The Interview

It all starts with a hum. Though I can’t make out the song, it’s very familiar. Springsteen? Beatles? I don’t know. That’s all I’m hearing, breaking the silence in the elevator of a building I just got into. Yes, I am nervous I don’t know what to expect. The day hasn’t been nice to me so far and it’s only 10 a.m. Obviously I am prepared for the worse.

The humming stops.

“You’re going for the interview” she says suddenly. Very melodious voice. That accent, British? I’m not looking at her but I think it would be rude so I quickly turn around to face her.

“Um... Yes. Obviously” I say, trying as hard as I can to project my voice confidently, as I show her the tag pinned on my navy-blue blazer. It says ‘Candidates’ on the tag with some numbers. I stay silent,not knowing what to say, as always. Then I notice she’s wearing one too.

“You’re nervous, don’t lie.” she says with a little chuckle. “This job is very important.”

She’s undeniably cute, young and seems energetic. Her dirty blonde wavy hair is tied neatly behind in a chignon, with the big glasses and the little tiny mole on her cheek, she’s pretty. But she’s right, only one position and I am totally anxious right now.

“It’s normal. Nobody does this um... thing everyday.” I say.

She nods with her mouth pouting at the same time. I lift my head up to see which floor we are in. Damn, all these conversations and I still have 8 floors to go. I don’t like talking and she seems very condescending, it makes me feel more timid.

“Why do you choose this place?” she asks suddenly, after the 4 to 5 seconds of silence. Did she just ask me that question? You aren’t the interviewer stop interrogating me!

“Why do I wanna work here? Hmmm.” I say to fill the emptiness and hopefully to buy some time. It’s only 4 floors away! “I guess I just like the environment here. The.. Place is just... How do I say... Perfect for me.” I say, giving the slightest idea yet the best answer she will ever get from me. No. I don’t want to talk with you anymore. I clutch the files on my hand firmly. Please go faster, elevator.

“Define perfect.” she says with a chuckle, as if I said something funny.

I curse inwardly. Is she serious? I turn to the floor indicator and see that we’re only two floors away. I pretend like I didn’t hear her last question. I just don’t care anymore, not that I even care from the beginning. Talking too much tires me. Well, for my standard this is already too much.

Come on, 15th floor! In 3... 2... 1

Black.

What’s going on?

Oh no. Please not now. I run my hand clumsily on the buttons panel as I’m closer to it than her. She is somewhere behind me. She is worried I can tell, as she breathes heavily.

“Find the emergency button.” she says. Well that’s actually what I’m trying to do. It’s so dark I can’t even see any shades of gray in the darkness.

“Where is it?” I ask after rummaging through the buttons. I put my files on the elevator floor, now using both hands to find the button. Then, I hear her footsteps coming closer, very slowly. “Stay where you are. We need to be extra careful.” As much as I hate to say that, it’s really necessary in this situation. Wouldn’t want her to cause any more trouble.

“Don’t worry about me! Quick, find it!’ she yells.

I push all of the buttons that my hands come across with, hoping for something to happen. Suddenly, a bright white light shines from behind me. It must be from her phone. The sudden luminosity makes my eyes squint, then I can see clearly the tiny red button I’m looking for. I press the button immediately.

The emergency lamp in the elevator lights up. It’s dim but at least it helps us to see. I press the red button a few more times.

“How do we call for help?” I ask as I repeatedly push the button.

“Try holding it” she says. I do as she says, and the buzzer rings.

“Hello! We are trapped in the elevator can you send someone in?” she says loudly towards the button panel. She sigh as we wait for a reply.

Then, an indistinctive voice comes out from the speaker. It’s so grainy and makes very little sense to us.

“Excuse me?”

Then after a while we can finally hear a clear voice. “The building is out of power and we are so sorry. We will fix it as soon as we can.”

As soon as you can? Please do. Now the awkward situation just turns even more awkward. What did I do to deserve this? It’s just nothing goes right today. To be honest I woke up late this morning, missed an early train, and now this? It’s like a series of unfortunate events, tailored for me.

