Chapter 1 ~ Moonlit Encounter

Chapter 1 ~ Moonlit Encounter

Somewhere in the darkened night, a light shone out, awakening me from a lethargic stupor.

What the crap? I looked around me at the desolated ruins, unsure of what to do. The light was a small point on the horizon, growing closer and brighter with every quiet moment in the calm countryside. As it grew closer, the light split in two.

Holy cats!! Headlights!! I knew in my panic that, at least, it wasn’t the police. If they were coming for me, if they knew who I was or what I was doing at the ruins of this house, they would be blaring sirens and flashing lights, giving me away. Split decisions ran through my head. Whoever this was, they weren’t coming here to grieve with me. Panic flew in my veins and I knew it was too late for me. Frantically, I tried my best to collect my things.

Don’t leave evidence, don’t leave evidence…

The headlights grew even closer, coming straight for me on the empty dirt road. I cried out in dread. I threw everything in my backpack and kicked the dirt around, trying to make it seem inconspicuous. Throwing the backpack over my shoulder, I dashed across the wasted plot of land and flew into the trees and cowered behind my favorite oak tree, stumbling and feeling in the darkness for the rung ladder that would take me to my childhood sanctuary. I felt the flashlight on my back through the vinyl of the heavy pack as I climbed, but if someone was truly coming, having a light in the darkness was not going to help my secrecy.

The dark car drove knowingly into the driveway, rattling the long-dormant gravel as it proceeded towards the ashes that were what used to be the safest place in the entire world . . . for me, at least. The engine sputtered and clicked off, leaving an echo that shouted towards the horizon, the silence following was deafening in comparison. I pleaded for my heart to be silent as I stooped on my knees, gazing out over the empty lot through the solitary window of the old tree house, watching the motionless car. My breath heaved and my knees—10 years of acorns, twigs and leaves painfully jutting into the worn fabric of my holey jeans—were loudly protesting in pain. My heart was pounding so loud in my ears, I was sure that the dangerous strangers could hear it.

The headlights flashed back on and I gasped. I bit my lip—hard—to keep from making any rash noise that would most definitely put me in a lot of trouble. Freaking out was probably not a good idea. As I held back my strangled, dry sobs of fear with my stern and protecting thoughts, both car doors were jerked open from the inside at the same time, causing me to jump. Like synchronized swimmers, both the passenger and driver stepped out of the vehicle in perfect, fluid movements, moving together like nothing else. There was no comparison to the beauty they displayed in motion, the tall figures joining together in front of the car, momentarily blocking the headlights that shone towards the woods to my far right then walking in sync towards the middle of the property, stopping together only when the stood in the exact center in the light of their car headlights.

They stood there, silently, as if waiting for something. They stood completely motionless while their idled car, engine now running softly, sat within sprinting distance from them, protecting them in a pool of light. They had left the doors wide open . . . for an easy get-a-way, maybe? Though I, myself, and the engine were making a lot of noise, but I could still hear them when one abruptly began to talk to someone who was obviously not with them.

“Come to take us up on our invitation, Tyro?”

Another voice came from the far left of me. “You wish. I’ll never join you.”

The one in the middle of the ruins who hadn’t spoken before scoffed. I could see a figure accompanied by a much, much smaller, more leaner person enter through the trees on the other side of the property, where I had heard the voice.

“Like we don’t know that. The offer is still available if you change your mind.”

“Hm” was their only reply. The new additions to the strange meeting entered the field of light and faltered, blinking in the newly bright atmosphere.

“I would offer to turn down the lights, but that’s quite impossible,” the first man spoke with a smirk.

“As if you would show any kindness to us.” The taller individual retorted with acid in his voice. Who were these people?

“Peace, dear Tyro. We have not gathered to start a fight with you. We just want to . . .” he paused, thinking. “Catch up.”

