*This short little thing is underneath my folder titled “Candy cane clowns!”. Gacha Club character designs are under my forum titled “My character designs<33”. Enjoy!*
A few candy canes were left behind by some children one Christmas Eve in 1853. They did not want to eat them, they desired cookies and other pastries.
But even though they didn’t want to eat the candy canes, they still wanted to be with their families, to celebrate the Christmas that was meant to be.
And so their love for their families was enough magic for the candy canes to grow into people, to start their own civilization.
Their peculiar red and white appearance led people to think of them as clowns, hence the name “candy canes clowns”.
But despite their appearance, they still feel all the rushing, overwhelming feelings that humans feel every day…
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125,021 Literary Works • 672,740 Reviews
Heya vampricorne! Maybe is not autumn yet, but that doesn't mean that NovemberCrow can't stop by and leave a quick review! ^^
Here you presented us with a short but adorable story about how the Candy Clowns characters appeared in the world of your stories (of which you have already written quite a few!). Unfortunately, I haven't read most of your stories, so I can't say where else they appeared or how their backstory affects other stories, but I can look at what's right in this short story!
The story is relatively short, but it can be seen that you used your imagination to come up with it, thanks to which this interesting fairy tale was created. You included traditional elements for Christmas fairy tales and short stories, and the work really gives you the atmosphere of the pre-Christmas moments!
You have a very concise and minimalist writing style - the sentences are relatively short and simple in terms of literary devices, thanks to which one can read the story in no time! Maybe I would recommend you try to make the story a little longer - maybe add a little more detail about the children at the beginning of the story, or better describe what actually happened to the candy and what made them become candy cane clowns... there are many possibilities, so if you want, feel free to make the story a little longer!
Well, that's about all from my side...let me wish you a nice rest of the day/night/whatever is in your timezone, since timezones are chaotic!
- Kay, your local crow
I%u2019m so glad you enjoyed! Here is another story I have with them in case you are interested:
Cecily the candy cane clown
Hi there vampricone! My name's Atticus, and I'm here on behalf of team Holly Berries to write a review for you!
So starting with the positives, the idea of a candy cane civilization grown from Christmas magic and love is a cute and fun idea! I also liked how you mentioned that they were thought of as clowns because of their colors. That created a fun mental image in my mind that made me chuckle. I enjoyed the emphasis on how love for their families was so powerful that it created potent magic. The theme of family and magic fits right into the traditional Christmas spirit that I personally really enjoy.
Honestly my main critique is that this story is so short! I would love to see some more fleshed out descriptions of the candy cane people's adventures. In particular, I'm curious as to exactly how the candy canes grew into people. I'm imagining something like pixie dust falling from the sky onto the candy canes, and them slowly growing into people that vaguely resemble gingerbread men with white-and-red stripes. Hearing that in the story, or however you envision the magic taking place, would help bring the idea to life!
I'm also a little curious about the ending of the story. I feel like maybe it's teasing at some conflict? Perhaps some romantic love that is unreciprocated? While I always enjoy a good cliff-hanger this particular ending feels a little bit too vague, in my opinion. I think mentioning the specific emotion that the candy-cane people experience might create an even more powerful suspenseful feeling.
Overall this was a cute, Christmasy story! I enjoyed the themes of holiday spirit, love, and magic throughout. The only thing I would improve upon is adding more description to pull the reader into the story, and to maybe add some more specifics to the ending so that the reader understands what's going on. I hope this was helpful to you and enjoyable!
Brought to you by The Holly Berries!
~Atticus
Thank you for reading!!
I love your story. Its actually such an amazing idea!!
Thank you. ^v^