Hello, steampowered here for a review! I’m aware this was posted, like, a month ago, but I found it while browsing through the literary works tab and I could identify with it so much I really wanted to leave a review on it. (I’m from the UK too and I’ve spent ages stressing out over my personal statement and whittling down my choices of which universities I want to go to. Time moves so fast… but I’ve now handed in my first draft)
I feel like the formatting of the poem could be improved by splitting up the stanzas. I didn’t realise this for ages but YWS actually changes the formatting so you don’t seem to be able to just have a blank line to split up verses. What I did was put a full stop in that line, so the poem would look more like this:
I dont think anyone knows
What to write here
There were 17 years
To decide
Yet my mind is blank for reasons,
Why you'd want me at your university,
Mr Admissions.
.
There is so much I could say, etc.
I just feel like it would read a bit better and look a bit tidier if you did this, but obviously you don’t have to take my advice. Maybe if you wanted to split the stanzas up, after every “Mr Admissions” would be a good place to do it?
"Most of what happened was illegal"
My favourite bit!
Other than that, I don’t have much to criticise, so I’m sorry this is such a short review. I really liked the repetition of “Mr Admissions” which kind of shows how detached and anonymous the selection process really is. You don’t know who they are and they don’t know who you are, and all they’re going by is a sheet of information you wrote about yourself. It’s scary…
Hopefully this review was of some use to you, and keep on writing!
Points: 455
Reviews: 359
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