There are so many types of skies.
Bright blue of the summer morning,
the winds joining it with sighs.
The skies fade to a gray,
as the season draws to winter,
showing that the sky no longer feels gay.
The skies change to a dark blue,
seeming almost like black,
and stars scatter themselves as if on cue.
Lightning flashes, scarring the sky,
the stars dissapearing behind the clouds,
sending fear into those who lie.
Streaks of colors run like streams,
all across the new fresh sky above,
the sky seeming to burst through its seams
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Canary word: Present
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125,020 Literary Works • 672,861 Reviews
This is very beautiful and colorful, presenting a wonderful array of imagery. I can't really find anything to nitpick.
I liked this line:
"Lightning flashes, scarring the sky"
A very good poem.
Again that third line is eluding me, perhaps i'm just stupid and can't utilize my poetic brain, but I dont get it. First there is a sigh and then....the sky no longer feels happy, I thought it wasn't happy before hence the 'the wind joining it with sighs'.
I get this one, and I like this one. Partly because I understand it, and although I thought you could have put much more descriptive words to show that it's night, it was pretty good.
First we are talking about types of skies now we are talking about liars? I think the third line should be reconstructed.
This is quite possibly my favorite line in this, here you write like a promising poet, I could follow it, the flow was good.
Although I think this poem is meant to be personifying the sky, I don't think you succeeded entirely but I believe that you could do a lot better than this. Here is a link of a fellow YWSers poem that I think could help you: Here as she personifies Envy. Although your works both have different meaning I think you could learn a lot from her poem.
Anger
Nice poem! I really like the title. So, the first stanza of your poem sets the pattern and mood for the poem really well. For some reason, I find the first line, "There are so many types of skies" sounds like a scientific fact. I guess it's the way you state that or word it, or maybe I'm just really weird, and yes, I am weird. But I'm not saying you should change it, I'm just saying what it made me think of.
In the fourth stanza, the last line, "sending fear into those who lie" seems out of place to me. In the other stanzas, the last line is something sky-related.
I really like the last stanza. I would add an "and" in front of the last line and a period at the end.
In all the other stanzas I love the way you describe the sky and your rhyming pattern is neat.
I really do like this poem and the topic you stuck to and the title.
Great work and keep writing!