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A Comical Letter to Santa Claus

by erilea


Dear Santa,

Every year, a kid looks forward to December 25th--Christmas. And why? Because they're given gifts, of course. I bet that all of us--maybe even you--has heard of that cliche scene of an excited little kid running down the stairs to check that big ol' Christmas tree. I know I've done that for many Christmases.

This year, I've given up hope. As I said before, I run down the stairs, dive under the tree, and eagerly look for some awesome present--and I find socks. For three years in a row now, I've found Fruit of the Loom among the branches. So my question to you is this: if a kid doesn't get a good present, what's the point of Christmas?

I've asked for action figures, Pokemon cards, everything. And what do I get? Socks. Ever since 2012, it's been socks. Can you please give me something less... I don't know, lame? I'm gonna try again, one last time, this year. I'm gonna hope for the best. And if I find socks one more time, I'll sue you. Believe me, it works. Even in the North Pole.

Sincerely,

Sock Boy

P.S. DEATH TO SOCKS!


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Wed Oct 28, 2015 12:23 am
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yellow wrote a review...



Hello, Artemis! Elysium here with a review.

So, yes I see the humor and the satire in there but I'm not really feeling it. This is okay, but it's bland. There isn't a lot of detail. Let's start.

Every year, a kid looks forward to December 25th--Christmas.


Yes, your Dear Santa part gives it away, but I think that if you paraphrase this sentence, it would add the lacked detail. Also, you stated "a kid." Instead I would put "nearly every child in the world."

Every year, nearly every child looks forward to a certain holiday. The holiday that puts gifts under a tall green line tree, the holiday of pure, white, beautiful snow, and the holiday where we celebrate the birth of Christ. Christmas.


I will also state that the character that is writing the letter seems greedy, ungrateful. I don't know really of you were trying tk achieve that, but I won't go into the cliche "true meaning of Christmas" speech.

Ever since 2012, it's been socks.


Yes, this does say 2012 and since when, but I would instead say,

Ever since that fateful day three years ago, it has been the dreaded pair of white ankle socks.


See? I think it sounds a lot better

Anyways, this could use some polishing up. It isn't the best but it isn't the worst. There is always room for improvement and please don't get discouraged by this review. Thank you.

-Elysium




erilea says...


This was supposed to be in little kid style, when all he thinks about is presents. But yeah. :D



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Tue Oct 27, 2015 6:57 pm
Mortilum wrote a review...



Hahah, this was funny. Truth be told, I expected something mediocre when I read the title. But you surprised me. That has to be funny for the parents when they read his 'Note To Santa' and find out that their gifts suck.

I myself, I really hate getting clothes. Not for immature reasons, I've just always hated clothes. Your relatives will never know your tastes and they will buy the most ridiculous articles of clothing for you. Socks are okay, but even then, a relative will always get you the wrong shape/thickness of sock. At least, that has always been the case for me.




erilea says...


This hasn't happened to me yet, but I thought it'd be fun.



Mortilum says...


Heheh, it's fun to read and you did a good job xD



erilea says...


Thanks!



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Mon Oct 26, 2015 9:02 pm
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Astronaut says...



Pshhhhhhhhhhh, I ask for socks every year. Not even kidding, I'm just a dork.




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Mon Oct 26, 2015 3:28 am
basia77201 wrote a review...



Hi there!
Basia77201 here. This is funny. I also find it funny how little kids hate getting clothes, and as we get older, for girls at least, we hope to get some nice clothes. (I know I do!) Funny how we change. I love this letter, and its really a nice breath of fresh air from all the gloomy said poems and short stories. Ironic I say that because I write stuff like that. If you don't mind, I would like to put this in my writer's notebook.




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Sun Oct 25, 2015 8:31 am
origamidragons says...



Nice. I like the fun tone this letter has- it's not serious at all, but in a good way. It's actually very adorable and relatable because we've all been there, haven't we? And I imagine several kids have written this exact same letter to Santa.

I will say it's a little early in the year for stuff like this still (Halloween stories!) but its okay :)




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Sun Oct 25, 2015 8:31 am
origamidragons wrote a review...



Nice. I like the fun tone this letter has- it's not serious at all, but in a good way. It's actually very adorable and relatable because we've all been there, haven't we? And I imagine several kids have written this exact same letter to Santa.

I will say it's a little early in the year for stuff like this still (Halloween stories!) but its okay :)




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Fri Oct 23, 2015 12:53 pm
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unluminescent says...



Haha! I just love the light, humorous feel of this letter. Great job!




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Fri Oct 23, 2015 1:14 am
Mannyic wrote a review...



Hahahaha, I found this piece actually pretty funny and very relatable. I found the writing ok, but a little childish. The piece itself is good and many will like it because of being able to relate or because nostalgia. I believe that you could turn this even in to a good short story. Anyways it is good work keep it up




erilea says...


It was meant to be childish, because "Sock Boy" is young, about seven to eight years old. But thanks! :)



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Thu Oct 22, 2015 11:12 pm
GraypatOhel27 says...



I can relate to this! I hope for a cool new video game, but instead, clothes. I especially like how you signed the letter "sock boy" and said "death to socks!" in all caps. You write nicely and I think we've all found "Fruit of the loom" among the branches. Nice job, I do like satirical things like this! Death to socks, life to video games.




erilea says...


Haha, thanks for the comment! :D




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