Untitled

Hey all, I know I havent written in a while so I decided to treat you guys to something new im working on, and if you guys comment, i PROMISE to comment on yours. XD Oh, btw, this isnt for the faint hearted either so be warned.

Love you all.

My heart wrenched out from me. Was this pain, this yearning ever going to stop? I had had my fair share of pain in this world and I certainly did not need anymore of it. I mean, who was he to think that I needed him like he needed me? Did he honestly think that after all this time I could just forgive and go back to how it was? He should know me better; give me better credit then that. I guess I’m just another one of his girl’s, one that he can throw around as he pleases and knows in the morning I wont give him shit about it because “I love him” were the last words he heard me say to my friend on the phone. Did he think that I don’t have feelings at all? That I was just some heartless, drugged up whore no one cared about?

The pillows around me were well and truly soaked up by now. My tears ran like a torrent down my face and I wasn’t going to stop them. It was only early in the evening. I had already seen him twice and both times he had managed to make me feel like the lowliest scum to ever walk this planet. It wasn’t fair and it wasn’t right. I did what he told me to. Just bend over baby you know you want to. And I knew I didn’t but I did anyway. I needed the money and in times like ours, you do anything for anyone, no matter how hard you wish it didn’t have to. I felt like ripping my peroxide blonde hair from my scalp and screaming from the top of my lungs. But I knew that wouldn’t help either.

I heard his truck pull up in front of the house, grunting and groaning from over exertion of the motor. His feet stomping up the path to the door and swearing angrily when he realized he was too pissed to put the key in straight. Eventually he found it and burst through my door, where he found me curled into a ball in the middle of the bed. Oh great. He pulled me up roughly and demanded I get undressed at once. When I paused he struck me across the face, it felt like I had been hit with a metal bar. I yelped and out of his mouth flew a bunch of expletives you don’t hear outside a truck stop.

We “did” it until he was tired and shoved me off him like a hunting animal disgusted at the fact the carcass no longer had any food to sustain his enjoyment. I rolled over on my side and shivered as the breeze blew in through the window. He grunted and pulled himself off the bed, shuffling across the floor and out the door. And at that moment I knew I would not have to deal with him again that night. I picked up my mobile and began dialing the women’s help line I had permanently stored in my phone, hidden under the name “Aunt Lucy” The phone rang and on the third dial, a kind voice answered.

“Hello? How can I help you.”

“Umm hi, it’s Sarah, Sarah Barker. Can I talk to Mel please? If she is there.”

There was a pause on the other end of the phone and a shuffle as the phone swapped hands. “Sarah. Did he do it again? Come and stay here. Please, your one of my closest friends, why do you put yourself through this?”

“Because, if I go there I will look like every other hooker. I don’t need help, I just need him gone.” I sniffed and curled into a ball, holding my heart in my chest, hoping the pain would end.

“The first step you take, it’s the longest ride y’know. You have to take that step. Getting rid of him might be easier then you think.”

I listened. Now I was interested.