Though we have only met this year
I have a secret no one can hear
And I have written this for you and only you
Your laugh is better than any sweet treat
It's true that I could live on it, no matter the heat
I sincerely regret that I didn't tell you, because she found you too
Together you two wrote "I love you each day"
And I suffered in silence everyday, having to pay
But soon she split your heart apart
So I raised my head, sniffing the air hopefully
Hoping you would come and find me, or so I believed wholly
For I knew (knowing that if we were one) that I could be fearless
Instead of a crazy hurt mess
Finally after awhile, I got the courage to tell you the truth
Even though my family didn't approve of you, especially what you did in your youth
But then I saw you put hearts around another girls name
And it hurt me more than real life pain
Coldness crept into my heart and left a scar forever
A wound that will never be healed...never
Silver tears roll down my face
And all I do by night and day is pace..
So I stay up late
Remembering the time when we stayed up late, talking into most of the night
Thinking; this is what we would've, could've and should have been...
It needs a bit of work, 'cause in it's current from it's very difficult to read.
Though we have only met this year,
I couldn't read it as it was, so I took the liberty of dividing the text a bit, and found that I actually like it. With a bit of work this could be great. It has all the emotion it needs and conveys it to the reader in a good way.
Spoiler
I have a secret no one can hear
And I have written this for you and only you.
Your laugh is better than any sweet treat.
It's true that I could live on it,
no matter the heat I sincerely regret that I didn't tell you,
because she found you too.
Together you two wrote "I love you each day"
And I suffered in silence everyday, having to pay
But soon she split your heart apart
So I raised my head, sniffing the air hopefully.
Hoping you would come and find me, or so I believed wholly
For I knew (knowing that if we were one) that I could be fearless,
Instead of a crazy hurt mess.
Finally after awhile, I got the courage to tell you the truth,
Even though my family didn't approve of you, especially what you did in your youth
But then I saw you put hearts around another girls name
And it hurt me more than real life pain.
Coldness crept into my heart and left a scar forever.
A wound that will never be healed... never.
Silver tears roll down my face
And all I do by night and day is pace..
So I stay up late,
Remembering the time when we stayed up late, talking into most of the night.
Thinking; this is what we would've, could've and should've been...
Thank you for doing that! I really appreciate it! I'm sorry the format did not work correctly
I do not know where you write your poems, but I recommend Google Drive, or MS Word. It's a meaningful poem of sorts, but it is sloppy which isn't demeaning, I'm just telling you to polish it. Punctuation, stanzas, a couplet, and better connotative words will help a lot.
This is not in the right form it was supposed to be like a poem how do I fix it??
There should be a white "edit" button to the right of the text.