A+
Today I read Emily of New Moon, about a girl who is orphaned and has to live with her aunt at New Moon farm. There is many interesting characters, such as Emily herself, Elise, her aunt, and her father, who dies at the beginning. This book has taught many lessons to me, like always write, never give up, and more.
To be honest with you, This book uninterested me more than I thought it would. So I am going to keep writing to make it look like I did a good job and wrote since you never look at the test and will be lazy grading it. Once I saw an ad that said, "Don't eat this food- it makes you gain weight!" It was bananas. I love bananas. Nothing rhymes with bananas. Also nothing rhymes with rhymes. It is painful. My brother doesn't know how to rhyme. Things rhyme with brother, like mother and other, but not much. Touch and clutch rhyme with much. At home we have much teddy bears. They are all brown like Dr. Pepper. They are stuffed and can't eat it. You don't eat Dr. Pepper, you drink it. That's crazy. Hazy and lazy rhyme with crazy. You're lazy. I'm having a hoot right now. Flute rhymes with hoot. Flutes are fancy. You know what else is fancy? Evening dresses, that's what. Teacher, to be honest with you, you're too fat to look elegant in an evening dress. I saw a lady at Goodwill looking for evening dresses. She was looking at a princessy one that was white. Wait, she was looking for a wedding dress. Why would anyone sell their wedding dress. She needed to go to the mall. I like the mall. Once I found a fun toy there. Toys have been around for a long time. I've written enough now so you'll think I did good.
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125,013 Literary Works • 672,842 Reviews
Alright, honesty this wasn't funny to me.
I was a little bored and didn't really find it interesting. I don't think it was really worth reading. I'm not afraid to state my opinion but despite the outcome don't be upset take this criticism as experience and stride for more next time.
Now please don't take this as offense, but I'm only stating my opinion.
Frankly it was alright, on a scale from 1-10 it was a 4. Now this doesn't mean you should stop writing. No please, keep on writing.
The good thing about this, is there we're no punctual or grammar mistakes. I'll give you a few tips.
-Try using a different subject when trying humor. Politics or something like that, or try a funny story that happened to you or something.
-This wasn't really funny and sorry to say doesn't belong in humor.
-Write, write, write. Practice makes perfect.
Also, it was kind of confusing, I didn't really get most of the humor, this might be funny for the age group of 4-8 but not the older generation. Really sorry, I hope you take my advice into consideration.
Sincerely, @ScarletDreams14; Member of Salsa Verde
Writer, Artist, Student and Reader
?Hey, yo, Awesome4! Strange here on this fantastic Review Day and I have a review for you!
This was very mean and blunt. You obviously handled this with extreme care, yet ruthlessly took it out on a teacher. Nothing bad about that, it's actually somewhat funny. Who doesn't love when a person is extremely mean to a teacher and criticizes the teacher, while calling her fat and making fun of her? In all seriousness, that aspect is funny. Doesn't mean that this is funny, as it ultimately left me in the dust. It just really confused me, as it seemed like you were saying random stuff that mocks her. That is somewhat funny, depends on how you use it. When you blatantly criticize her out of context, it's just crude. Maybe she thought it was an A+? Everyone thinks different. Just because you don't agree with her doesn't mean you have to go on a full blown rant, hurting her feelings with no care towards the other. Also, this is out of context. Where does this come in? All this is to me is a random rant, and I can't tell whether I thoroughly enjoyed it or not. It left me confused, and it was mean. It was really mean. Extremely mean, actually. Now, I'm a harsh person, but not this harsh. This was, interesting nonetheless.
Overall, okay job.
Strange gives you..
5.9/10
Good job,
Keep writing,
Stay groovy, my friend.
#TheFaultInOurReviews
I wrote this with a friend, we were aiming for it to be perfectly, well, confusing. Well, see you around YWS!
Hello! Happy Review Day!
I like the idea behind this work. While, I understand that it is meant to be humorous, I had trouble keeping up with it. It seemed to be here and there, all over the place crazy. By the end I was confused. Maybe just tidying up the content just a smidgen will help with that. It needs to be a little bit smoother to read.
I like the short choppy sentences, but eventually, this gets boring. You need to space it out with a few longer sentences so that it does not become monotonous to read.
While I did say that it was a little bit crazy with jumping topics, there were a few places that were hilarious and were executed with an excellent transition. I especially liked where you called your teacher fat. It flowed from one thought to the other while still being connected and made sense.
However, in some places, it just didn't work for me. One moment you were talking about how you have lots of Doctor Pepper colored Teddy Bears, but then you're saying that you drink Doctor Pepper, not eat it....I see the connection, it just doesn't make sense to me how you jump from one to the next in a single cohesive thought. The first time I read that part, I thought it said that your Teddy Bears were stuffed with the Doctor Pepper. It was very confusing.
Just working on these transitions could change this from a good piece of humor writing into a great or even excellent piece of Humor Writing
Over all, I really enjoyed this piece and hope to see more from you soon! This is really good, considering that you are ten and that most people on YWS are in their teen years and twenties. Hope to see you around YWS soon!
Happy Review Day! Go Rudigo Sol!
yubbies21
Being mixed up and changing topics were what I was aiming for. And this is not a serious story, a friend and I wrote it.