The more loquacious newcomer laughed darkly and stopped several feet from the others. My strategic mind was immediately thinking of the outcome to the fight that was obviously going to happen, no matter what either party promised. The smallest in the group was definitely the petite figure to the side of the man called “Tyro.” They were the underdogs. The men that had first come into the clearing had the advantage of a get-a-way, but what good would that do them if the others ran after them? Maybe they could get to the car first and run them over. I shuddered. I hoped internally that it didn’t come to a fight.

“So lets get right down to it,” began the second of the first pair of men.

“Yes, let’s. What you are doing is corrupt and malicious. It will destroy us all and must be stopped.” The leader of the underdogs went straight to the point. I wanted to whoop out and encourage them, as if this was a game, but I held my tongue.

“Ha ha,” the first man mocked. “Give us a good reason why.”

“I believe I just gave you two.”

A whip of anger slapped across the faces of the two men. I had a feeling that they were now the underdogs.

“Don’t get smart with us. We could end this right here and now. We could kill you both,” he flicked his chin towards the smaller of the two he was addressing. Their partner angled himself in front of them, pulling them behind him with his strong arm. “They would never miss you, would they? You would be just another pair lost on the field of a lost cause.” He mocked them in all seriousness. The small figure’s shadow quivered in the light.

“Scared, little girl?” the other man crooned condescendingly. I started, taken aback. There was a girl out there! My eyes bored into her figure. She was so skinny and petite, with shoulder-length yellow hair. How did I not see? She hadn’t spoken through the entire ordeal, but now she was outspoken in her built-up fury.

“I’m not scared of you, you hypocritical swine. I tremble—in fury—because I hate you! All of you; including my good-for-nothing whore mother and sisters. They ruined my life! They have ruined many lives, including the one that was ruined on this very soil!” My mouth popped open. Was she talking about me? “That poor girl that you left with nothing, who was forced to live in a living hell for the last decade! She could be anywhere right now!” Thank God they didn’t know where I was. “Lord knows, she may even be dead.” Her tone changed. It was deadly and threatening, making me, even though I was not who she was addressing, to quiver in fear. “You people deserve nothing more than to burn in hell and live only long enough to be tortured in the most inhumane ways possible.” She spat at their feet from behind the strong arm that had gone from protecting her to holding her back.

“Quite a mouth there, eh? Well, I bet you children have a curfew to keep. Run along home now before we do anything we might regret.” The first man went back onto the offensive side. “We have some work to do.” The man and woman sneered but backed away slowly. The second man chuckled.

Everyone was now backing away, not losing eye contact with the enemy. I held my breath. It wasn’t over. The men got to the car before the others got to the trees. They smirked and got in, the driver snapping off the lights, leaving the other two, who had stopped several feet from the tree line, and me in complete darkness. Their faces shone in a ghostly pale way as the dashboard lights shone on their light-skinned complexions. They drove away without a second glance. Several minutes later, a thick voice to my left startled me.

“They will return.”

“If they do, I will strangle them,” threatened the girl. Again, I shuddered, imagining her tiny hands around the beefy men’s’ necks.

“Calm down, Rachel. Leave the fighting to the Force Agents,” Tyro soothed.

“But will we be strong enough?”

“One can only hope.” I swallowed the lump building in my throat. His words sent icy veins of terror through my spine. They weren’t going to be strong enough. Hope was all they had. I let out a small cry of terror.

There was a swift noise from the left.

“Did you hear that?” the girl, Rachel, demanded.

“Yeah, but it was probably an animal.”

“No,” the quivers in her voice seemed as if she were shaking her head furiously. “There have been no other animals. The weather has them all hiding in silence. Besides, this was not a noise and animal would make.” I was scared stiff. Should I pop out and turn myself in? Hello, sorry to disturb you. And I so didn’t mean to hear every bit of your conversation with those men just now. Yeah, sorry, I’ll just be on my way. . . That wouldn’t work.

The girl took a step in my direction.

What do I do, what do I do, what do I do?

I didn’t have to do anything. The strange man, Tyro, saved me.

“Rachel . . . you’re being paranoid. We don’t have time for this! Come on!”

“Fine.” They began walking again towards the woods, swiftly but silently.

