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Quest for Fire Book Two~Frozen Past Chapter 17

by felistia


A few hours later the clouds had completely cleared and bright sunshine sparkled along Zoltar’s obsidian scales. He breathed a deep sigh of contentment as warmth spread from the tops of his horns to the very tip of his tail and he noticed the familiar feeling of heat building inside his chest. His fire was back. Zoltar let out a small finger of brilliant orange flame and felt his spirits rise. No more freezing cold days where all you wanted to do was journey up to the very sun herself and suck in her warm golden heat.

Zoltar felt a rush of excitement spill over him. Soon he’d see Emerald and Shiraku again. Sure the sea talon got on his nerves constantly, but after almost a week of separation, he found that he missed her sharp remarks. But it was Emerald that he missed the most; her vibrant scales, sweet understanding voice and kind heart. Zoltar wasn’t surprised to find that he’d quickened his wing beats. He was only a few kilometers from where he’d last seen them. Why, he could even see the tree they’d slept under, it’s skeleton-like figure visible from miles away.

Zoltar scanned the landscape ahead, hoping to see the beautiful green scales of Emerald or the ridiculously bright turquoise scales of Shiraku, but there was nothing. A wave of fear crossed over Zoltar. Why couldn’t he see them? They should stick out like polar bears in a desert.

‘Relax,’ Zoltar told himself, trying to calm his shaking nerves, ‘they’re probably in hiding.’ Still his heart thumped in his chest and a head ache started to throb from between his horns. What if they weren’t hiding? What if something had really happened to them? He swallowed the lump building in his throat, a cold, clammy sensation creeping over his scales. Where were they?

He sensed Felistia glide over to him, worry shimmering in her glittering gold eyes, “Can you see them?” she asked as she twisted her head this way and that, searching the ground below.

Zoltar shook his head. 

"Zoltar," Felistia started, concern seeping into every corner of her voice, "They might not be there you know? We have been away for almost a week and this isn't exactly the safest place for them to stay."

Zoltar sighed, his eyes darting from the barren landscape back to Felistia. She was right. They might have decided to leave. But something just didn't add up, Emerald didn't have anywhere to go. She couldn't go back to her island and it wasn't like there was anywhere on the continent for her. Worry gnawed at his insides like a hungry beast. If Emerald was camouflaged then surely she would have shown herself by now?

The tree was only a few meters away now. Tucking in his wings, Zoltar tipped into a swallow dive, streaking through the sky towards the earth. With only a few seconds to spare, he flung out his wings and landed gently on the ground beside the long dead tree. Felistia and Shriken touched down next to him. Felistia began explaining to Shriken what the problem was and who Shiraku and Emerald were. He nodded with understanding and listened with a pitiful look on his snout.

Zoltar, in the meantime, was searching area like mad, looking for any clues as to what had happened to Emerald and Shiraku. He knew for sure now that something was wrong. They would have spotted them from the sky ages ago and would have come to greet them as soon as they’d landed. Dread filled all corners of his mind as vivid pictures of what might have happened flashed in front of his eyes. Had they been captured by ice talons and were now slowly freezing to death in a prison? Maybe they'd been attacked by something? Had they left him and Felistia?

Zoltar knew that Emerald wouldn’t have left him, Shiraku maybe, but not Emerald. She didn’t have anywhere to go and she couldn’t go back to her island without his help.

Out the corner of his eye he could see Felistia padding over to him, her face dark with grief.

"Zoltar," she said softly, putting a wing over his back, "They're not here. For all we know they could be halfway across the Megalonia by now. It's hopeless."

"No," Zoltar hissed, throwing her wing off, "I refuse to except that." Frantically he sniffed the air, longing to catch their scent. The cold frozen aroma of snow and dead pines filled his nose, but somewhere in that jumble of scents came the faint whiff of dragon. He couldn't tell what species it was, but it was defiantly dragon. Inhaling deeply, he followed the thin trail, every second afraid that he might lose it in the mass of other smells bombarding him. After a few seconds of following the track, it began to grow in strength, biting through the other scents. At last he stopped a few meters away from the tree Shriken and Felistia were standing under. The smell was so strong here, but he couldn’t see any sign of Shiraku or Emerald. He scanned the ground, digging through the snow in the desperate hopes that there might be a tunnel of some kind.

