The sand and the sea

gracy wrote:This is a story I have been coming back to randomly since I first wrote it when I was 7 and I'm now 12 so I really hope you like it...

The sand and the sea once played happily together. Although the sand was shy, and always hidden from sight, thanks to her best friend the sea covering her up. But one day something horrible happened. It is because of this that the sea now sits trying to, once again, help out his friend.
The story of this starts here...
One day the sand and the sea were playing their favorite game, eye-spy. They had asked the lonely island of Hawaii if she wanted to play, but she had told them, rather jealously, no. So the sand and the sea hadleft the jealous island of Hawaii and started to play eye-spy.
Little did they know, the small, lonely and seemingly innocent Hawaii had been plotting with other left out countries and islands onhow to separate the annoyingly chatty best friends, the sand and the sea.Their plan so far was to pull in the sand while, at the same time, pushing out the sea. All they needed to do was
figureout when.
For the next few days the sand and the sea sat and talked about the upcoming solar eclipse. The islands and countries knew that this would be the perfect opportunity to put their ingenious plan into action. So they set out getting ready for their attack.
As the day of the eclipse came closer and closer, and the sand and the sea became more and more suspicious. The countries and the islands, Especially Hawaii, had become quiet and hadbeen jumping at any small noises. The sand and the sea knew that those were signs of a guilty conscience. And yet, they couldn't even convince the gullible country of New Zealand to spill the beans. Mainly because, even though New Zealand was a gullible country, it was a very stubborn and secretive country.
Finally, the day of the Solar Eclipse arrived. The sand and the sea had spent the day preparing, getting comfortable, and, of course, talking about what they thought it would look like. Of course neither one of them had seen a Solar Eclipse before so they had some pretty crazy thoughts such as, the sky turning purple, green or blue. Or it raining like nothing they'd ever seen before, either way neither one of them guessed correctly.(Might be a good place for dialogue, unless you want this to be a continuous stream of narrative.)It had been a busy day planning for the islands and countries around the world to. Especially Hawaii, as she was in charge of the entire operation. They had all been concentrating on two things in particular: when would be the perfect time to start pulling, and what the signal would be. Eventually, they decided to act when the sun was completely eclipsed by the moon; ‘now, ’would be the signal. They decided that a loud noise would startle the sea and the sand into shock, making it easier to pull them apart.
“Woooooooooow” exclaimed the sea when the eclipse started. It was way more beautiful that anything they could’ve thought of. Suddenly there was a jolt. The eclipse was full so all the islands and countries had started pulling, before the signal. “Help meeeeeee!” Screamed the sand, “something’s pulling me!” “Quick” the sand exclaimed.
The sea tried and tried to get his friend back, but his efforts were helpless compared to the islands and countries. He called the coral and sea weed to help him, but even then they couldn’t get the sand back, just when the thought that they had tried everything the sea weed had an idea. “Use me as a rope” the sea weed volunteered. "I can pull the sand and you can pull me” she explained. Everyone liked the plan except the eldest turtle livingwho tried to remind them that the islands and countries could use their own weapon against them, and pull even more things such as the sea weed up on to their bare edges. The people considered this for a moment, forgot what they were thinking about, and returned to the sea weeds plan. (I'm not really sure I follow this line of reasoning; maybe if you elaborately a little more.)
Of course, since it’s always best to listen to your elders, the plan failed. The sea weed was pulled onto the island of Madagascar and left stranded. The sea had one last alternative, to use all of his power. Using all of his remaining strength he pushed himself forward and used his arms to try and pull the sand and seaweed back.
The sea is to this very day still reaching out, with his fingers, to his friend the sea trying to get her back to him. He also calls to her always knowing that he will, somehow, pull her back to him. (This was a very nice ending.)Comments will be fully appreciated.

Aw, I really like this story. It's really cute.
BUT, I do have some things to comment on, hahah. Is there a way to add indents? If you're on Google Chrome, then never mind. Google Chromes mean when it comes to indenting.
And for the way you spell "eye-spy," isn't it supposed to be spelled as "I-spy"? Truthfully I don't even know so you can keep it like that if you want.

One day the sand and the sea were playing their favorite game. It was eye-spy. They had asked the lonely island of Hawaii if she wanted to play, but she had told them, rather jealously, no. So the sand and the sea had left the jealous island of Hawaii and started to play eye-spy.
Little did they know, the small seemingly lonely and innocent Hawaii had been plotting with other left out countries and islands how to separate the annoyingly chatty best friends, the sand and the sea? {Maybe shorten it some? It seems like a run-on sentence} Their plan so far was to, at the same time; pull at the sand while pushing in the sea there for separating them. All they needed to do was Figure out when.

Aww. I thought it was really cute! i enjoyed it a lot!
Keep writing!

By the way I wrote this for a short story contest but it couldn't be submitted because it had too many words so any comments would be fantastic.