My knees were screaming in pain. I fell to my side, leaning against the window pane. Suddenly, there was a loud ripping noise. I screamed and curled into a ball. The sound of the motorcycle engine ripped through the cool night air and ripped apart the silence like a chainsaw ripping through a malleable material, tearing it apart easily. The echoing tear reverberated through the night again and again as the motorcycle, and its passenger, turned their backs on the ruins of my childhood.

Oh . . . my . . . God . . . What just happened?

I was gasping for air as if I had been holding my breath through the entire ordeal. For all I knew, I probably had. I was crying. Is that such a silly thing to do when I might have died just then? No, because if it was you, you would have been crying too. I sat up after what seemed like eons of lying on the moist, uncomfortable ground and wiped my eyes of the sticky moisture, sniffling and gasping.

I picked up my backpack and scrambled my way along the side wall of the tree house to the doorway. I slowly made my way down the ladder and turned to see that someone was waiting for me at the bottom.

I screamed.

“Shh, shh, shh!” Rachel clamped her hand over my mouth. “We’ll be heard. I’m not here to hurt you, I swear.” I was crying again. This was end and I knew it. As if they could read my thoughts, I began my eulogy to my dead parents and little brother, where their grave was just feet away. Daddy, Mommy, I love you. Jack, even though I never really acted like I liked you, I really did, and I’ve missed you every day since you left me. Hopefully, I’ll be where you are when this Rachel girl is through with me . . . I love you. I shut my eyes and prepared for the worst.

“Listen to me, Deborah,” Oh my God, she knew my name. “You have to trust me. I know what you’ve been through and I know that you haven’t had it in you to trust anyone for about 10 years, but you have to trust me. I can help you.” No, I can’t . . . I can’t trust anybody!! I wanted to scream again, but I knew it would be useless with her small hand clamped forcefully on my mouth.

“If I let you go, will you scream again?” There was no use trying to get away or call for help. There was no one for miles all around. I shook my head weakly. “Good.”

She let go of my mouth slowly, ready to cover it again if I tried to scream.

“Who are you and how do you know my name?” I asked tentatively in a small voice. She laughed.

“Everyone in my agency knows your name and your story. We probably know it better than you do yourself. Take a seat.” Rachel took her own advice and sat down with her back against the tree across from me. “Seriously, I’m not going to hurt you.”

I sat down as far away from her as was possible, leaving a good 8 feet between us. I knew that from when I had wanted to hang a hammock between these same two trees we sat against, only to be saddened by the fact that they were a foot too far apart and the hammock wouldn’t be able to hang properly. “I’m sorry, poppet.” Daddy had said to a crying, 5 year old me, “We’ll do something more fun then a hammock, okay? Promise.” We had gotten a tree house instead, for which I was now very grateful.

There was silence as I reminisced my childhood before it had been ruined. Which reminded me . . .

“What . . . Who . . . Who are you?” I whispered.

“I’m Rachel Burns. But you already knew that.” She inclined her head back to where the conversation with the two men had taken place. I nodded and shuddered.

“What were you saying earlier? About your ‘agency’ or something and my story . . . How do you know me . . . it . . . ?”

“I work for a group of persons ratting out corrupt workers in the government. We know your story because your parents were our top infiltrators.”

What?”

“Your parents were working on both sides, helping us out. When the people on the other side found out, they killed them before we could save them. I’m sorry.” She hung her head.

These people; they were the reason my parents and Jack were dead. Immediately, I wanted all of them dead.

“Hey, stay calm!” Rachel snapped as I tensed and balled up my fists. “Seriously, we tried! By the time our agents got to the scene, the house was a pile of burning ash and you were crying in the tree house. You were only 7, okay? We did everything we could for you—” I cut her off.

“Besides find me a home! Or tell me what really happened, rather than letting those effing failures as parents tell me a second-hand rumor! You’re the reason my life is a living hell! Not those men back there!” By this point, I was on my feet, screaming at her. My body heaved as I breathed heavily. I moaned and sank to the ground, covering my face in my hands.

“We need your help,” she whispered. I looked up.