“Well I guess we just have to wait for them then?” she sighs. I nod a little.

The worst is yet come, I can tell. That’s all I’m thinking of. I hate conversation in general and this situation can be perilous. I can literally die from brain numbness in case like this. Hopefully, this will be over soon but judging by how things has been going so far, I highly doubt that.

She walks to the back part of the elevator. Then she sits. I turn my body to lean on the left side of the elevator, looking at random directions. I don’t really know how to react in this kind of situation.

They say time is relative, well I can approve that as I feel everything is slowing down. I took out my mobile phone, see if I can do anything with it. Classic. This is the best time to use it.

No reception. Perfect.

I open my camera rolls just so that I can pretend to have something to do, only to realize I haven’t been taking pictures for awhile and there are only a few embarrassing selfies, screenshots on how to self- improve and random motivational quotes. I hit the exit button. Offline games would be the most viable option right now.

Just as I scroll through the game section, she starts to hum again. The same song. I know this song but I can’t remember what. She keeps humming the catchy hook. You ever had that kind of feeling? As if the song is on the tip of your brain, you can sing along to it but you just don’t have the slightest idea what it is? I have to ask. It’s bugging me too much.

“What’s the song?” I ask suddenly. She looks surprised.

“AC/DC?” she says with an attitude, as if she’s annoyed. Say no more! I remember everything now, the thought flows like a river in my head it just feels so good to know, finally. Interesting how a girl, particularly that looks like her knows a hard rock band like that. It’s one the rare mellow blues-rock songs by AC/DC though, entitled ‘Ride on’.

“Thank you. You... Have a great taste in music.” I say nervously. She stays silent for a while.

“My dad loved the band and he always jammed that song in the car on the way to school back then.” she explains. I pause momentarily.

“Loved?” I ask. I’m just curious.

“Oh. Yeah, loved. He... He’s gone.” she says again, pouting her lips. I stay silent, only letting a sigh as a sign of sympathy. “This song always reminds me of him.” she continues as she reminisces even further down the memory lane, staring emptily at the floor.

“Ride On is such a good song.” I say. At this point, she isn’t that cold anymore. She’s like a very troubled woman and I feel sympathetic towards her.

“The lyrics and the meaning of that song, was really relatable to the situation he was in.” she adds.

I am the kind of the person who really dives into the lyrical quality of songs, so I know exactly what she’s talking about. The song basically talks a man reflecting on mistakes he has made in a relationship while drinking alcohol. I kind of have already figured out her story even before she tells me anything. But she seems sad, and very honest about it.

“It’s one of my favorite song from them.” I reassure, just to console and distract her a bit from the sad past she might be thinking about. I wish not to further talk on topic. “You don’t sound like you’re from around here. British?”

She burst into a short laughter, “No. Australia.” she corrects, “I get that a lot from people.”

“I’m so sorry. Well I guess I... Can’t really differentiate accent.” I state the obvious. “You moved here?”

“Just recently.” she replies briefly. I wanted to ask why but I have a feeling not to. I don’t wanna ask too much. “I’ve had some problems with my family.” she continues. I know she’s going to say more. This girl has issues.

“I’m Jesse by the way.” I say, to quickly change the topic.

“I’m Laura” Then she smiles at me. “You know, you probably have noticed I’m kind of outspoken, I’m sorry if it bothered you.”

“No, it’s okay. I just find it hard to talk to anybody.”

“Good for you. My potty mouth has caused me serious troubles before. Things I wish I didn’t say back then.” she pauses, “to my father...”. She is getting really emotional. I want to make her feel better but I just don’t know how.

“You know, whatever happens in the past stays right there. Don’t let it affect your future.” That’s the only thing I can think of.

“It’s hard you know.” her voice trembles. “Have you ever feel so sad before?”

