Young Writers Society

Stream of Consciousness

Who is my greatest influence a simple question but the answers more complicated because we're all still evolving everyday so that answer can change in an instant someone comes into your life or leaves unexpectedly and suddenly you see the world through a new lens you can go your whole life thinking you know the answer then one day you realize the greatest influence in your life might be someone else sometimes the greatest influence isn't who influenced you the most but what. people come and go from our lives but only a handful of them truly make a difference in our future it's impossible to choose one person who influenced my life the most but it's what they all taught me that matters things like love perhaps it was his absence from my life that made me strong or maybe it made me weaker whatever effect it had on me it raised me to be me at this current moment constantly looking back and feeling pity for myself I’ve come to realize that he has left a void in my life and little did I know that so many people would come and go but filling that void at the same time why do people come and go as they please why do people die is this God’s way of making us feel pain I understand that pain is necessary for the growth of a person but how much pain is too much pain how far can we be pushed what is rock bottom these are all eager questions that I personally don’t have the answer to how can one come back from rock bottom what if they aren’t able to achieve a sense of normality again what happens then do they just sulk for the rest of their life trying to get through day after day what if the person doesn’t have the right tools to help them get back on their feet what happens then does society just choose to give up on them at that point I feel like that’s the issue with society anytime we face an issue that doesn’t affect everybody's physical health nobody gives a shit if I’m being honest nobody understands what depression and anxiety does to people unless you experience it for yourself seeing the people around me being affected by these mental issues really made me think about how fucked up our society is all this stuff with social hierarchies and popularity and social media really makes being a teenager super tough not only do they have to get good grades but many also choose to climb the social ladder for many reasons one being that it gives people a boost in ego when they’re popular there are so many things wrong with society and it’s really our job to fix that for the future generations but I doubt enough people care enough just take a look at current events and Coronavirus I’m not saying that it blowing up on social media wasn’t good but there are so many other issues that the world needs to see and acknowledge and fix I firmly believe that we owe it to ourselves to help as much people as we can across the world no matter the issue Corona has been the cause to all of my problems as we’ve all been confined to our homes for less than 3 days now but I am slowly losing my mind this constant repetitive cycle of living at the moment is boring me but I definitely understand that it’s for the benefit of everyone and to kill off the virus so that we all can go back to our “normal” lives as soon as possible it’s the same process waking up doing school work eating playing games and then staying up late then repeating the same cycle the next day there are so many things you can do confined to your home it allows for overthinking and reflecting on certain moments in your life that were pivotal turning points at least for me I felt that way when people come and go from your life it really hits you that they left for a reason whether that reason be you or them or whatever it may be how I see it people are in certain chapters in your life while it hurts sometimes it’s beneficial to yourself to move on with your life and leave people behind life is essentially a train that doesn’t stop for anyone every person you meet in your life has served their purpose by being in your life they had a part in making the person you are today and for that you should be grateful even if your experience was not pleasant with them every single person teaches you a different lesson than the next everybody is different and special in their own ways but it’s those indifferences which will teach you a lesson whether it be the difference in issues, way of life or culture every detail matters when talking about someone else because a single moment does not define who a person is instead it is all their moments their best and worst and every memory in between that forms a person but very often people do not acknowledge that instead many people today judge people by their appearance and believe that one or two or a few mistakes are enough to define a person immediately stripping that person of the right to redemption very often it is hard to see this way if you are apart of that mistake and the person being wronged it’s understandable as to why you aren’t able to see the bigger picture and allow the person who caused you pain to redeem themselves the world is a very messed up place and chances at redemption are not given easily another example is the college process they say numbers don’t define you but in reality that is false there is only so much you can do when listing extra cirriculars and writing essays and supplements as to having good grades and test scores many colleges won’t look at the essays if you don’t pass their number requirements which I find reasonable but stupid at the same time why do certain people get more opportunities than others simply because their parents worked hard for it means they don’t have to