You might've noticed i'm posting lots of lyrics recently.
It's just i'm making some beats on the computer, and when i pluck up the courage i might record my lyrics in rap or song over the top!
xxx
Here's another...
Did you put me on your knee?
Hum a sweet melody,
Just to drift me off to sleep…
Or were you too busy?
All I ever wanted was a hug,
A little consolation,
Let me know that you loved me,
Just an honest declaration.
Well, I’ve been waiting fifteen years
For that support.
And she’s been waiting too long,
For that divorce court.
Whenever I think of you, I see the scars,
No rainbows or sunsets, that’s just who you are.
Oh, it’s a shame to say my daddy hurt my mummy,
But it’s true.
And if I weren’t writing it down,
I’d be hurting you.
Did you hold my hand?
Make castles in the sand?
Cure my short attention span…
Or was that never your plan?
All I ever needed was three words,
A bit of adoration,
Let me know that I was yours,
Put in some dedication.
Well, I’ve been waiting fifteen years
For you to need me,
And I’ve been waiting too long,
For you to see…
Whenever I think of you, I see the scars,
No rainbows or sunsets, that’s just who you are.
Oh, it’s a shame to say my daddy hurt my mummy,
But it’s true.
And if I weren’t writing it down,
I’d be hurting you.
Blood is thicker than water,
But that aint true.
I’ve got feelings for others,
That I’ll never possess for you.
I want to say goodbye,
Farewell, so long, adieu…
Because the Father in my head,
Well, it will never be you.
Whenever I think of you, I see the scars,
No rainbows or sunsets, that’s just who you are.
Oh, it’s a shame to say my daddy hurt my mummy,
But it’s true.
And if I weren’t writing it down,
I’d be hurting you.
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
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125,018 Literary Works • 672,861 Reviews
Hi!
I want to listen to this song with beats.
You wrote great song. There is a rhyme, there is a meaning. You express feelings of the lyrical character very well! Especially I liked chorus.
So, I wish you good ideas for your works
This is a good work!
Antonina.
I have never critqued lyrics before, but I just waned to tell you that I loved it! I think it would be a very well written and sang song. I would love to hear it with beats
This is my favorite part. very realistic and relatable
Awesome job
-tiffany