Felistia and Shriken watched from under the tree, their eyes filled pity. Finally, after half an hour of  mad digging, Zoltar gave up. Felistia was right. It was hopeless. How was he going to find out where his friends had gone in the whole of Megalonia? He couldn’t find any trace of them, but still the scent of dragon was strong in the area. With a sigh, he turned to join the others, when suddenly a spark of light caught the corner of his eye. He looked back over his shoulder. There half buried in the churned up snow, was a cobalt blue scale, its tip gleaming in the bright sunlight. Zoltar gently picked the scale up from the snow. It definitely wasn’t Shiraku’s or Emerald’s. It was a diamond shape unlike Emerald’s round and was a too deep a blue for Shiraku.

He gave the scale a hesitant sniff. The overpowering stench of wind talon filled his senses, causing him to wrinkle his snout in disgust. He kept searching for Emerald and Shiraku’s scent though…and there it was, hidden among the bold odor of wind talon.

A surge of hope and worry swept Zoltar. What was a wind talon scale doing here and why did it smell like his friends? He frantically started shoveling snow away from where the scale had been and sure enough after digging through layers of fresh snow, he hit the frozen sheet beneath. Its surface was covered in scratches and burn marks. A single turquoise blue back spike stuck out of the ice, drops of blood staining the perfect exterior. Wind talons had been here alright and it looked like they’d taken Emerald and Shiraku.

A\N This is the end of The Quest for Fire Book Two Frozen Past. If you wish to continue the series please go to my portfolio and click on the folder called quest for fire book 3 touching the sky.


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Sat Jul 02, 2016 3:32 pm
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Carlito wrote a review...



Hello again! :D (I just realized I never did finish reading book two...)

He breathed a deep sigh of content as warmth

"contentment" instead of "content."

Breathing a small finger of brilliant orange flame to be sure, Zoltar felt his spirits rise.

Flip this sentence around to make it more active: "Zoltar let out a small finger of brilliant orange flame and felt his spirits rise."

He was only a few kilometers from where he’d last seen her.

I think you could go with "them" instead of "her" because even though he's more excited to see Emerald, he's looking for Shiraku as well.

He nodded understandingly and listened with a pitiful look on his snout.

"Understandingly" isn't a word - try "with understanding" instead :)

Zoltar in the meantime was searching area like mad,

You would need commas around "in the meantime", or you could put that first ("In the meantime, Zoltar was..."

Zoltar knew that Emerald wouldn’t have left him, Shiraku maybe, but not Emerald. She didn’t have anywhere to go and she couldn’t go back to her island without his help.

And what about Felistia? Would Emerald or Shiraku leave her? I feel like Shiraku wouldn't because they were together when Zoltar found them.

At last he stopped a few meters away from the tree.

The tree? What tree is that? The tree they slept under? If this is a random tree, I would go with "a tree".

Felistia and Shriken watched from under the tree, their eyes filled pity.

Is there a reason they're not helping? Has there been any sort of conversation about what Zoltar is trying to do and asking for help? So much of this is happening inside Zoltar's head, which is great, I love that you're including a lot of his thoughts! But, I think there needs to be a bit more interaction with the others here as well.

He gave the scale a hesitant sniff. The overpowering stench of wind talon filled his senses, causing him to wrinkle his snout in disgust.

So about these smells. He's been getting a dragon smell for all this time, but it's just been generic dragon? He determines the specific type of dragon from the smell of this scale and then determines that his friends were probably taken by a wind talon. Is he not able to distinguish the smell before when he was looking? Was it to dispersed for him to realize sooner that what he was smelling was probably a wind talon? Or were the smells mixed making him just smell dragon because Emerald, Shiraku, and whoever took them were all there in the same place at the same time?

This chapter is very Zoltar focused, and like I mentioned a bit earlier, I think I would like some more involvement from Felistia and her brother. I feel like there needs to be a conversation in here somewhere and Felistia and the brother need to have a more active role in trying to find their friends.

Also. Why. Would you leave us. Like that? :o
I hope you post Book 3, Ch. 1 soon!! In the meantime, let me know if you have any questions or if anything I said was confusing! :D




felistia says...