“Of course I do, everyone has their own problems.” I state, once I figured out what to talk about. She turns to look at me, deeply in the eye. Underneath the the glasses, the mascara, and her azure-blue eyes, I can see pain and sadness.

“What happened Jesse?”

“Well, being a very quiet boy in elementary school, nobody understood me. I do everything on my own. But I think I was lucky that I’m smart. I needed none of their helps. I was bullied so badly that I wanted to leave school. But my parents never cared for me. So yeah, I carried on.” I smile at little bit.

“I wish I could be as strong as you.” she says.

“Why?”

“My teenage years... They were disastrous. I moved a lot at that time, as I was diagnosed with a severe addiction. Maybe I was influenced by my father. He was a drunkard and most of the time I saw my parents fight.”

Laura takes a deep breath before continuing. Clearly this isn’t easy for her as well.

“Back in Queensland, we had a tradition in our family. My mother used to bake Lamingtons for our birthdays.”

“I’m sorry. A what?”

She chuckles. “Lamingtons. It’s a delicious sponge cake coated in a layer of chocalate and desiccated coconuts. It’s a Queensland’s dish, super delicious and I was always excited to celebrate birthdays even if they weren’t mine.”

Her smile fades as she proceeds.

“On my mother’s birthday, when I was 15 I wanted to bake Lamingtons for her. I wanted to return the favor. I stayed up the whole night, reading cookbooks and studying. Then at 4 a.m in the morning, I sneaked out my bedroom, went to the kitchen and started baking. I was gonna present it to her by the morning and only God knows how excited I was. The finished cake was perfect, I couldn’t have done better. It’s smooth, with the right texture and also perfectly sweet. It was a hard work paid off. I decorated the table and even put the birthday card I made the other night.”

“After everything was ready, I went to wake them up in their rooms. I knocked but nobody answered. As I opened the door, I gasped.” she continues.

“There was blood everywhere; I couldn’t even scream due to the shock. It felt unreal even to this day. My dad was crying on the bed. Saying he was sorry, over and over again. I didn’t remember what happened next because I passed out. I will never forget how my mom’s life was taken so brutally by the person who was supposed to protect and love us. I felt betrayed. Mom’s death hammered me like a thunder to the ground, and kept me depressed for several years.”

Tears are gushing from her already swollen eyes.

“After that, I ran away from home, got addicted to alcohol at the age of 16, went back and forth to rehab. I was dying. They even diagnosed me with mental illness, but I know I wasn’t crazy. My father was always there beside me, taking care of me. But I never thanked him. I hated him so much, until he took his life away.”

“Laura, I feel sorry for you.” I say as she cries. I wrap my hands around her. “It’s over Laura, it’s over. You can look at the brighter side now, life must go on.” She is sobbing so loudly and I can feel everything she feels. I pat her back a few times.

“I wish I was dead, Jesse.”

“Laura stop. Let’s get out of here!” I say suddenly. I can’t let her weep anymore, I have to find way to stop this, but she can’t stop crying. Then I start to sing ‘Ride on’, the chorus, so loudly.

I’m lonely, I’m so lonely

But you know what I’m gonna do?

I’m gonna ride on, ride on

Standing on the edge of the road,

Thumbs in the air, change my evil way,

Till then I’ll just keep ridin’ on.

Between hiccups, she starts to sing too, and our voices are so out-of-tune and loud. She laughs in tears as we scream our hearts out to the song. After everything subsides, we wipe our tears off.

“It’s gonna be alright, Laura.” I coo.

I don’t know why but I feel it’s hard to breathe. Then I notice some smoke is entering the elevator. She coughs. I look up and I remember how every elevator has a small opening at the top.

“Laura, let’s get out of here.” I suggest. I jump and pushed the metal cover on top of the elevator. I pull myself up there and I’m on the top of the elevator with cables around me. Then suddenly, one of the lift door opens up. The light coming out is so bright I have to cover my eyes. Actually we are only that far away from reaching the 15th floor. We can just walk on top of the elevator straight to the lift door on the floor. This would have been easy had I known it earlier.

