Warning, the deaths are very descriptive.
Pain, all I can feel now is the pain. The pain for those I have lost and the pain for what I've become. The pain of my wounds, the scars, bruises, and blisters all too many to count. And the pain of others that I have felt, their own guilt, sorrows, and sins. We all pray for this to be a nightmare, but this is our reality.
I remember day zero, the events of that day are etched into my brain until the end of my life. I was in my high school eating lunch with my friends and all was normal. Everyone was laughing and joking and I was having a conversation with my girl friend. Then just like that, I heard a scream and looked to see the adults go into shock! All one of them fell to the floor while foam erupted from their mouths, we thought they were dead, but they weren't.
Suddenly, they began to rise up, run towards the students, and attack them! I watched as they beat the students to death and then begin to devour their corpses; pulling out their organs and guts in a bloody mess and eating them like the wild bear that had just caught another meal. Then one, a tall, thin woman, her face bloody already from devouring her first meal sprinted directly at me but I dodged her in time and threw her face-first into the hard, brick wall. I heard a sickening crunch and watched as she fell to the floor while black liquid oozed from the temple of her head. I was pulled back into reality from my girl friend as she dragged me away from the gruesome scene I had committed. We escaped out of one of the side entrances; all I had on me was a watch, wallet, and a phone and each of them would play a valuable role in my survival.
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Thanks for the comments guys. I might continue on with the story but right now I'm deciding between this, another story idea that I have posted, and one more that's an idea in my head right now.
Wow! Very descriptive and wonderfully written! You have obviously put some thought into this piece and I love the 'zombie' idea. The layout of the piece is a bit confusing or that might just be on my dodgy iPod but overall a really good piece of work! Keep it up
- J
It does flow very nicely. All I found were a couple grammar errors, but other than that it is fantastic. Please continue with the story, for you have piqued my interest. Also if you have not already, please check out the author Jonathan Maberry. He is damn good read for zombie lovers.
I like it. Very gruesome, flows nicely. You describe zombieism very well (LOL). I have no other review other than to say... MAKE MORE DEATHS!!!! (LOL) but really it was very good.
Thank you Demib. I was sort of've thinking of continuing this story and just improving upon it with more and more chapters.