My light skinned lover

[pre]It cannot be this way but it must On this earth you and I cannot be us. You, born of the sunlight and I, daughter of the night. It is forbbiden for our worlds to unite, The ideal cannot be shifted but my feelings will never be lifted. You are what mine forever My Light skinned lover.[/pre]

Comments & reviews · 3
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User avatar
Matt Bellamy
Comment

I found this difficult to read when it wasn't broken up into seperate lines. Not sure about "You are what mine forever" but I liked this-there is hope!

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hekategirl
Review

I really like this but I think it would be better if you wrote it like this:

"It cannot be this way
But it must
On this earth you and I cannot be us.
You, born of the sunlight and I, daughter of the night.
It is forbbiden for our worlds to unite,
The ideal cannot be shifted but my feelings will never be lifted.
You are what mine forever
My Light skinned lover."

Insted of:

It cannot be this way but it must On this earth you and I cannot be us. You, born of the sunlight and I, daughter of the night. It is forbbiden for our worlds to unite, The ideal cannot be shifted but my feelings will never be lifted. You are what mine forever My Light skinned lover.

There is hope for you! :P



If fortis was here, we could have a teal party
— Pompadour