Warning: This work has been rated 16+.
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138,359 Literary Works • 672,109 Reviews
You should delete this work to get it out of the green room.
Hey Firedancer here to review your short story. Sorry if I write anything that offends you, I'm just genuinely trying to help and to share my opinion, because that's what people want isn't it? Opinions? Tips and tricks? Someone praising their work, in order to boost their confidence? Anyways, I'll try and incorporate at least one of the above mentioned items into my review.
Haha sorry, just really writing this review to get points :/ If your work was here than I would review that,but sadly it is not, so instead I will post this random little story, enjoy!
Shianne poured the liquid into her cup, watching the bubbles slowly coalesce on the surface. The cup was actually quite tiny, compared to other shot glasses she had seen. She slowly brought the cup up to her lips her hand shaking, and her insides twisting with apprehension. Nervously licking her lips, she brought the cup into the air in a mock toast to the boy.
“Here’s to losing brain cells.” Shianne said. The guy grinned at her.
“To brain cells!” He said. Together, they both brought their drinks up to their lips, but instead of downing the shot, Shianne paused, her mouth on the rim of the cup. The boy downed his shot in less than a second. Shianne brought her cup down and smiled at the boy. He grinned back stupidly. Then, he seemed to notice that Shianne hadn’t touched her drink. Confusion crossed his face momentarily, wrinkling up his brow. Realizing what had happened he looked up, frightened.
“You!” He gasped. He took a step towards her, and then crumpled to the ground, his eyes rolling up to the whites. Shianne inhaled sharply as he hit the floor, positive that someone would have heard the thump, or that it wouldn’t work. But the music was too loud at the club and his body remained motionless on the ground. She let out a shaky laugh and licked her lips again. She had done it. She had actually done it.
Stepping over his body, she grabbed her purse from the counter and fled the scene.
Yup. Sorry again but I swear if your work was actually here than I would review it.
You should not review blank works. You should report blank works to moderators.