back here because I was curious about the title, #1439 . What is the significance? It piques my curiosity.
no real significance. I just feel like I have so many in a day and this one I just happened to write down.
I absolutely love this poem. It uncovers the terrible truth that plagues so many young lives -- I have felt exactly this way and I can guarantee many of my friends have as well. It perfectly describes what its like to not be suicidal in a moment, but generally not want to live, yet living anyway for the sake of those around you.
It acknowledges every thought one should have and every thought one shouldn't, but still has anyway.
The formatting was a bit confusing to me, but I still enjoyed the poem.
The ending was perfect as well. An almost bittersweet ending where the narrator does not find happiness but rather a simple conclusion they already knew from the start: One that does not solve their feelings but rather redirects them as something that should be brushed to the side for the greater good, even if that "good" cannot be felt.
It's nice to know that someone gets it and I'm not so alone with my feelings. Thank you for the review!
Of course, my friend. Stay strong and stay here on earth for us.
EverLight here with a review. This review is not intended to offend or hurt you or make your novel or poem seem bad, but be warned- you may feel offended anyway
First Impression
This made me cry. This seriously made me cry. I'm glad to have found another poet that's for certain. This was beautiful.
Nitpicks & Grammar
Your good here
Style & Flow
Just one thing-when you say-and there are so many beings who would kill to be in my position, I would remove the and, and the word beings so it would read more like this-
Other then those issues, you did amazing. Keep up the good work!
EverLight Out
Hello again! Thank you for the review! I wasn't so sure about that line either and I'll definitely take your advice to heart. Thank you for the encouragement!