z

Young Writers Society



Hot Air Balloon

by boz


Love isn’t a word,
so don’t say it again please.
My ears are bleeding.
Can’t you see the streaming fountains flowing?
I wonder if it ever occurred to you,
up there in your balloon full of hot air,
whether it might be nice,
every once in a while,
if you came down.


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98 Reviews


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Mon Mar 16, 2009 12:59 am
chasingcolts21 says...



Oh no, I understood it, I just don't think the title just fits right. Maybe it's just me. I'm a bit weird like that. :P

It's probably because it wasn't described enough or something. -_-

Sorry.

-Colt




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Mon Mar 16, 2009 12:56 am
boz says...



Nice sweet review! It was warming. But that's beside the point, because you completely misinterpreted the poem. The title is an extended metaphor representing the "hot air" or inadequacy of words to sustain love. So what dosen't fit about the title? Did you just miss the metaphor part? But I'm glad you liked it. Although, I would have much preferred you understood it.
I don't mean to be so snappy; but try to understand a poem before you review it! Thanks for the rules; I wasn't aware. And thanks for the review.




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Points: 890
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Mon Mar 16, 2009 12:55 am
boz says...



Nice sweet review! It was warming. But that's beside the point, because you completely misinterpreted the poem. The title is an extended metaphor representing the "hot air" or inadequacy of words to sustain love. So what dosen't fit about the title? Did you just miss the metaphor part? But I'm glad you liked it. Although, I would have much preferred you understood it.
I don't mean to be so snappy; but try to understand a poem before you review it! Thanks for the rules; I wasn't aware. And thanks for the review.




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98 Reviews


Points: 1155
Reviews: 98

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Mon Mar 16, 2009 12:18 am
chasingcolts21 wrote a review...



Hello, my name is Colt.

Welcome to YWS! I see you are new, so you probably don't know the rules yet. We have a strict rule stating that for every piece of work you post, you must have reviewed to other pieces of work. This is to keep the site balanced.

Nice sweet poem! It was warming.

First, I'd cut the poem into two verses instead. You can always add more detail and description too! And lastly, I don't think the title fits right...I just don't like.

Overall, this was a good job! I liked it!





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— John Oliver