Hey herb! This was an interesting piece, so I thought I'd leave a comment 
the man was used to the sun . . .
he was used to winter. The trouble was that he was without imagination
I actually interpreted these lines as conveying how the man didn't see beyond whatever his present circumstances were. If the sun was out, he thought he was used to the sun. If the sun was gone or if it was cold, he thought that's what he was used to - and so being "without imagination".
This, followed up with the line "it did not lead him to immortality" creates a sort of melancholy mood for me, with the implied tragedy of the man's existence, swayed by circumstance.
the possibilities of getting in a bit after dark was true, but the fire would be ready
I feel like "fire" is a bad thing in this context - since the man has the 'possibility' (hope, potential?) of coming home at a semi-reasonable hour, and then the poem contrasts the presence of the fire with this positive thing. That's interesting, since normally in winter fire would sound like a good thing, but maybe this fire also burns?
"lying against each cut" makes for a striking ending, I think.
It's also impressive how well the lines flow, given that you're creating them by cutting out words from the original extract.
Keep writing!
-Lim
Points: 41664
Reviews: 542
Donate