Thanks so much for your review. I'll go back and fix the chapter soon. At the moment I'm fixing book one after some more reviews and I'm also planning out book three, to the next chapter might be a while. :D



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Sun Jun 26, 2016 11:57 pm
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FeatherPen wrote a review...



I’m here for another review.

It seems cheating to say it after I find out that it is true, but i was guessing that something had happened to Shiraku or Emerald, although my thoughts were more along the lines of the ice talon guards. I’m pretty sure this was because of how often Zoltar thought about them and presumed they would all be reunited soon. It is obvious because it is a story and things can’t go that smoothly. I think that when you can make a reader do this, it grants a feeling of satisfaction and stops your plot twist from seeming to sudden.


Having left the ice kingdom they seem to be over confident of their safety, I would be looking over my shoulder constantly in disbelief that I had escaped and was not being followed. Additionally they are very conspicuous, out in the open, as the cloud cover leaves and they approach the icy plane. Normally they seem quite conscious of any dangers.

One nit pick
With only a few seconds to spare, his flung out his wings and landed gently on the ground beside the long dead tree.
He flung out his wings

I can’t wait to read the next book. Its been a while since ive reviewed you writing and I think your it is improving; you are perfecting the description, action balance and your pacing has been great apart from the three chapters Carlito mentioned.




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Sun Jun 26, 2016 11:50 pm
Virgil wrote a review...



This is Yams here for a review on Review Day!

I liked the ending and how soft it was but I also liked how it started up a next book. It did feel kind of weak to me, though. This all feels more like parts to a story than whole novels, in my opinion. Like they're big parts to one big novel where the story just keeps continuing.

I don't really like series since they're time consuming and it kind of feels like you're running out of things to write about with this concept, but maybe I'm wrong. My advice is to cut all strings off when you feel like it's starting to get /worse worse/, because based on gut instinct, it probably is.

I didn't really get emotional at the ending you had and instead it more felt like and "oh, it's over. okay then." moment but I know it'll be continued so I guess there's no reason for it to be this some spectacular emotional ending.

Overall this chapter just felt like it kind of fell short compared to the others like someone with short legs compared to a person with long legs. It didn't run as far and was short. This chapter was alright but I felt like it could've improved.

That's all I have for you today, have a great day.




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Sun Jun 26, 2016 6:13 am
Dracula wrote a review...



You've done so many reviews today that it would be wrong for you not to get some of your own, so here I am. :)

Wow! Your writing is really amazing. Seriously, I'm jealous. This is such high quality writing that I would expect to see in a published novel, not on Yewis (not to say that Yewis has bad writing, but you know what I mean). Your descriptions are beautiful; your characters are explored in depth and have such vibrant personalities; and the conflict in the story is obvious even though I haven't read other chapters. These are two bits of writing which stood out to me as especially amazing: Twisted her head this way and that, searching the ground below. The cold frozen aroma of snow and dead pines filled his nose, but somewhere in that jumble of scents came the faint whiff of dragon.

I don't have any major suggestions for ways you could improve this. I think it's brilliant how it is. There's just a few small nitpicks I found while reading through, which I've listed below:

Never again would they have to enter the Ice kingdom.
I may be wrong, but I reckon kingdom should be capitalised. By itself, it doesn't need to be, but since Ice Kingdom is a name...

Why, he could even see the tree they’d slept under, it’s skeleton like figure visible from miles away.
I believe skeleton like should be connected so it reads skeleton-like.

Felistia began explaining to Shriken what the problem was and who Shriken and Emerald were.
You accidentally typed Shriken twice, when it should say Shiraku.

Had they been captured by ice talons and where now slowly freezing to death in a prison?
Where needs to become were.

Wind talons had been here alright and it looked like they’d had taken Emerald and Shiraku.
Read through this again, you say 'had' twice. And it looked like [they had] had taken Emerald and Shiraku.

Nitpicks aside, you have a top quality piece of work here. Thanks for sharing it with us!




felistia says...


Thanks for the review. I've fixed the problems. :D




Once you have people's attention, you have a greater responsibility to tell them something of value.
— Tobias Forge (Ghost B.C.)