Note: Penglipur Lara in traditional Malay culture is the local storyteller for every village or town.
Oh Mister Storyteller, story teller,
Tell me a tale or two.
Of Kings and Queens, Of life and colour,
And maybe I'll listen to you.
If it is story that you want,
Then sit down really still.
Don't say a word as I start,
Open your ears and listen well.
Long ago, far away,
On a sandy beach by the sea.
Three boys did walk side by side,
To see what they wanted to see,
They saw the birds fly so high,
With wings as white as snow.
The sand that crept through their toes,
Was also as bright as gold.
They wondered and pondered,
Questions running through their head.
Why were they as black as night,
Wouldn't it be great to be white instead?
They kept on walking, across the sand,
Not bothering at all to look down.
The sky was beautiful and had to be watched,
Until one of them fell flat on the ground.
The boy cursed and cursed again,
While the other boys just stood and laughed,
The boy looked at his feet to see,
What was it that blocked his path.
A glass jar, sealed tight by a lid,
Cracked by time, but still unbroken.
He held the jar tight in his hand,
And with a mighty pull the lid did he open.
A flash and a bang, a whizz and a whoosh,
The jar went flying across the sand.
Then there it stood before the boys,
A mighty, but strangely green, man.
I am released and free!
And I have only you to thank!
So gather around three black boys,
One wish each I will grant.
The savior went first as he declared:
I should go first, as I saved this man.
So please, oh please, I wish for this!
Make me as white and great as you can.
The wish was granted, and the boy was gone,
only to reappear after a while.
True to his wish, he was white and mighty,
With a handsome golden smile.
The second boy was quick to react,
And the whole land did hear him shout
Well, I want to be whiter and greater than him,
with even more brilliant looks, no doubt!
True to his wish, there he was,
Even more brilliant than his friend,
Two had made their wish already now,
And only the third black boy remained.
The third boy was the wisest of the three,
And he was quiet the whole time.
He watched his friends indulge in greed,
And he knew he had to draw the line.
I could ask for greatness and power,
And I could be whiter than the both of you!
But no, a lesson I would rather teach,
So I wish that you both look like me too.
The man obliged, and granted the wish
With his arms raised and a smile on his face.
He smiled and bowed to the boys,
Before disappearing, without a trace.
So there they stood, all three of them black,
and they turned around, and made their way back.
So there you go, the end has come,
You have listened and I am done,
So take a lesson, use it in life,
And make sure to come back another night
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
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Wow, impressive. Very, very impressive. I can't say nothing lower than impressive.
I couldn't even find a mistake in that peice. It was, it was...impressive. So congratulations, you have made a very good poem. Also, usually narrative poetry doesn't tell a story that long. Yet yours did, not in great detail, but somehow the detail would of runined it. It was great, I really enjoyed it.
You are really talented, I just can't say how well you've written this poem. It's impressive, very impressive. So, congratulations!
Hello there,
I didn't expect the ending, its quite amusing actually :3 I think the story itself flowed well, but the parts in bold seemed rather forced. Other than that it was quite interesting and it actually sounded as a folk song/story :3