z

Young Writers Society


12+

The Woes of an Artist

by ellyxian


The ink stains on my hands feel like blood 

Shed from all the lives I’ve created 

Lives I can never be a part of 

Lives that are only in my head

The thoughts that come alongside them 

They’re something I have to bare 

A cross I have to carry

A sin I shouldn’t share

And with every word I spill 

With every sentence I make 

No matter how much I pour

There’s a guilty feeling I couldn’t shake

So I share with you dear, passerby 

The woes of an artist, a writer’s cry

For help, I couldn’t ask 

For shame, I always come back 

So just like Sisyphus and his task 

I write until I could forget

Maybe the ink stains on my fingers 

Are proof of what I couldn’t do 

I may call myself an artist 

But I am not one for you

Because my soul is guarded 

For no one cares enough to look close 

It’s empty, I have nothing 

So I offer you my prose

And as all poets, I shall die a boring death 

Though I wish it to be beautiful 

I wish it to be a mess

My heart can never be truly satisfied 

For I keep wanting more 

I want peace, I want glory, 

Everything I’ve been craving for

Instead, I’ll say goodbye 

To the lives I couldn’t live 

The promises I couldn’t keep, 

The sacrifice I couldn’t give


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Sun Jan 29, 2023 9:20 pm
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Quillfeather wrote a review...



Hello! I hope you're having a lovely day or night or whatever time it may be for you! Quill here for a short review!

First impressions
Wow, I didn't expect a poem about art to be so emotional! But boy, was that good! I've never seen art described so well before! Some of my absolute favored lined are

The ink stains on my hands feel like blood

Shed from all the lives I’ve created
wow, I don't think non artist/writers understand what a connection you feel to the things you create. But you describe it perfectly![/quote]

So just like Sisyphus and his task

I write until I could forget


there is so much to say about this line but something that really jumps out at me right now and has to do with the way the artist can be so connected to their work. It's like a truth, an emotion inside you that has to come out, and I find that really interesting!

To the lives I couldn’t live

The promises I couldn’t keep,

The sacrifice I couldn’t give
this line was powerful I don't even know what to say. This is a hard, deep feeling that I think a lot of people feel but the thing about artist and writers is that the way we express through art it makes it so much more like there is so much you didn't do. I don't think this sentence makes any sense and I didn't say it quite right but oh well. Really great line!

minor suggestions
So there's really not much to say because this was crafted so well! I only have one thought and this is entirely option based:
I usually don't like too many stanza dividers but I think this piece could really benefit from it because this is a little bit longer of a piece(well, more midsized but anyway) and I think that having a break in text would be more inviting and could add more flow to add emotional pause In your work. But like I said it is completely creative choice and you don't have to listen to me at all!

conclusions!
I really enjoyed reading this piece! I loved the way you got so much emotion across in this piece. It really makes me think about art in a completely different way. Thank you so much for writing this poem!

Keep writing!
~Quill




ellyxian says...


Hey there Quill!

Thank you SO MUCH for this review. It feels like you get me and the messages I've put on this silly little poem. It's an honor to receive this review and I'm so happy to receive such a high praise. And you're so right about your minor suggestion. This piece is supposed to have stanza dividers but because I was new to the format of this website when I posted this, I struggled figuring out how to do that so I just gave up lol and posted it like this.

I really appreciate your review and I'm glad you enjoyed my work :D



Quillfeather says...


I'm so glad you found it helpful!!! Oh, that makes sense! I have also had some troubles getting it to work, sorry I don't have any tips to help I haven't posted in FOREVER. but seriously, really enjoyed!



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Wed Jan 25, 2023 1:08 am
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GengarIsBestBoy wrote a review...



Howdy hey! I’m here to give a review.

As someone who has maladaptive daydreams, I could relate to this poem. I’m always daydreaming about my characters and the world they live in, wishing I could be a part of it. I also just get so many ideas that I feel I could never write, whether I don’t have the time or skill. You did a really great job at capturing the feeling, although I feel it needs periods in some places.

I hope you’re feeling better from this soon!

—GengarIsBestBoy




ellyxian says...


Hey! Thanks for your review! And I agree, it does need more punctuation lol. I'm glad you liked and relate to the poem; means a lot for a starting artist like me so thank you so much :)



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Mon Jan 23, 2023 10:03 am
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yamatri wrote a review...



hey I love the idea of this poem that it is truly a bittersweet feeling when you create something you can never be a part of something you have wished as a possibility for your life, something you have written so beautifully that you wished was true, the endless guilt of writing someone's fate so poetically while living a reality of no prose.

And as all poets, I shall die a boring death

Though I wish it to be beautiful

I wish it to be a mess

( my fav line )
........

its a messy poem but i like it , sometimes you kind of contradict your self within it like


= Because my soul is guarded

For no one cares enough to look close

It’s empty, I have nothing

(I am not sure I am getting the right meaning of these lines.)
.........

= a sin I shouldn’t share

why is it (shouldn't ) like no one stops an artist to share the thought , it just that there is no way for an artist to share it, I think (couldn't ) would be better
i am not sure though

other than that loved it.
first time reviewing something so sorry if I overdid or underdid somethings , thanq




ellyxian says...


Thank you so much for your review!

You're right for it being messy because I literally just opened my laptop and word vomited all over it lol. I can see what you mean about it being contradictory so thank you for pointing that out. There's actually a personal meaning for each line but everyone have different interpretations of poetry so I'll just leave it to your imagination. But while I was writing the line "a sin I shouldn't share" I was thinking of it as a religious allegory, hence the previous line "a cross I have to carry" and it pertains to the heavy or sometimes depressing thoughts I have which inspires most of my writing which I consider to be as ugly as sin, and that's why I shouldn't share it.

Hope that clear some things up, and thank you so much for leaving a review on my first post. The criticism was appreciated.



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A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.
— Steve Martin