Young Writers Society

Hi there, here for a quick review!

Overall Language and Meaning
The language, rhyming, and repetition of this poem gives it a marvelous flow - it was quite catching and I think you could almost sing it. I felt a bit like I was missing some sort of background information - what flag is this exactly? A country a sexuality a business a political party a personal emblem? I couldn't tell and that really made it difficult to place understanding in this poem.


Interpretation
I interpreted the poem to mostly be a reflection on difference between people and feelings through the use of these color and flag metaphors as the speaker goes through this journey of life - the good times and sullen and hellish times, and the times led by light of the moon or other life events.

Cohesion
I think you could keep your imagery a little bit more in one category - they were broadly nature - but then there was a lot about sight and travel too and it didn't always seem to be connecting. Try to follow what your poem is saying sentence by sentence, or even draw it out - I think you'll find it's a tad hard to follow as a complete thought.

Good luck in editing! And never stop writing!

~alliyah

Hello! I loved this poem! It was a definite joy to read! I love that it rhymes and flows so easily through out the entire piece!

Now to the nitty gritty.

First, Your themes. I definitely agree with the literature part but the romantic part I don't understand. Over all your poem doesn't state much that seems romantic except for the last line "a featherless fall for your glinting gaze." So maybe try looking a little closer to see if you really reached the main point of your theme. Although, this is just my opinion so you can ignore it if you want.
Second, the separate stanzas. in the first line you made it slightly confusing and messed with the rhyme scheme by putting "of" at the end. If you moved it down to the buttercups and lilies it would flow a lot easier. Over all, I don't see much wrong with it.

Thank you for posting your work! It was really good and I'd be glad to read more of your work in the future!