Hello Again, My Friend!
Even now I am not 100% but I think I figured out your riddle 
What The Black Eyes See...
Even if I'm wrong on the riddle, I'm really glad I wound up here; this is a fascinating (and horrifying) addition to your Shadow's Rising world! And you really have a knack for writing lyrics ~ Let's get into the details though.
Where The Dagger Points...
I have no corrections or recommendations to make! This was awesome!
Why The Grin Widened...
Ah, so many great elements here!
I love the pretenses you provided, with Crepuscule's throne above a pit of utter despair, his sadistic game with his prisoners, and the awful state of the Night Wings. It set a very grim and sorrowful stage that added to the impact of the lyrics.
With it, this verse stuck out to me:
Something terrible is happening,
though we were prospering,
we lost sanity and all our wings.
It gives the feeling that the Night Wings are at least somewhat aware of their current state, being trapped and having no control of themselves, yet there's nothing they can do about it -and that is a terrifying thing to imagine, like this almost plays into the dark fantasy or even horror genre. Though as a nut for horror, I appreciate that
The next one that hit me was this line:
Crepuscule! Are we your prey alone,
Or are we just a stepping stone for taking back the throne?
Very foreboding, the idea of something like this only being a stepping stone. I wouldn't be surprised given the story of Ash and Scorch (I'm assuming Crepuscule is the dragon king there), but it still makes me eager to see into the future of Shadow's Rising.
With words of sweetest symphony,
you brought catastrophe,
I also thought this was a great way to describe Crepuscule. It ties in so well with the little moments we've seen of his character, playing up that wickedly manipulative nature of his.
And finally, here:
Crepuscule! Whatever did we do,
That would make you take our minds away?
Good question: why treat the Night Wings this way? Why target them first? Is there something more special about this tribe than we know (and could that something be Shadow himself), or were they just the most convenient target? I feel like this song alludes to many answers, yet gives us just as many questions...
Our
Overall, this was a great piece to show off your lyrical skills, and doubled as a great way to promote your story -even to existing readers, lol. Nicely done!
Points: 40897
Reviews: 231
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