I go back inside. “Laura the electricity has returned. Let’s go this way. Or we’ll be late for the interview!” I suggest. But she is somehow reluctant. She sits there, with a murky face.

“Come on now, Laura!” I say, then I help her to stand up. I can never pull her out of this, not without her own efforts, but she just seems so not motivated to go out. “What’s wrong?”

She stays silent. “Jesse, I don’t wanna move on.”

“Wait, what? “Why not, Laura?!”

“I’m staying here. You failed, Jesse. You’re not getting the job.”

I’m perplexed. As I take a closer look at her tag pinned on her coat, I notice ‘Interviewer’ is written on it. What just happened? I’m sure she was wearing a different tag just now. All this time, I’ve been talking to the Interviewer? I didn’t see it coming, honestly.

“You can’t do that! I did everything I could to take you out!” I scream. She remains static, with tears gushing down her face.

“You are weak, with no self-confidence! A coward, and certainly not the dominant part of me!” Laura rages while she frowns.

What she just said strikes me hard. “At least I’m gonna keep you alive! You are always stuck in the past. You need someone like me to take you out!” I insist.

She stands up, reaches out and pulled something from behind her back, slowly.

A gun.

“Stop me now if you can.” she says as she clicks and points the gun to her head. I want to move but I can’t. My body won’t move. The light in the elevator flickers, the elevator begins to tremble. She’s right, I’m too weak and I failed the interview. I should have shown more courage and strength from the beginning.

Our eyes lock into each other.

“Laura. Don’t let it control you.” I say as my vision goes blur.

3.......2......1

She shuts her eyes. “ Goodbye.”

Then I hear the loud bang, as everything goes dark.

Laura was lying on the white bed. The room was cold and silent, only with white noise coming from the fan. She opened up her eyes and she could feel pain all over her body, and she felt weak. Her face was so skinny, eye bags under her eyes, dry lips, and pale face.

She tried to pull her arms, only to notice, she was tied to both sides of the bed. She began to pull as hard as she could. She couldn’t remember anything. She kicked, tossed and turned, screaming in frenzy.

“Let me go! Let me go!”

Nurses ran to her. “Relax!” One of them said, but to no avail. She was madly screaming and struggling to free herself.

“Call the doctor!” one of them said, as she injected a dose of benzodiazepines, a tranquilizer.

A young man was watching her, worried, from the outside through a glass screen. As one of the nurse went out, he stopped her.

“What happened to my sister?” he asked. “Can I see her now?”

“I’m sorry but no, sir. She’s still unstable.” The nurse said hastily. She paused to catch a breath, “She tried to kill herself this morning.”

He wasn’t surprised. Her sister has been mentally unstable for the past few years, and always had been in the mental institution. He pulled out his bag, kept the AC/DC records he was holding back into his bag. The song was the only thing that could calm her down after the tragic death of their parents.

Knowing it might take some timebefore he will be allowed to enter, he sat in front of the room. Queensland was cold at that time. He hugged himself to keep warm as he think about what really was happening to her sister all these years. He looked at the door of her sister’s room and some of the information written there.

Room 15

Laura Jesse Woolridge

Case: Dissociative Identity Disorder

People with split identity disorder never could really understand themselves. Neither does people around them. It’s a rare dissociative disorder in which two or more personalities with distinct memories and behavior patterns apparently exist in one individual.

Laura always wanted to sort and pick the best sides of her, to take her out from the mental prison, as depicted by the dark and confined elevator. Every now and then, she was able to meet with all her personalities at once, and ‘interview’ them for the important ‘job’ to take control of her body permanently. Jesse was one of her identity and he wasn’t strong enough. Thus the pessimistic, negative side of her always take control.

Just before Laura passed out from the drug they just gave her, she caught a glimpse of Jesse, standing at the corner of the ward, staring at her silently. He smiled, feeling relieved.

“Perhaps next time.” he said confidently.