“Excuse me?”

“My division . . . We need your help to stop the people that have corrupted the government. You can help. You have the skill and determination to get the job done.”

“What job?” It wasn’t like I was committing anything to these people that ruined my life . . . I just wanted to see what the idiots needed from a pitiful, homeless, 17-year-old like me.

“I can’t tell you,” she said, shaking her head. “But if you’ll let me, I can take you back to Headquarters and debrief you.” She stood and brushed the bracken off her legs. “But only if you are truly on our side.” She held out her hand: an invitation.

I looked at her, considering the possibilities. If I took the job, I could die. I already knew that they didn’t have enough strength to beat those other guys, but where was my life going, anyway? If I didn’t, well, they might kill me for knowing too much. And even if they didn’t, could I really go back to doing what I did everyday without thinking about it? Without regretting not accepting the job? I took a chance.

I grabbed Rachel’s hand and pulled myself up.

“Yes.”

“Are you fully committed to this?”

“Absolutely.”

“Great,” she said with a solemn smile. “Follow me.” She led me, her hand still in mine, back farther into the woods; much deeper than I’d ever gone before. She kept walking until we came across a moonlit clearing, a bold, intimidating motorcycle at its center. I stopped walking and my hand pulled out of Rachel’s. She turned, a grin playing across her small face.

“It won’t bite,” she teased. She turned and continued walking to the bike. She retrieved a bulky helmet off the seat and threw it to me. I had just enough of a warning to catch it with atypical skill. “It won’t look pretty, but you won’t bash your head in.”

I put it on, and slid the face guard over my beep blue eyes. Rachel was straddling the huge motorcycle as I walked towards her. It looked way too big in comparison to her small figure, but she fit smugly into the contours of the bike as if it were made for her.

“Hop on,” she said lightly as she kick started the bike and it gave an ear-splitting growl. I timidly threw one leg over the seat and hesitantly put my arms around the girl’s skinny waist. I was more afraid that I was going to snap her in half than I was us crashing into one of the trees as she switched gears and dexterously swerved through the thick trunks of my forest to God knows where.

I held onto Rachel tighter and buried my face into her shoulder. The movement of the bike was gentle and the purr of the engine was no longer frightening, but soft, like a lullaby, and soon I had fallen asleep on the shoulder of a stranger, going to a strange, new place, with a job that would or would not kill me. I slept well.

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Emerson
Review
Emerson wrote a review · Fri Mar 20, 2009 5:00 pm

Hey there, and welcome to YWS!

Just something you might want to consider: posting something this long will make it harder for you to get reviews. Perhaps if you break it up into two pieces for one chapter? People are more likely to review things they can cover in one sitting. ;-)

Alright! I've read the whole chapter and there are a few things I can help you with.

First of all, you have some typos here or there that I'm sure you can catch yourself if you take a read through. Just pay attention to your words, maybe read it out loud or something.

Now to the actual story, shall we?

You have a real knack for details, which is great! I really enjoyed some of them, and that helped make the writing nice. However, the way you started this story makes it a bit hard for me to follow and keep up with it. You cover a lot of plot and information in this first chapter. Characters, names, past events, organizations. It's great to get us into the story so soon, but you have to hook us first! It's kind of confusing to have all that thrown at us. And like I said, you should hook us first.

I have no idea who your main character is, or anything about her, really. You have given us some information, but you haven't done the important part: make me care about her. That's kind of a hard to do and hard for me to explain, but you need to give us a way to relate to your character, make her realistic. Rather than throwing facts about her life at us, and all this conflict, give us the character. Okay, true, give us character and conflict, but we won't care about the conflict if we don't care about the character.

I also think you could shorten the chapter a lot. Instead of bulking it up with all these facts and information, give us the beginning plot, the introduction to the character. You don't need to throw us right into the middle of the story, but get us in there far enough so we want to read more.

I hope I helped, but if you have any questions about something I said, feel free to write me!



I feel like if men sent unsolicited dragon pics instead of *other* unsolicited pics they’d get a lot further in life
— ShadowVyper