The ink stains on my hands feel like blood
Shed from all the lives I’ve created
Lives I can never be a part of
Lives that are only in my head
The thoughts that come alongside them
They’re something I have to bare
A cross I have to carry
A sin I shouldn’t share
And with every word I spill
With every sentence I make
No matter how much I pour
There’s a guilty feeling I couldn’t shake
So I share with you dear, passerby
The woes of an artist, a writer’s cry
For help, I couldn’t ask
For shame, I always come back
So just like Sisyphus and his task
I write until I could forget
Maybe the ink stains on my fingers
Are proof of what I couldn’t do
I may call myself an artist
But I am not one for you
Because my soul is guarded
For no one cares enough to look close
It’s empty, I have nothing
So I offer you my prose
And as all poets, I shall die a boring death
Though I wish it to be beautiful
I wish it to be a mess
My heart can never be truly satisfied
For I keep wanting more
I want peace, I want glory,
Everything I’ve been craving for
Instead, I’ll say goodbye
To the lives I couldn’t live
The promises I couldn’t keep,
The sacrifice I couldn’t give
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Canary word: Present
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125,018 Literary Works • 672,857 Reviews
Hello! I hope you're having a lovely day or night or whatever time it may be for you! Quill here for a short review!
wow, I don't think non artist/writers understand what a connection you feel to the things you create. But you describe it perfectly![/quote]First impressions
Wow, I didn't expect a poem about art to be so emotional! But boy, was that good! I've never seen art described so well before! Some of my absolute favored lined are
there is so much to say about this line but something that really jumps out at me right now and has to do with the way the artist can be so connected to their work. It's like a truth, an emotion inside you that has to come out, and I find that really interesting!
this line was powerful I don't even know what to say. This is a hard, deep feeling that I think a lot of people feel but the thing about artist and writers is that the way we express through art it makes it so much more like there is so much you didn't do. I don't think this sentence makes any sense and I didn't say it quite right but oh well. Really great line!
minor suggestions
So there's really not much to say because this was crafted so well! I only have one thought and this is entirely option based:
I usually don't like too many stanza dividers but I think this piece could really benefit from it because this is a little bit longer of a piece(well, more midsized but anyway) and I think that having a break in text would be more inviting and could add more flow to add emotional pause In your work. But like I said it is completely creative choice and you don't have to listen to me at all!
conclusions!
I really enjoyed reading this piece! I loved the way you got so much emotion across in this piece. It really makes me think about art in a completely different way. Thank you so much for writing this poem!
Keep writing!
~Quill
Hey there Quill!
Thank you SO MUCH for this review. It feels like you get me and the messages I've put on this silly little poem. It's an honor to receive this review and I'm so happy to receive such a high praise. And you're so right about your minor suggestion. This piece is supposed to have stanza dividers but because I was new to the format of this website when I posted this, I struggled figuring out how to do that so I just gave up lol and posted it like this.
I really appreciate your review and I'm glad you enjoyed my work
I'm so glad you found it helpful!!! Oh, that makes sense! I have also had some troubles getting it to work, sorry I don't have any tips to help I haven't posted in FOREVER. but seriously, really enjoyed!
Howdy hey! I’m here to give a review.
As someone who has maladaptive daydreams, I could relate to this poem. I’m always daydreaming about my characters and the world they live in, wishing I could be a part of it. I also just get so many ideas that I feel I could never write, whether I don’t have the time or skill. You did a really great job at capturing the feeling, although I feel it needs periods in some places.
I hope you’re feeling better from this soon!
—GengarIsBestBoy
Hey! Thanks for your review! And I agree, it does need more punctuation lol. I'm glad you liked and relate to the poem; means a lot for a starting artist like me so thank you so much
hey I love the idea of this poem that it is truly a bittersweet feeling when you create something you can never be a part of something you have wished as a possibility for your life, something you have written so beautifully that you wished was true, the endless guilt of writing someone's fate so poetically while living a reality of no prose.
And as all poets, I shall die a boring death
Though I wish it to be beautiful
I wish it to be a mess
( my fav line )
........
its a messy poem but i like it , sometimes you kind of contradict your self within it like
= Because my soul is guarded
For no one cares enough to look close
It’s empty, I have nothing
(I am not sure I am getting the right meaning of these lines.)
.........
= a sin I shouldn’t share
why is it (shouldn't ) like no one stops an artist to share the thought , it just that there is no way for an artist to share it, I think (couldn't ) would be better
i am not sure though
other than that loved it.
first time reviewing something so sorry if I overdid or underdid somethings , thanq
Thank you so much for your review!
You're right for it being messy because I literally just opened my laptop and word vomited all over it lol. I can see what you mean about it being contradictory so thank you for pointing that out. There's actually a personal meaning for each line but everyone have different interpretations of poetry so I'll just leave it to your imagination. But while I was writing the line "a sin I shouldn't share" I was thinking of it as a religious allegory, hence the previous line "a cross I have to carry" and it pertains to the heavy or sometimes depressing thoughts I have which inspires most of my writing which I consider to be as ugly as sin, and that's why I shouldn't share it.
Hope that clear some things up, and thank you so much for leaving a review on my first post. The criticism was appreciated.