Published April 1, 2012
I was a usually clean-cut, kid. I never touched drugs. Loved me some alcohol once every now and again, but never wanted to go to Candy Mountain. Fifteen; that's a big number. With two digits, you have a lot of responsibility. And then sixteen came; Women hood. I was supposed to have grown some, not demote to a stoner with a party-hard attitude and no thoughts on my future. Not that I'm spiraling, or complaining. Drugs are bad, yada yada yada. But if you take life in stride - little bit of pot here, few shots over there - you can have that happy median. I didn't have that happy median; that cute little center area where black and white harmonize to grey. Naw, I was stuck in the cracks. Everything upside down, backwards - warped. Everyone says "weed" isn't addictive, that its the high that gets you going. I never used to believe those words, I always just steered clear. What you don't know won't hurt yea, right ? Wrong.
The first time I touched the shit was a couple months ago. Yeah, I'm what you call "New-Blood" among the teenage, stoner population. Not too proud of it, either. But eh; Win some, lose some. I was with my best friend (Isn't that how it always happens ?) She supplied it, while I sat at the top of the hill with her and smoked it. Can't really get any more descriptive than that; unless y'all want me to start tellin' you what kind of kush it was and all that jazz. Rather not, though. I'm no expert. Weed, to me, is weed. Drugs are, well, drugs. I guess if you're in the business, it matters, but to your average Joe - say moi - its like band-camp. I hate band-camp (And not just because of that one movie, either)
To be honest with you, my first time didn't really get me all that "high". I was simply, tired. Now, some would say that it was "Bad Pot", but again, who fucken cares ? What matters is that I smoked a dubie on the hill near my school with one of my best friends (Who also deals. Woot.) and for what ? After that I didn't touch it again for a good month. Then, after that month, the teenager in me came out and my rebellious attitude turned into something else. Something worse. I was no longer "Brie", I was "Status Quo" (Well, for our generation, that is) For someone who has never conformed in their lives, this was, and still is a big deal to me !
Even so, I ended up getting addicted to that high. For awhile, there wasn't a day I wasn't smoking up. Whether it be with friends, or complete strangers. I had done something I told myself I'd never do. Well, okay, maybe two things. Drugs, and blending in. I've failed myself. My wake-up call was partying at a friends. Shit went down that night, and long story short, Brie-Chan is no longer a virgin. It wasn't mutual either, which should bring all the threads together and knit you a nice sweater.
Welp, there you have it. I guess that's my story on why drugs, alcohol and rock n' roll can be bad when you over-indulge (But that stands for everything in life). I'm not what one would call a "stoner" anymore - I'm sure you can understand why. But, I do smoke-up with friends every now and again. Same with drinking (Though, that is one addiction I have yet to overcome) The whole point of this - for those who read and aren't all like "DRUGSAREBADGUIZE" or "FUCKYOU.SMOKEWEEDERRRE-DAYMANN" - was to say be careful. Its nice to let loose, but remember we all gotta grow up sometime. Be sure you don't end up regretting the decisions you make - live life to the fullest, without the stupidity.
WELL THEN. I'm gonna go eat some soup; since its the only fucking thing I can swallow right now.
* Mono sucks.
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141,367 Literary Works • 674,383 Reviews
Hey there, evil_kookies.
I'd like to start out by saying, this is a brilliant character piece. The narrator's voice is very clear, from the very first line, and stays consistent the whole way through, painting a wonderful picture for the reader. However, there are a few things I'd like to suggest for improving it.
First up, your opening line. I'm sure you've read a whole bunch about how important opening lines are, and as they go, this one isn't bad. It introduces the topic neatly and clearly. Unfortunately, the wording feels... quite off. "I was a usually" doesn't feel like the right word order, and made me look twice. "I was usually a" would feel better, but I'd suggest "I used to be a" as a better version - after all, you're describing Brie's descent into drugs, so she *used* to be clean, but during the frame of events wasn't *usually* clean, if that makes sense.
Second, a general point about grammar. If you'd like me to go through and do a nit-picking of the grammar in this (a line-by-line picking out of the things that could use work), hit me up with a PM and I'll get back to you. I appreciate that textbook English wouldn't fit the character, but there are some things here that hinder rather than help the flow of the narrator's voice. It's always a good idea to get things like grammar and spelling pinned down, so you can focus on the fun bits of writing.
Finally, your last line. This feels like an author's note, rather than part of the story? If it's the former, I'd suggest putting quote- or spoiler-tags around it, to make that clear. If the latter, I would advise getting rid of it. The "live life to the fullest" line above it hits home with your message, and having the extra line just detracts from the power.
Overall, I like it. Please feel free to ask if anything doesn't seem clear - site notifications aren't up yet, so I might not see any replies to this thread, but I'm usually in the chatroom most of the hours I'm awake, and if I'm not there then shooting a site PM my way will catch me.
Happy writing!
Cadi x