Epilouge
Ten years is a long time in most life times. For some, ten years is the difference between adolescence and adulthood, it's wisdom and freedom, experience and regret. As time progresses we fall in defeat and bath in pride . If we are lucky, we use those vital moments as learning blocks. It is those blocks we use to measure ourselves; to decide the person we want to be. Once we have that inspiration locked in our minds we strive to spin it into transformation otherwise what's the point? Ten years could be a turning point in most lifetimes. It could be the difference between a gangly awkward girl and and a strong confident women, true life and death without measure.
Pearl rich clouds graced across the otherwise blue sky hinting at the possibility of rain. The wind blew silently along the old gravel road, the only proof that it was there laid in the shuffle of the trees trying to rest peacefully. The grass sashayed along the path never minding the quickening of pace. Small creatures with Beaty eyes darted across the multicoloured stones as if they were fire under their feet. Where this road led and where it had been were questions not asked by many and could be answered by few. Sarah was one of the later. This road had once been a friend, it had shared secrets, told tales and lied of secrets buried beneath. There was trust and warmth in the comfort it had provided in Sarah's youth. The road had never wavered. curves had been wound with the span of life and bends had been wrought by winds that had raged but the road always being constant had led Sarah home more times then she could count. Today was no exception.
Standing in the midst of her friend Sarah closed her eyes and breathed in her souroundings, as the reality sunk in. She could smell the dew that lingered in the morning air complimented by the freshness of newly cut grass. She could feel the wind lace through her hair and the sun's warm kiss on her skin. Birds sung in the distance with the hum of the creek as their tune. As she opened her eyes to see it all, Sarah's heart clenched in her chest. There was no denying what she had felt and could now see. She was home.
Ten years. That's how long it had been since Sarah was this deep to heart. She had travelled the world and seen places few could even dream of. She had felt the clouds between her fingers in Meteora, Greece, she had seen trees touch the sky's in Japan, and dipped her toes in the Atlantic Ocean on the beaches of Portugal. Not one of those places could compare to this.
It had been hard to come home, hard to say she had failed at the life she had so desperately wanted all those years ago. Then again, ten years ago home hadn't felt this good. Things were differnt then, Sarah had been different then. As a teenager eager to make her mark and explore the world beyond her reach, home had seemed like a cage she couldn't break out of. Now at 28 there was something that had pulled her back to the innocents of her childhood. Something had called her back home.
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Canary word: Present
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This is a really strong start to a story. The first paragraph is a really powerful bit that sets the not quite nostalgic, but almost melodic mood for the rest of the story.
This is a great part that embodies a strong message. You took something as simple as a road and used it to let the reader learn more about Sarah. She likes things that are constant, she likes things that always stay the same.
Then in the last paragraph, you entice the reader to want to read the next part by giving her an interesting backstory, but not exactly expanding on what it is that made her home - I can say myself that I'm curious why she failed at life and why she decided to pack her things and come home.
You do have some typos and grammar mistakes, such as not capitalizing "curves" in the quoted paragraph above. Professionalism isn't too big of a deal to worry about unless you're seriously trying to write as a career, but even though sometimes they can be hard to miss, they make the reader think the author didn't look over their work closely enough. For me, it makes me think "Gee, if they don't care enough to read over their own work, why should I?" Something you can try to do to avoid missing typos or grammar mistakes is to change the font and size in your word document before you upload it. This will let you look at it with a fresh vision, and there's a good chance you'll see something wrong you didn't see before.
You have a nice style of writing and your story is pretty interesting so far. Keep it up, I look forward to reading more from you.
Great work! Your narration was brilliant and spellbinding. The descriptions of the environment was moving at its own pace. I could experience the feel of the wind and the warmth of the sun on my skin and how Sarah would have felt being at home after ten long years. I enjoyed a lot. There were some typo errors like 'som' at the first paragraph and 'differnt' at the last one. Keep writing. Good Luck!
Wow! This was breathtaking and heart touching. Your descriptions were vivid, very powerful. They left a lasting effect on me. To me, this story is an example of a perfect piece. I saw no mistakes in it because I was engrossed in your writing. I could experience the intense emotions and it nearly made me cry. You have beautifully described the road, captured the feelings right on. It felt so real. Very, very well done! I enjoyed reading it.
Keep writing!
Hello!
(I'm trying to get that fourth star!
) Anyway, this is really great.
You had very vivid description through all of this. My favorite was-

Easily fixed.
Great job, and keep writing!! 

Snazzy here for a review!
"Pearl rich clouds"
I really could see them! Great job! I only have three little nitpicks...
1st paragraph- "It could be the difference between a gangly awkward girl and and a-"
There are two 'ands' here.
2nd paragraph- "Pearl rich clouds graced across"
Just a typo, it should be raced.
3rd paragraph- "Standing in the midst of her friend Sarah closed her eyes and breathed-"
There should be a comma after friend, otherwise I sort of think her friend's name was Sarah.
Other than that, this is a really great story!
~Snazzy, Pencil, Penicillin, etc.
Stay awesome.
Just dropping a review...
This story was truly heart warming. I admired the way you described these feelings and emotions. It made me visualize the scenery of these marvelous places and experience the emotions that they could bring. And I am moved by the way you expressed the childhood home of this lovely girl.
Though I did spot one mistake. There was a typo. Instead of saying some you said som in the beginning paragraph. Otherwise, this was a amazing piece. I hope to see more from you in the future.